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Kidney transplant

(20 Posts)
MrsPickle Wed 19-Jun-19 13:56:49

My DiL has just donated a kidney to save her bro, brave lady.

She's really suffering some awful after effects and she can't see the kids as they're not allowed on the ward.
I know she's in the best, safest hands imaginable, but I think it's worse than she imagined or let on to others.

She thought she'd be home and picking up the pieces of her life very soon.

Anyone else gone through this please and can offer any helpful advice? Not medical, because, as I said, she is in the best hands.

Thanks... just seeking reassurance really.

crazyH Wed 19-Jun-19 14:06:05

Brave lady indeed.......I doubt many of us know of a similar situation, but I could be wrong. I am sending some virtual flowers for her. And hope she recovers well .

gillybob Wed 19-Jun-19 15:00:15

My mum was on dialysis for 3 days every week for the last 10 years of her life MrsPickle and sadly decided enough was enough and died just 3 years ago aged 73 . She was too weak and had too many other issues to ever be considered for a transplant. Having seen many young people living with kidney failure and the horrible side effects of dialysis your DDiL is giving her brother the greatest gift . She is indeed one very brave lady . I send her my very best wishes for a very speedy recovery and to her brother for a successful transplant . x

Jane10 Wed 19-Jun-19 15:18:04

Sorry to hear that gillybob and MrsPickle. My only experience of this is of a colleague at work who was an 'altruistic' donor of one of his kidneys. He was off work for some weeks but made a good recovery to the extent of competing in his sport at world level. I hope your DiL feels much better soon. Brave girl. ?

Fennel Wed 19-Jun-19 15:33:55

I know someone who donated a kidney to his father. The son was in his 30s at the time, father in his 60s.
I don't know about any early problems, but both are doing fine now, and are very 'close'.

Floradora9 Wed 19-Jun-19 16:33:04

I know a husband and wife who did a kidney swop it was hard at first for the donner but she soon recovered and is hale and hearty now .

Humbertbear Wed 19-Jun-19 18:23:45

My son had major surgery on a kidney and was in hospital for two weeks. She has had major surgery. Is there WiFi on the ward? Can your DiL FaceTime or Skype the children? She should write them notes or draw pictures for them. When she is allowed out of the ward she could meet the children in the hospital cafe.
I hope both your DiL and her brother make a full and speedy recovery. Please let us know.

Fennel Wed 19-Jun-19 18:57:10

I'm sure they'll both be able to appreciate this wonderful donation eventually.
To enable another person to continue living is one of the best gifts.

Davida1968 Wed 19-Jun-19 19:05:15

I had a colleague who donated a kidney to her daughter It worked out well for both of them. Wishing you every happiness with the outcome of this. Such a stressful time for you all - but it can be wonderful!

Dawn22 Wed 19-Jun-19 19:13:23

Thinking of your Dear Dil. She is lucky to have you- a kind and caring Mil. Now that is how it should be.

Dawn22 Wed 19-Jun-19 19:14:33

Blessings to both of you.
From Dawn

sodapop Wed 19-Jun-19 19:37:48

Your daughter in law is a brave woman MrsPickle I don't have first hand experience of this but the people I have heard of have all gone on to have happy, healthy lives. It will take some time for a full recovery but it will happen I'm sure.
I agree with Dawn22 so good to hear such a positive story, bless both of you.

harrigran Thu 20-Jun-19 10:13:11

Your DIL will need time and TLC to recover, the donor procedure is more onerous than that of the recipient. Can she Skype the children on her phone ? may make her feel better if she can at least talk to them.

Bathsheba Thu 20-Jun-19 12:31:30

I have no experience of this MrsPickle, but I just wanted to say what a wonderful person your DiL is, and how lucky your grandchildren are to have her for a mother. Indeed, how lucky your son and all of you are to have such a brave and caring person in your life.
Sending some virtual flowers for her and wishing her godspeed in her recovery. Treasure your DDiL, she is a gem smile

MrsPickle Thu 20-Jun-19 13:28:06

Thank you all for your kind reassuring words.
My help has been practical, as I can't get in to visit, so we've had the kids and I've cooked meals and frozen them in foil trays.
Doesn't help that she is fiercely independent!!

Luckygirl Thu 20-Jun-19 14:18:11

A friend of mine made an altruistic donation of a kidney to a random member of the public. All went well and now very quickly fit as a fiddle.

wecareindia Tue 02-Jul-19 11:23:25

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SparklyGrandma Tue 02-Jul-19 11:30:33

I had a nephrectomy, the most painful post op I have experienced plus for me it took about 2 years to get bodily strength and energy back.

For a while after, I found it very sore to sit up for too long. Best cure in that Summer was lying on a flat out sun bed in my garden, enjoying the fresh air. ( Cheap sunbed with thick cushion £35).

Your DiL has been very brave, what a wonderful gift to give her DB MrsPickle.

sazz1 Sun 07-Jul-19 21:25:27

My neighbours daughter donated her kidney to her aunt. Her aunt was much better in a few week but neighbours daughter took a long time to recover. I think this is the usual case for the donor to take a longer time.

gillybob Sun 07-Jul-19 22:48:33

You are absolutely right sazzl I saw this many times during my mums time on dialysis . It seems the donor always takes a longer time to recover than the recipient. I do hope MrsPickles DiL is doing okay . What a very brave lady she is . X