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Health

Just turned 50 and feeling morbid

(142 Posts)
Annabelle01 Mon 16-Sept-19 10:04:32

I turned 50 in July and it suddenly hit me full on that I may only have 20 years left. I can't seem to get this morbid thought out of my head and move on to make the most of every day. Has anyone else experienced this?

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 18:46:11

Sirchenjin the OP is obviously about getting old. At fifty. So I don't give a stuff what you think.

SirChenjin Mon 16-Sept-19 18:50:23

I’m perfectly well aware of what the OP is about. I care not about your stuffs and lack thereof.

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 18:51:24

? piss orf

SirChenjin Mon 16-Sept-19 18:59:13

And the very same to you grin

Sr69 Mon 16-Sept-19 19:12:23

Can't read anymore posts as I'm going to be 70 in January and they are making me feel really depressed .
Never gave it a thought until I read these comments.

MawB Mon 16-Sept-19 19:24:40

I suppose I thoughtOP was possibly being tactless to moan to a forum aimed at the “older” generation about feeling “morbid at 50” especially adding that she may not have more than another 20 years left when it might have occurred to her to realise that most of us are in that age group.hmm ?
A bit like moaning about the price of smart shoes to a group of disabled people or amputees.

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 19:28:46

Read the "Elderly" thread Sr69. I'm the only one there feeling knackered. Everyone else is feeling like spring chickens!

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 19:29:17

The grammar in that last post may be slightly suspect.

merlotgran Mon 16-Sept-19 19:32:27

Exactly, Maw. The OP wouldn't be out of place on Mumsnet but on here??

My Dad was fifty when he died so two much loved people in my family didn't get a chance to worry about 20 years

DH is in hospital with another life threatening bug. The second in 18 months so I'd better stay off this thread or I might say something that will get me banned.

Ta, Gonegirl for saying it for me. grin

MiniDriver56 Mon 16-Sept-19 19:36:43

I’m 63 and loving life! I had a TIA at 59 but I’m determined to live longer than my parents who both passed away at 72! I do lots of walking and it helps my mental health very much. Give it a go!

MawB Mon 16-Sept-19 19:38:20

flowers to you and MrMerlot - infections are such a worry. Paw came out with C Diff confused which he certainly didn’t have when he was first admitted sad

SirChenjin Mon 16-Sept-19 19:45:47

Gransnet is for over fifties - ie people who are 50 and over. If you feel that’s too young then complain to GN admin. Those of us who are fifty might have different worries or concerns to those on here who are older, but we manage not to tell them to piss off. It’s not a competition to see who has the most to worry about or be upset about - everyone on here has their own story, and it would be nice if we could recognise that and be supportive or at least offer constructive suggestions that aren’t rude, dismissive or patronising.

olliebeak Mon 16-Sept-19 19:51:12

Get out of the house and find yourself something to do that'll take your mind of 'being 50'!

Just look at all the inspirational 'older women' that are around these days - you've got y-e-a-r-s ahead of you, but it's up to YOU how you spend them.

I work in a charity shop that is very busy - the vast majority of our volunteers are over 65, with many of them over 80!

I've always wanted to join the U3A - but just can't find the time to 'fit it in'!

Has your family perhaps had a history of people dying around the age of 70? If so, you need to remember that 'that was then' - you are living NOW. Times have changed - lifestyles have moved on and so has the world of medicine.

Life is GOOD - c'mon, make the most of it party on wink!

MawB Mon 16-Sept-19 19:57:41

Gransnet is for over fifties - ie people who are 50 and over. If you feel that’s too young then complain to GN admin

Exactly, Sirchenjin - “and over” - so it stands to reason that many of us are in that demographic.
It is not nice to be told that somebody is feeling depressed because she doesn’t expect to live to our age!
Of course 50 year olds have their worries.
I lost my mother when I was 50 and it was chastening to feel I was inching my way to being the “senior” one in the family, without the cushion of the generation above me.
But you must see that those who are older, even much older than the much- quoted “three score years and ten” do not need reminding of our mortality- life generally does that for us.

SirChenjin Mon 16-Sept-19 20:14:22

I’m well aware of that Mawand I suspect that the OP is too - but (for some of us) turning fifty has brought with it things that remind us of our own mortality and while I don’t believe for a minute the OP was trying to offend anyone I don’t think she deserves to be on the receiving end of some of the posts on here.

As for ‘keeping busy’ to keep your mind off things - ha! Nearly 20 more years of working full time ahead of me, ferrying a 12 year old to things and dealing (to a point) with 2 university students, voluntary work, hobbies, 2 elderly parents at opposite ends of the country to deal with and trying to keep up with friends - us 50 year olds are actually already quite busy.

M0nica Mon 16-Sept-19 20:17:49

Anabelle Life expectancy is currently well over 80, so why do you think life ends at 70? In fact all the pension crisis derives from the fact that we are living longer and longer and more and more of that time in good health.

Wait until you are 80 and then begin to get morbid. In the meanwhile - well I am 76, fit healthy and loving my interesting and lively life.

crazyH Mon 16-Sept-19 20:23:36

By Annabelle's calculation, I should have died a couple of years ago

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 20:34:41

Sirchenjin I can't believe you didn't realise that 'piss off' was lighthearted! I am absolutely, well, gobsmacked!

SirChenjin Mon 16-Sept-19 20:36:49

No I didn’t realise - especially after your ‘I don’t give a stuff what you think’ comment

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 20:44:39

Sigh! You know, I'm wondering if 78 can really mix well with 50.

Shame the Age UK forums were taken over by GN.

SirChenjin Mon 16-Sept-19 20:57:46

Of course they can - what are you on about?! We just have to be mindful that we all have different experiences and lives - one is not more valid than the other.

ReadyMeals Mon 16-Sept-19 21:32:22

Anyone who was going to be negatively affected by this thread didn't need to read it - it's fairly clear from the title the types of feelings that were going to be discussed AND the age that they were being experienced. Those who became upset by someone of 50 being affected by this fear could wait until they see a thread entitled "Just turned 90 and feeling morbid" before opening the thread.

Motherofmany Mon 16-Sept-19 21:56:12

Since being 50 we have adopted 3 children the last one was 3 when I was 65 and DH was 62, so obviously Social Services thought we going were not going to pop our clogs yet. We are now 76 and 72 still caring for 5 with special needs. They keep us young and on our toes life is for living grab every day and enjoy!

M0nica Mon 16-Sept-19 22:05:16

We are getting taken over by people upset by other people's live's ( not just this thread)- too sad, too upsetting, too good. - and wanting the thread removed or closed down because they find it upsetting.

It smacks of passive aggression, a form of bullying. stopping anyone reading any thread the complainer doesn't like, regardless of the fact that many other people are enjoying it. 'You can only read and enjoy what I decide is enjoyable. Your choices do not count'

If you don't like thread, do not read it or contribute to it.

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sept-19 22:17:27

Who can really take this seriously? 'I'm fifty. I must be getting old. I might be going to die of old age soon'.

Oh come on! Grow up. hmm

Or try Mumsnet.