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Fear of dentist

(71 Posts)
Sheena Fri 01-Nov-19 19:57:17

I changed last year from my dentist as I hated going and had lost confidence in her. So I changed and went to a small private practice and my initial appointment went ok until she told me I had to have a tooth out. I had lost a bit of filling and thought she would patch me up ,but no... the tooth had to come out . Very traumatic as I said.. I have a complete phobia but I got through it. Took a long time to heal and ulcerated quite badly but in the end it healed. Then in June I went back as getting twinges with hot and cold in another tooth ... she said the whole filling had to come out and a new one in .. an hour.s appointment ... o m g I was terrified but yes , I got through it. BUT .. it is far worse than it was .. she put a composite filling in which feels horrid and rough .. and heavens ! The hot and cold sensations are far worse.... I am trying to hang on and not go back but it is misery ... and I now feel I’ve lost faith in her too. I thought going to a private one would give me more confidence, which it did at first, but each time I’ve seen her I’ve gone through agonies. Ok , maybe my teeth are now starting to deteriorate ... but I feel nervous to go back to her. My common sense tells me I am being foolish , but oh, I now worry I need to find another dentist . Don’t know what to do .

Rich1e Sat 02-Nov-19 23:19:43

I last visited the dentist about 25 years ago. At age 70 now, my teeth are rotten. Apart from the phobia about dentists, I now have a phobia about paying for teeth out and false teeth!

tidyskatemum Sat 02-Nov-19 20:51:28

I didn’t go to the dentist for donkey’s years after several bad experiences but gave in a couple of years ago after accepting what a state my mouth was in. I went to a local private dentist who advertises being pain free and althoughI ended up having to have a complete top denture I have to say the experience was as good as it could be, right down to the dental nurse stroking my arm and making soothing noises while the dentist did his stuff!

123kitty Sat 02-Nov-19 20:39:36

I read recently that some people have an extra nerve in their teeth, has anybody else heard.of this? Maybe it explains how my husband has fillings without being numbed and never feels a thing, whereas my mouth has to be completely numb.

Carooline Sat 02-Nov-19 19:53:10

Sheena, I had composites in a few of my molars & they are fabulous. They look amazing, just like a tooth, they feel great so smooth so I'd say change your dentist! Good luck x

Brigidsdaughter Sat 02-Nov-19 18:02:20

I suffered the school dentist. Now go to a lovely man in Worcester Park. Hes really good with his hands and born to be a dentist with s great manner and willing to give drugs to relax too

MooM00 Sat 02-Nov-19 17:16:07

Disgruntled, I too have gum problems with food pockets. I go to see my dentist every 6 months and a hygienist every 3 months. I now have to see in a few days time a periodontist and I can assure you I am not looking forward to it at all. I understand that they cut into your gum to do a better clean of the food pocket then they stitch the gum back. I am feeling panicky now at the very thought. I will make sure I take up your suggestion off olive oil or coconut oil in the future although it sounds rather odd. How often do you do the procedure ??.

anniezzz09 Sat 02-Nov-19 16:35:16

I'm another hypnotherapy fan. I don't like the dentist but can cope but I was utterly phobic about flying. Three visits to a hypnotherapist and I am completely cured. Its been 5 years since I had the treatment and I still yawn on the way to the airport!

B9exchange Sat 02-Nov-19 14:56:58

I've had a fear of dentists ever since I was 14 and the dentist yanked two teeth out without waiting for the anaesthetic to kick in. I went into shock and my mother was called into his room to scoop me up and take me to the doctors! As that was followed by the orthodontist using an adult sized plate for taking impressions, over filling it and forcibly holding it in my mouth whilst I choked as my airway was blocked, I think perhaps I have reason. I used to be able to conquer it for fillings, but it is getting worse now, if I needed major work I would have to be put out.

Jane10 Sat 02-Nov-19 14:28:05

I was lucky to have the same lovely kind lady dentist for years. She changed to being private but the Denplan scheme is very cheap for me (about £10 pcm). That covers any treatment plus 2 checkups a year and a dental hygienist session.
However, she retired suddenly last summer and now I have a young man as dentist. He's very nice but...
I had to have a complicated filling last week and really found it an ordeal. Had to have 2 injections. No pain but pressure and loud drills etc it felt quite brutal. I was amazed when it was over and tried to reach out for the cup of water that my hand was shaking uncontrollably! I felt quite shaken up all day. Over now. Phew!

grandtanteJE65 Sat 02-Nov-19 14:14:23

Phone the dentists in your area and explain that you are looking for one who is used to treating patients who are afraid of dentists and have had unpleasant experiences when having treatment.

A lot of dentists are trained to cope with this problem, which is exceedingly common - most of us dislike going to the dentist and can easily understand why others are terrified. Dentists can understand too.

It is worth taking time to find a dentist you can feel comfortable with and whom you can trust.

Nellie098 Sat 02-Nov-19 14:06:32

Make sure you use a toothpase for sensitive teeth. I have a sensitive top tooth but by using Sensodine (any type) twice a day I never have any problems now. It can also help short term if you just rub a little into the sensitive area now and then. Although I spend ages on thoroughly cleaning my teeth using those things for the gaps, floss etc it never seems good enough. At my last visit I was told I must use my electric toothbrush and I guess it must help. My lovely dentist left a while ago before the practice was taken over and the man I first saw managed to polish my lip instead of my tooth so I looked like I had been punched for a day or two. Obviously I asked to change to someone else and my latest dentist is a lovely lady.

Camelotclub Sat 02-Nov-19 13:56:45

I used to hate and fear the dentist until I had a lovely one who put me at ease - mind you, he was private!

Then after breast cancer treatment I realised nothing a dentist could do to me would be worse than that and I have no fear now.

Camelotclub Sat 02-Nov-19 13:54:48

My dentist in the 1960s would smoke in between bouts of drilling. He'd be struck off now!

WOODMOUSE49 Sat 02-Nov-19 13:42:08

You can't choose which NHS dentist/practice you want in Cornwall. Don't know what it is like in other counties.

We have go on a waiting list and when a place comes up you are offered it regardless of how far you have to travel.

Know a family that have moved 3 times. The NHS practices they were with became private. They couldn't afford it. Now offered place 30 min drive away.

There are 48,000 on the waiting list for NHS dentist in Cornwall !

optimist Sat 02-Nov-19 13:32:14

After a lifetime of feeling scared of the dentist I went to a private dentist recommended who also employs an anaesthetist, I have had loads of work done and the only thing that hurts is my purse! Actually, I am now brave enough to remain conscious while having work done.

ayse Sat 02-Nov-19 13:01:53

I too have a fear of visiting the dentist as I suffered the same way as Madmaggie in the 1960s. I’ve always had excellent NHS dentists, so do find a different dentist. I always remind mine of my fear. It’s the fear of the pain and an injury unsympathetic dentist.

I love the idea of swishing the mouth out with olive or coconut oil.

Go with your gut feeling and find another dentist. I’ve found younger dentists are far more approachable than some of the old school

Bluedaisy Sat 02-Nov-19 12:48:46

Try looking to see if you have a St Faith dentist in your area or a hospital consultant dentist who practice privately? I know St Faith take very nervous patients only and also do general anaesthetics if the patient needs work but is too nervous also we’ve relocated recently and was ripped off by the first private dentist we managed to sign on with but then I did some research and came across (by googling) a Consultant dentist at the local hospital who practices in a private practice in the evening and he was great, kind, quick and didn’t tell me I needed fillings etc when I really didn’t! Good luck

Nvella Sat 02-Nov-19 12:35:57

I hate the hygienist more than the dentist. Have to have about 6 injections for a scale and polish. Every time I go (every 3 months) I am tempted to tell them to take all my teeth out so I never have to go again!

Madmaggie Sat 02-Nov-19 12:28:36

I'm was scared of dentists like many others. I think it dates back to being held down in the chair and having the gas mask forced on as a child. Unnecessary fillings as back then they were paid by the nhs on number done (a British trained dentist in nz explained this) its no wonder we grew up scared. it took all my nerve to make an appointment recently when I lost half a molar, after 4yrs away I went. The dentist who I saw was a gentle giant even put the numbing gel on my gum before injecting. Told me my options & estimated cost. Discovered nerve was dead& that to avoid potential probs a root canal was best before a crown was fitted. two of the appointments were long but he explained some things and I found it easier to deal with. Its private so was expensive but necessary. Their equipment is amazing now even my crown was produced via 3D at a lab and is a perfect fit. I still go stiff at the high pitched drill. This year I had 3 sessions with a hypnotherapist to help with some other issues and did an 8 week mindfulness course and found I was using what I'd learned to cope in the chair. It really helped.

Anthea1948 Sat 02-Nov-19 12:28:15

I am so sorry for you, Sheena. I, too, am terrified of the dentist. I had all my teeth out when I was 32 and am grateful ever day. However, I occasionally have to have new dentures made and although I'm well aware I'm not going to be hurt I start to shake as soon as I go in the building. I think it's the evocative smell.
In other areas of pain I have a fairly high tolerance but at the dentists I was a wreck. You have my complete sympathy.
However, I believe these days there are good dentists around who will take into consideration a patient's fear and act accordingly. Maybe you could ask around, see if anyone you know knows of such a dental surgery?

Parklife1 Sat 02-Nov-19 11:59:30

We had a dentist we were happy with for many years and then we moved. We carried on going back for a while, but it was a three hour round trip, so not really practical.

We hunted around and found an NHS dentist, but after one visit, I knew I wouldn’t go back. Moved to another NHS one and went several times. She took out one tooth, fitted a single false tooth, which I don’t wear, because the edge of the plate hurts my gums and caused a hole in the tooth next to it. She did a filling which fell out after a couple of months and then redid it. By then, I’d lost confidence in her too.

There are no other dentists who provide NHS care, so I’ve ended up with a private one. It has taken him and the hygienist eighteen months to sort out my teeth.

I think it’s a real shame that, it seems as though you have to pay for private treatment in order to get good dental care.

Sparklefizz Sat 02-Nov-19 11:52:27

Sheena and for anyone who lives in the Bristol - Bath area, my dental practice is fab. All 4 dentists there are lovely and caring and gentle. PM me if you want to try them.

25Avalon Sat 02-Nov-19 11:46:37

I sympathise and emphasise entirely. I was terrified of the dentist after a bad childhood experience. Then I had a wonderful NHS dentist for 20 years which helped enormously. He retired and sold the practise to a successive range of young newly qualified dentists in whom I developed little faith - one filling kept falling out time and time again. I was thinking of changing practices when the practice was sold to an Asian dentist who had qualified at the School of Surgeons in Edinburgh. He was absolutely wonderful. That filling is still there after 10years plus and all the other work he did is intact. He then went. 2 more dentists and the latest dentist just seems to be interested in money and I have no great confidence in his skills. So I have left and am looking for another dentist.

Like you I have asked locally but still cannot find a recommendation I feel is right. I want an experienced dentist because at my age I have had a lot of dentistry work done and I need someone who is more than competent, plus I need someone to put me at ease. So I understand your predicament. I have left my dentist practice after 40 years and now looking for someone else. I can't answer your question only echo what do we do? Can we have experienced dentist clinics for oldies?

PatriciaH Sat 02-Nov-19 11:44:48

I’m sorry you have had this experience. I retired this year after 42 yrs as a dental hygienist. I would say the composite filling should not feel rough and it should be very easy to polish it. Teeth that were sensitive before a filling can sometimes take a while to settle down. If you feel you can go back you should give the dentist a chance to polish it. If you have lost all confidence then maybe find someone else. Where do you live? I may be able to recommend.

JaneJudge Sat 02-Nov-19 11:41:54

Google dentists that are good with dental phobias in my area and forums and all sorts will come up. It's really not uncommon and I do wonder how all the good, nice dentists feel about the ones who are rough