Autism diagnosed as an adult?

How has one person got a private diagnosis for £70 yet someone else was told it will cost £1000 for the same thing?

Meant he did do,& vice versa.

I don't know wether the adult tests are the same,but after 3yrs wait my son (now nearly 17) was tested as an early teenager and was found to be 'borderline' so then they decided that meant they could not declare he 'officially' had ASD,but he told me some of the things they denied he did he didnt do,and vice versa,and like Mary XYX he had by then 'taught' himself to look people in the eye,as thats what they wanted him to do,and the 'right' ways to respond/ give 'right' answers,so its not a correct diagnosis as these people obviously could not tell the difference,this meant he couldnt get the help he so desperately really needs,but when i looked through some of his medical gp notes it said 'aspergers' on his list of diagnosis,yet no ones said to me officially he has this,yet it would explain so much about his behaviours,he has people he speaks to at college but doesnt want any best friends,and won't go out to socialise with them,he has 'gaming' friends on videogames and he's happy with that.Everyone is different in how they perceive things.My grandson has autism diagnosed when a child,he's now 21 and he dislikes socialising,but he's not withdrawn and can't speak.he just likes to choose whom he speaks to.

My daughter in law who is a teacher thinks I am " on the autism spectrum". She is probably right. I would not want to change me and neither would she or anyone else.

A friend of mine has just had a diagnosis in middle age. She had self diagnosed and was in two minds about getting a formal diagnosis but it has been a positive experience for her. She has told us that the right response for her friends is “Congratulations!” She had recently been failed by the assessors on a University course and her appeal against this on the basis that reasonable adjustments for her autism were not made was refused partly on the ground that she did not have a formal assessment. So that might be one benefit of having an assessment. Access to assessment and how it is carried out probably varies from from place to place. It seems autism is under recognised in women and girls because assessment has been based on boys and men and girls and women do not present in the same ways. I think it is useful for us all to learn more about autism because we will all know people with autism and it is easy to misinterpret other people’s behaviour and hurt them or be hurt by them.

Autism isn't a mental illness, and it can't be 'cured', although some people are very severely affected and may need ongoing help
It's just a different way of being, and covers a huge spectrum. It's also very much more common than realised.
Children with severe autism need, and receive specialist help, but those mildly affected are often not recognised, and are merely viewed as maybe a bit eccentric. My son is high-functioning Aspergers, and has felt much more comfortable with life since that was confirmed.
He gained a good degree and is head of a large design company, so he's a bright fella, but he did have problems socially, especially as a child. He often says that he recognises his own peculiarities, but being an artist, its expected that he's a little unusual.
If you are an older person and can't get access to diagnosis, there is a wealth of information online about the very many successful people who are 'on the spectrum'.
You dont need to be cured, but you have to learn self-acceptance and a certain amount of coping strategies for situations which you find particularly difficult. If you are really struggling or becoming depressed, you may be able to find NHS help, but there are some very good self-referral mental health sites online - they differ from area to area.
I wish you good luck in finding yourself - you are not wrong or ill - you just see things differently and that can be a gift.

My DGD was diagnosed at age 14 and it has been a help to everyone to know the difficulties she experiences and to make suitable allowances/changes both at home and school.

I agree Scienta!

PS Although I don't like groups I am always polite and friendly to the other Residents here, not so antisocial that I cant pass the time of day! Hopefully that makes up for not joining in.

Thank you Lady Muck, for your first post, I am also antisocial but push myself to
try and appear "normal". Reading the threads here made me wonder if I am autistic but then read your sensible post and felt reassured. Unfortunately I now live in a block of Retirement Flats where they go out for meals etc. I have a food allergy so use that as an excuse!

Piggypoo,'rituals' suggest OCD,which isnt autism,though can run alongside it or be a condition on its own.

I was 51 when I was diagnosed. I taught myself to do eye contact and learned quite a lot about body language. I also learned to pace myself with social interaction and take quiet breaks when I needed them. There isn't really any support for adults though.

Congratulations to all those who feel they might be on the spectrum but have made it thus far in life without a diagnosis.
I have dealt with children and teens on the spectrum for a long time who had similar or very different traits. As Jane 10 says, there is no cure but there are strategies for dealing with the problems it causes. For children, it can mean help or support in school and in some cases out if school, but Jane 10 knows much more about what is available for adults.
Being anxious that there is something wrong with you is a big issue and it is exacerbated by reading stuff on the internet about how others are brilliantly clever or have fantastic social lives and hundreds of friends.
Having a diagnosis for the problems you experience could be a great relief, as long as you don’t expect it to change your life. What is great is that (if you are a gran) you have raised children who have gone on to raise their own families without the support you may well have needed and deserved. Good luck with your appointment Bungalowlady.

I think Ladymuck makes a valid point. Being able to give feelings or a physical condition a cause or 'name' does make things easier to bear and that n itself can lead to a proliferation of explanations and 'names'. This is no reflection at all on the sufferers, but it would be a pity - it seems to me - if those with lighter and more manageable symptoms (sorry if not the right word) crowd out services intended for those severely affected.

2 of my granddaughters have Fragile x syndrome and autism, the elder is high functioning and to outsiders nothing appears to different about her, the younger is a whole different story. It is not always easy to understand and recognise that autistic people have a huge range of different abilities, my elder granddaughter is an amazing artist for example but can't get her head around maths whereas the younger one is gifted in maths. So really just trying to say everyone is different, having autism in the family is very challenging and the world needs to realise this and accept it.

inishowen having a name might not help, but having support and strategies to cope, could help make life a bit easier.

My daughter had to take her 8 year old to the GP to be tested for autism. It turns out she doesn't have it. However my daughter felt all the questions were relevant to her. I myself have had a difficult life with poor social skills. I once burst into tears at a dinner dance because I was overwhelmed with people and noise. Staff parties were a nightmare. I would stay in the toilet rather than go and chat. Whether my daughter and have it or not, having a name for it wouldn't help.

Bungalowlady, I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles.

I have little experience of adult autism, but a great deal of experience working with autistic children, helping them overcome barriers to learning in mainstream education and managing daily life.
The world is very challenging for these children, and I can't even begin to imagine how it challenging it must be as an adult.
Jane10 has a wealth of experience, so please take heed of what she advises.

Of course everyone is allowed to comment and give their opinion on Gransnet. However, dismissive, uninformed comments by people with no knowledge or understanding of autism are unhelpful to someone who already feels vulnerable.

Bungalowlady I do hope you manage to find the answers you seek. .

PiggyPoo because you do some rituals in your daily life does not necessarily make you autistic. Sometimes ritualistic behaviours can be a sign of OCD traits, not always, but if this is the case OCD is very treatable

Scentia, this is Gransnet!

Anyone can comment, knowledgeable or not.

Why do you feel it's 'very serious'? Autism is just being different, not a deadly fatal disease!

This thread is a hard read, I am so shocked to some people’s ‘lack of knowledge yet willingness to comment’

I wish people would stay out of very serious threads like this if they know nothing.

OP I hope you get the answers you need from your GP.

Hello, it's really hard sometimes, I asked my GP last year if I could be referred for diagnosis, at the age of 49. I was told the best way would be to go private, at the cost of at least £1000, which I couldn't afford. Also there wasn't enough "evidence" of me being arrested, or being known for strange behaviour, I was told. I was also asked if I could provide my old school reports for inspection. I had nothing like this, and certainly have never broken the law. It is on my medical file that I am "potentially Autistic". I feel that I am, as I have rituals that I have to do to feel secure. I would feel better if I had a definite diagnosis, but feel that I will never get this due to the high cost. I wish you all the best OP.

My goddaughter was diagnosed with Autism in her late twenties. Her mother and I had always thought that was the case. She also had several mental health issues so that complicated the chance of diagnosis for a long time

Jane10 how useful that you could contribute your work experience and advice rooted in that.

LadyMuck.... sorry, but you really know nothing at all about autism, so can hardly contribute in a meaningful way.

Bungalowlady you could do a lot of reading on the subject, which may help you decide if you want too take things furtther, but really as an older person who has got through life, wouldn’t just understanding yourself be enough?