BACKGROUND: It is no secret in our family that my 35 year old daughter is a very difficult person to get along with. We are a large, blended family but even as a young child she was very hard work which we put down to various things like illness, Dad's violence, etc. Despite years of Family Therapy and Counselling nothing has made a difference to her happiness levels or being able to relate to other people. When she was 17, I read a book on BPD, I was struck by the similarities and I have used some of the strategies they recommended to build a better relationship, sometimes more successfully than others. Whilst I have been reading about my Grandson's Autism, I have seen many similarities there too so, whilst not setting myself up as a mental health expert, I strongly suspect there is something in her wiring which makes her the way she is.
CURRENT SITUATION: My daughter walked in yesterday and said she has been investigating why she is the way she is and she is fairly sure that she is BPD. She doesn't think she is autistic but recognises so many of the traits of BPD so what do I think she should do.
QUESTIONS: Do other Grans out there have diagnosed BPD children in their families? If so, has being diagnosed been helpful? Has it had a negative impact in their lives? Do I encourage her to seek help (she has before but won't jump through the hoops to get seen) or do we just try to navigate it using advice from t'internet?
If you would rather not discuss this publicly, I am happy to get messages through Gransnet.
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