Did you drink without knowing you were pregnant?

Many years ago, just before Christmas, I had a pregnancy test when I suspected I might be pregnant. It came back negative so I drank (a lot) over the festive season. After New Year, and still no period, I had another test - this time positive. I lost the baby a month or so after that. I've always blamed the drinking.

Next two pregnancies were planned - I didn't touch a drop and they were both healthy children.

But monitoring a woman's drinking? Never!

In the early 1980's my brother's wife and I were both pregnant at the same time and both anaemic. We were both told by our separate doctors to drink Mackeson or Guinness. My Mother -in-law told me to put the poker in the fire to heat up then in the glass of stout to add more iron. I drank around 3 bottles a week as my husband thought it was medicinal and encouraged me! We both had normal babies. I didn't drink with my second as the taste just made me sick, as did most other things. Both my babies were approx the same weight.

grand this is nothing to do with men’s behaviour - it’s all about controlling women’s behaviour

Are they going to note too if the father-to-be smokes in the house?

Or habitually gets drunk?

An alcoholic for a parent is potentially a bigger risk to a child than his/her mother taking a glass of wine occasionally during pregnancy.

As far as I can see, nobody has explained why this information might be gathered, or to what use it might be put later on. I think it is an appalling intrusion into the rights of women to make their own decisions.

Assuming that a woman is pregnant, knows it, but still continues to drink (perhaps heavily), how far do those who support the idea of recording all alcohol consumption think that the law should be able to go?

Should the woman be imprisoned in order that her consumption can be controlled? It is likely to be too late to help the baby after it is born, but should it be taken away anyway?

What if the child is born with no obvious ill-effects? Is non-compliance reason enough for it to be taken from its mother? Who should look after the babies who have been removed from unsuitable mothers?

As for monitoring women before pregnancy even happens, given that not all pregnancies are planned, this is akin to saying that no women of childbearing age should be allowed to drink (and why not include smoking, or eating soft cheese, or all the other things that may be less than ideal - just in case?). Are people really in favour of that level of social control? Blessed are the fruit.

When I had my two babies in the late 1940,s it wasn’t known that alcohol would affect the unborn child so I had my usual drink and diet. Had two healthy babies.

I agree Mokryna , to note one drink on medical records is a gross infringement, especially before the woman realises that she is pregnant. Very different than drinking regularly throughout.

I really don't see the point of this exercise. There will be lots of 'worried well' women who will be concerned that they have inadvertently damaged their child during pregnancy, and those who don't care, despite knowing the risks that we didn't, will carry on regardless, but may lie to their health visitor thus delaying any diagnosis of problems. Load of nonsense. Far more important things to spend maternity and pre-natal budgets on.

In the 60s and 70s it was well known for woman to smoke and drink I gave up both when I got pregnant each time with my two. But did smoke again after but nor in front of the children.
At the age of 30 I gave it up and now 75 know it’s the best thing I ever done apart from having to great kids.
Sadly lost my son in 2007 but my daughter has done very well.

My daughter was still a student when she found she was pregnant. She and her boyfriend were already talking marriage and went ahead with both - the wedding was when their son was just under 2. He was 11lb 6½oz when born (she is 5’5”) and 10days late, so a huge baby and she needed a c-section. Being a student and not planning a baby, I would imagine that alcohol would be consumed before knowing! Years later they decided to have a second baby, so very much planned. Last year a second wee boy came along at 6lb 13oz. Being planned, I know for a fact that no alcohol was drunk in the year before he was conceived. There is 14yrs 8mths between the boys but with the same parents, what a difference!
With my two girls, I probably did have a drink - it wasn’t really frowned upon then, and I definitely smoked (I gave that up almost 30 years ago). My first was 7lb 13oz (it’s her 40th birthday at the end of this month) and my second was 8lb 13oz. Both healthy girls.

I went off alcohol whilst pregnant until a few weeks before I was due to give birth. I was fed up so decided to go and get some gin. It had been snowing and was icy underfoot. On the way back with 1/4 bottle gin in my pocket, I slipped and fell forward. Not wanting to land on my bump, I went down on my knees and broke the right one. I was plastered from thigh to ankle for the remainder of my pregnancy. Served me right. I did get lots of sympathy from the nurses though. People are never truthful about their alcohol intake, so it's a waste of time asking them.

We didn't drink much in the early 70s when we were building our family. Couldn't afford it then. Half a bottle of wine between us at Sunday lunch was about it. So to that extent, I did drink when pregnant. I smoked during my first pregnancy but not with my second. Both sons are now middle aged with children of their own.

I had given up smoking and drinking prior to trying to conceive. A negative test result just before a weekend away made me think I could enjoy myself for 2 days without repercussions. For almost the first time in my life, I drank more than I ever had before or since and smoked about 40 a day. The following week I felt "off colour" which I put down to too much partying at first but when I got the metallic taste in my mouth, I just knew I was pregnant. A week later I started to spot and I was hysterical at the thought I might have contributed to a miscarriage. From that moment I bargained with God to let me keep my baby and I would do everything healthily. I ended up with a boy.
Although he has turned out fine, he was the only one of mine with delayed development so I do wonder at whether the weekend blighted him with that.
I would happily give drinking details but I think it should be optional and I do think people would lie. I have a feeling that stressful pregnancies (from say, abusive home lives, depression, etc) have far more of an influence with all the negative hormones which flood the body.

Before I knew I was pregnant we had booked a holiday to Spain. In those days part of the fun was the Sangria, Cuba Libres and Red wine. When offered a drink I simply didn't want one. It tasted funny and I stuck to orange juice and lemonade the whole holiday. When we got home I had a pregnancy test and guess what!!! No idea why it happened but now I'm pleased it did.

I don’t think this is something we need get too heated about. The alcohol question is asked all the time as part of history taking so, even if not pregnant, alcohol intake, or abstinence, is already on most people’s medical records.

As for all the stories about having smoked or taken alcohol during pregnancy, I can only say that they were the lucky ones to have healthy babies. Many babies, but happily the minority, did suffer damage as a result. As soon as this was realised, the advice was changed.

Due to lockdown I decided to set up a personal bank account with a bank I already had a personal account with .I tried many times but each time they said I would receive an Identification no to continue and as I had given them my personal mobile no.and email address on the application form nothing arrived so I could not proceed and was locked out of my bank account . The local branch which they advised me to visit was closed due to Covid .When I tried to reach them by phone Iwas cut off as the automated service didn’t include a no for my problem . Feeling very frustrated I asked my husband who also has an account with the bank if he would check his emails, amazingly the bank had continually sent my I’d info to his emails on his phone .Is it really 2020 am I really expected to do everything through my husband , the banks excuse was they had sent it to my old no. This was untrue as I have only given them my latest mobile no. The bank also sent me an email to never divulge my Personal I.D no to anybody !

My kids are in their 40s. Back then we advised not to drink to excess and cut down on smoking. Not a problem for me as I didn't smoke and alcohol during pregnancy made me sick.
We weren't told any different. Consequently many babies were born with alcohol related syndromes and many thousands of babies were born underweight due to smoking. To hell with women's freedom. This is not aimed at the responsible mothers who do everything they can for the health of their babies, but at the ones who carry on regardless and put the health, or even life of their unborn children at risk.

ExD

Unfortunately medical research shows that the foetus can be affected by the mother only taking one unit of alcohol, if the mother is susceptible (and there is yet no way of knowing who is), and it is at a specific, usually very early, stage of foetal development.
It is not necessarily the heavy drinker who produces a child with FAS

Father drinking does not affect the foetus at all, although it may make conception more unlikely---but then again, not.

The effect of alcohol on the unborn child is medically proven to cause more long term damage than any other drug that the mother may take, including all illegal substances, and nicotine.

So many babies enter the foster or adoption system and their carers/parents get very little insight into things that could have affected them in utero or at a young age. For anyone who cares for a child/adult with FASD this could be the key to early detection and help. My son has FASD and will never live the same life that neurotypical adults the same age as him will, most days he wants to kill himself, he doesn’t want to live like this. His brother is unaffected by FASD...Russian roulette folks, my boy got the bullet!

Oopsminty probably by rolling up drunk at the antenatal clinic?

I drank like a fish with my first child. And smoked! I look back and shudder and thank goodness she was born fit and well and is now approaching 40.

Strangely enough she weighed more than my other two who didn't have alcohol or tobacco inflicted on them

I'm not sure how the powers that be would be aware that a woman had drunk alcohol though!

When I was pregnant in the early 70's we were encouraged to drink a glass of stout a night - wasn't keen but did it. The only reason I stopped smoking was because it made me feel sick - I started again in the hospital after my sons were born! Different times.

Surely you'd have to be drinking an awful lot, continuously, during the pregnancy to produce a baby with this condition? I can understand it must be a very upsetting thing to see - somewhat akin to being dependant on drugs I imagine, and we don't want a return to that.

But bear in mind it was (honestly) considered normal to smoke when I had my babies, we were allowed to smoke in the maternity home, and some mothers were recommended to drink stout. Those were the days when we stayed in bed for a week or even 10 days, and had salt baths to 'heal' our stitches (few people got away without the odd stitch).
So yes, we continued social drinking and thought nothing of it!
Unthinkable now.

Reminds me of my leaving 'do' when I was having first baby. I used to feel faint a lot & we all went to pub fora few drinks but I was on soft drinks. I felt odd so went outside to get some air & a couple coming in said- very loudly - look at that! And in her condition too! I wasn't up to answering back unfortunately.

Having had several children with Foetal Alcohol Syndrom living with me as Foster Children, I know at first hand the damage that alcohol can do to the unborn child. This damage can be very serious, and is always lifelong.
The mother does not have to be a heavy drinker, and yes, some are and their child are fine. Some have a few, occasional drinks, and their child is damaged.
It's a lottery, but is it worth taking that chance?