Black Dog 11

Hi all x

Have calmed down, sorry for the rant, nothing related to thread.

HVDY no work being done in the Cul de sac, they are working on a housing estate further down, no spaces there to
park the vehicles and load lorries so they are using the area next to my bungalow.

Ellie Anne please seek advice about your living conditions, living in silence with someone must be hell x

Sweetpeasue how are you today ? x

Doodle baby rice pudding? I am classing as the first rung of the ladder, next rung is porridge and the third , I am so looking
forward to cauliflower cheese, so strange after only vanilla for
.over 4 years, are you having more sleep and how are the muscles ? .x

How is everyone?

SweetpeaSue Thanks. Things are stressful for him, but when he gets his redundancy money, he might (just might) have a very small deposit to put don on a flat and perhaps get a mortgage. He's been living here for 2 years and needs his own place. GD plays football. How are you?

Anniebach Didn't any of the residents get a notification that work was going to begin?

Hi all x

Need to swear , ?. My bungalow is at the end of the Cul de sac,
To the left side is a large grassed area by my patio, opened blinds this morning and what do I see ? The large area fenced off with high wire fencing , a huge caravan sort of building, two
diggers, a lorry and van.

Made enquiries, this part of town are 3 housing estates, extensive work is to be carried out so the grassed area next to my patio is now the base for the firm carrying out the works.
I have chosen the shrubs , annuals , bench, for my patio ready to sit out there . Now I can sit there and look at all that machinery , lorries , vans, and workmen

Be back later , I will calm down.

Your poor son HVDY So very hard on a man when he can't get work. My husband made redundant about 7 yrs ago and unbelievably difficult. Managed to get v low paid part time work for few yrs but had to give that up(supermarket job) as needed 4 ops on hands due mostly to job. Your son is young and with family and it must be damaging for his self-esteem. Thank goodness you all get on together and it's great you can all do things together. I'm sure he will remember the good in this time with you and you'll become even closer. I hope he will fall lucky soon. It sounds as if it will be hard going for him for a while.
You must be so proud of your granddaughter. What sport is it she plays.? How wonderful for her.

SweetpeaSue I'm glad you managed to go to the bookclub but it's a shame you felt unwell. Hope you feel better now. I wish Son1 was settled, but sadly he has depression and anxiety just as we on here do. He's having a stressful time at present - redundant in 3 weeks, no job (he keeps applying for jobs) and still stuck living here with us. Things could be worse though

Hope everyone had a decent day. GD (10 1/2) has been chosen to represent her school by playing for Notts County under 11s reserve team, 23rd March. She's really happy about that.

Doodle Yes, it was the 1st time meeting the girlfriend. They used to work together so have known each other for 4 years, but started dating last November. He's really keen on her, and she said he's the most charismatic man she's ever known . Nice that they're happy.
Ellie Anne Has your husband always been the same? Does he chat with friends/family? He sounds very much like my brother.

NonniePicturing you getting through all that sewing! You'll be so relieved when it's finished. Thankyou for your caring.
HVDY Glad your husband is better and was able to join you all last night. So pleased that your other son is happy with his girlfriend. It makes such a difference if we know they're settled.
Annie It's great your persevering with the food. The baby rice sounds gentle and harmless. Hope it keeps agreeing with you. Thankyou for my hugs. ?
Doodle The tinnitus must be so annoying, I'm so sorry. It sounds as if you understand how to deal with it but must be difficult when you're trying to sleep. Hope I haven't made it more noticeable by just mentioning it though. Yes, I only had scan yesterday so not expecting any results yet. I hope your husband is continuing to sleep better. Been thinking about the' half empty ' thing. It's a strange one isn't it? Ive had to be' half full' person so much for my husband as he's nearly always 3/4 empty! I believe I think far too deeply.
EllieAnne You must feel so very alone. Thank goodness for your grandchildren. I hope your daughter is much better at present. You will worry about her too and it must be awful having her so very far away. Your husband sounds quite an unhappy man too but if he won't talk that's so isolating for you. I wish there was something I could suggest. Thinking of you.

Went to book club though didn't feel well and had to forego a coffee afterwards with someone who goes that is lovely. Had pain so darent eat. Easing off now though
What's happening in Ukraine is so heartbreaking and shocking. Its difficult NOT to mention it here. Please God it doesn't go on much longer. ?

HVDY sounds like you had a lovely evening. Good your DH is feeling better. Was that your first meeting with your son’s girlfriend? Good thing you like her.
Nonnie yes you do get used to tinnitus. I can forget about it for days or even weeks. If I think about it it’s there, like it is now as I’m typing but when it’s at a low level I can tune it out a bit. But sometimes it’s deafening. If I am trying to sleep and it’s really loud it becomes very annoying.
Yes I know that things going pear shaped well. You are so right.
You are getting on well with the trousers. I have a pair of DHs to do. I might tackle those tomorrow.
Sweetpeasue whatever your reasons may be for not posting don’t let it be because you think we won’t want to listen.
We are here for you.
If there was something seriously wrong your consultant would be in touch and wouldn’t let you wait ages for an appointment. If you are really anxious about it talk to your GP and explain the anxiety is causing you problems and see if they can find out the result for you.
I hope you felt better for book club.
HVDY you have a good positive approach. We all get apprehensive over test results. Like with sweetpeasue I’m sure they would be in touch early if they had cause for concern.
Annie I used to like the baby food. I would think baby rice and porridge the right place to start. Are you feeeling any stronger?
Ellie Anne sounds like your husband doesn’t have much empathy with others and isn’t particularly interested in anything. Do you think he’s happy just going on the same way and doing what he wants when he wants?
Must be hard to live with someone who shows no interest.

I don’t think there was any mental illness in his family. He’s quite prejudiced about some things. Used to refer to homosexuals as poofters and has no compassion for people suffering from addiction.and has no time for any religious faith.
He is not passionate about anything. Likes watching most sports and plays golf occasionally.
I do most things around the house. He gets his own breakfast and lunch but I make his evening meal. He will do a things around house if she’d but doesn’t see what needs done.
Doesn’t touch the garden.
Sorry for the long message but you did ask!

Anniebach I'm well, thanks. My "get up and go" isn't always there. I try to get on with things as best as I can, as we all do. Each time a problem arises, I think "Something else to have to deal with" but there are people all over the world (Russia at the moment is at the fore) going through such awful suffering, so I know I'm extremely fortunate in my life. I really do wish you well with your eating problems. How are you with scrambled egg or perhaps pasta? x

Hi all x

Nonnie thank you for explaining ‘half empty people’, I doubt
your interviewing applicants wasn’t within the police special branch, my Mini Tornado finds she learns from interviews, it isn’t work where details are given when a job becomes available. Hope you are still testing negative x

Sweetpea you trust was shattered, I believe broken trust is so
difficult to mend but it can be done. Sending you hugs x

HVDY how are you ? I have so much admiration for your
‘Get up and go’ x

Nellie Anne perhaps your husband has a fear of mental health illnesses, anyone in his family had such ? x

Joyce if you check in remember we are here for you x

Scaredycat hope you are having a great holiday x

Doodle sending hugs x

I am working on my change of eating, now eating Heinz Baby
Rice, next on the list is porridge, ! ?

How is everyone?

Sweetpeasue It's easy to worry about things that are out of our control, and quite understandable. Scan results are taking ages to come through, I suppose it's the same everywhere - I had to wait 8 weeks for the result of my brain MRI. Like you, I've been thinking of the "what ifs" but really, it doesn't do any good to get anxious. I keep telling myself that of course this tumour isn't cancerous - I've told people it's benign but I haven't been told that, as there's no point in thinking the worst. If you can, try to plan some nice things to do over the weekend, to give you something good to look forward to. x

Meant when Gynaecologist saw me couple of weeks ago didn't seem bothered. He said at the time to make appt with him in a couple of months but I can't wait all that time for scan results. I expect he didn't think I'd get scan so quick. Oh dear, sorry.

In 2 minds if should post this morning. Feeling v anxious. Have had some pain before loo and feeling
sick though seems not too bad now. Keep thinking that radiologist said viewing left ovary was difficult so had to keep pushing it and other nurse pressing on outside of tummy, resulting in period like pain afterwards. Could there be growth or something? Gynaecologist so glad I'd stopped bleeding wasn't bothered about the ultrasound he'd promised me at first. Think he wants rid of me. Lots of people to see so understandable. Probs looks upon me as problem patient after my formal complaints at other hospital.
Not sure if I should go to book group this afternoon. Still feel bowel churning and bit sick. Anxiety taking over. Worried during night I have something bad. Sorry everyone.

Annie a couple of people said they are 'half empty' people which is why I made the comment. We are all different.

Doodle glad you are feeling better. I think tinnitus must be very wearing, do you get used to it? Would drive me potty.

HVDY you and Doodle have both made me smile, you at the thought of DH sewing and her at the thought of him clearing up afterwards. He does but when he is not here I give the kitchen a good clean and he doesn't know I've done it!

SweatpeaSue so glad it wasn't as bad as expected, when do you get the results?

Anyone else notice that when we get all worked up about something and overthink it, it goes smoothly but when we think something is going to be simple it all goes pear shaped?

Did another pair of trousers yesterday, one pair to go!

Coping a bit better now and still don't have Covid.

Sweetpeasue Glad you got on alright. That's over with now, so hopefully, you'll get sorted.

Hope everyone's had a peaceful evening. Just got in from having a very nice meal at the Indian restaurant then drinks at the pub nearby. DH managed alright, no further stomach upsets, so he'll probably go to work tomorrow. Good to meet Son2's girlfriend. She's lovely and very good-looking. Nice to see him so happy. Just need the same for Son1 now.......
Goodnight all x

Well done Sweetpeasue that’s another thing done. Hope you get some sleep tonight and are less anxious.

Back. Really not too bad. Caused some pain when trying to view left ovary as one nurse pushed down timmy at same time and transducer pushed into where ovary was, so bit like period pain at present but really nothing like I was imagining.
Hope you all OK. Have a nice family night HVDY.
A peaceful night to all.

Doodle Glad you're feeling a bit better. Tinnitus is a nuisance - I've had it for about 14 years, it's there 24/7 but most of the time I can ignore it. Silence makes it more noticeable. I'm going out with son1 and an old school friend of both sons. We're meeting son2 and his girlfriend (1st time of meeting her) I told DH that if he's not going, I'll have to eat twice as much .
Anniebach That's a lot to pay out. Cars are convenient but expensive to run. x
Nonnie I got DH to thread my needle. He ended up doing the sewing too . Just a torn lining of the sleeve in GD1s coat that she's got here.
Sweetpeasue Best of luck for 4pm. Hope everything goes well.

Just did aqua aerobics then a bit of shopping. Going to "do my roots" soon and see what I can wear later - our washer must be faulty, all my clothes are too small . All this weight I've gained- I must start a diet tomorrow. Hope everyone is enjoying a bit of sunshine today, it's glorious here. x

Morning all…well just about.
Thank you for your kind wishes. I had a good sleep and feel better this morning. Aches not so bad and tinnitus back to its normal level and hearing restored.
Annie I take it you will be helping MT with her gearbox problem. Hope she is lucky with a new job soon.
Nonnie I would rather be more positive like you than negative like me. I don’t think we can change our inbuilt characteristics though.
Shame you have to stay in but good of you to keep others safe just in case.
Ellie Anne I think all of us on this thread wish we could help you in some way. If others have suggested your husband might be ASD too then it is a possibility in which case his lack of interest in family may be something he has no control over. Does he have any passions in life, hobbies or things that appear to make him more animated?
Do you do a lot round the house for him, does he cook for himself or clear up?
HVDY kind of you to say but I just potter along links the rest of us. Have you thought of buying an old fashioned needle threader. I’ve got one and it helps me.
Your aqua aerobics followed by a chat with a friend sounds like a good thing to do often.
Hope your DH feels better soon. No I don’t think an meal out tonight would be a good idea, he’s obviously not feeling well.
Are you meeting up with someone? Hope you get to go even if DH isn’t up to it.
Annie that’s a good idea. A counsellor may well be able to help Ellie Anne towards a brighter future.
Wow that is an expensive bill. Would MTs father help out a bit too?
I think Nonnie mentioned half empty people as I said I was one. I am always on the pessimistic side not the optimist. Luckily Nonnie is more positive.
Nonnie I am no better at coping than anyone on this thread.
When things are going ok I am fine but as soon as I start being anxious about family I come here looking for support too. It’s how I met dear Annie who has been so kind to me.
Hope you find things to keep you occupied while you are stuck in.
Sweetpeasue a big hug from me for a start. Please try and think of these investigations as a positive step towards finding out what’s wrong. I know because of your past experiences it’s difficult to trust the doctors but the sooner they find out what’s causing your troubles the quicker you can be helped.
I hope the ultrasound doesn’t upset your bowel. I have had a couple and they don’t seem too bad. Mention it to the scanner and ask them to be careful. We are all with you, thinking of you .let us know how you get on.
Take care all x

NonnieHope you are still free of covid symptoms.
Doodle so sorry to hear you're not well. Take care of yourself and rest. Horrid feeling nauseous.
HVDY Oh dear, hope you don't get it too! Indian meal? Think not.
EllieAnne I'm so sorry about your circumstances. Sounds utterly miserable and very isolating. Does your friend have any helpful advice?
I think HVDY and Annie's idea to talk to someone is perhaps the only thing left. I do feel for you.
Annie You seem to get setback after setback. So frustrating for you and MT. Price for gearbox sounds so much.
Everyone with own problems so will be brief. Spoke to GP yesterday. Thinks possibility of blockage( what type might that be?) Scared. She's writing to Gastroenterologist who initiated scan to try hurry things up I think. Got call from hospital to go for Gynae vag ultrasound, today at 4! Scared as have low pain and don't want bowel to play up. Probs won't eat anything lunchtime. V tired of everything. Group hugs all round?

Ellie Anne I have no experience of someone like that but it must be very hard to live with such an unhappy man. I wonder if he is scared of being diagnosed and asking for help. You will always worry about your daughter.

HVDY I agree about Doodle, she is the sort of person I wish lived near me so we could meet up, sure she would sort me out.

Only did one pair, sewing black on black was too straining. Still got another pair of black and one very dark blue to do. Just about threaded the needle but it took me ages.

It sounds like you keep yourself busy and healthy. Good for you, keep telling us it might motivate.

Doodle that is not like you, hope you have recovered now.

Beautiful day here but will stay in and look at it from inside.

Annie been thinking about MT. No knowledge of her 'specialist subject' so just thinking in general but is there any course she could take which would complement her degree? Something which would show versatility? Widen her horizons? I have done a lot of recruiting and always looked at the 'extras' a person had done. I never interviewed anyone who didn't have the necessary experience or anyone over qualified because it wasted everyone's time. Initiative and proactivity always got my attention.

Hi all x

Doodle. Perhaps a visit to your GP ? Sending you hugs x

Ellie Anne you need to speak to a counsellor, someone who
can advise and support you to move on from the misery you are living in, do you want to leave your husband? We are here
for you x

HVDY you didn’t moan yesterday, talking about what we feel
isn’t moaning, it’s sharing, you do so much to come back from
the stroke, for you a ? x
Mini Tornado has been told car repairs £1,400 ! So no new sofa or garden tap for me for a while x

Nonnie I am puzzled why you referred to ‘you half empty people’, !

How is everyone?

It's a bright and sunny but cold morning. My husband hasn't gone to work, so I've been out and got Immodium - we'll see how that goes. Not sure it's wise for him to go to the Indian restaurant tonight . Hope everyone in the gang is Ok. x

Doodle Sorry you feel rough. Feeling nauseous is unpleasant. Hope you soon feel better. x

Hope everyone has a restful evening x