Black Dog 11

Annie how wonderful, are you exhausted or energised by such a lovely visit?

Doors, yes please!

HDVY it sounds as if you are doing everything positive, go for it. Even if it feels a bit slow you will meet people who share your frustration.

I understand about the memories of that room affecting you but, in my experience, it can be overcome. When the Compassionate Friends restarted meetings after the worst of Covid, it was in a hall we used to take DS to several times a week so we went through awful emotions (in case you don't know he died suddenly for no reason). It was hard but now we feel we can go although it is a shock each time.

Today I am on automatic pilot, nothing bad but nothing good, just keeping on keeping on

Doodle I think my digestion needs discipline! I put on weight over Christmas and am now at the very top of normal BMI. I probably deserve indigestions.

Sweatpeasue don't feel anxious or guilty, all that matters is that your motivation is good. Maybe you needed to draw attention to yourself? Sometimes we are so hell bent on helping others we forget self care.

Scardycat I love snowdrops. When I was matron of honour the bride said I could choose my own flowers so I had an enormous bunch of snowdrops, she said she preferred mine to her own!

Violet Sky do you live in the UK? 'Without a coat' braver than me¬

Hi all x

VioletSky I have used a light box, before light lamps , take care. I will come back here later today, if the weather is bad and
you can’t go out , stand at an open door for 20 minutes a couple of times a day so daylight can reach the back of your eyes. x

Friends, the doors are being fitted, I had a disturbed nights sleep, I now will have to start facing the outside world after 5 years. Frightening thought .

How is everyone?

Sweetpeasue I hope that being supportive of me hasn't made you feel bad. I enjoyed the Aqua Aerobics, but not the Strokeability (I probably won't go again). It's too slow for me. Also, the room we were in was where I used to go for Zumba with my friend (she stopped being a friend when I had my stroke, and I miss her).

Doodle Do you walk far? I ought to really. Since I've been able to drive again (end of Nov) I've become lazy again.

Scaredycat It was good at Aqua Aerobics - then we went across the road and I had pancakes with Maple syrup, my friend had a full English breakfast with chips and toast!

Annibach, Violetsky, Nonnie - hope you've all had good weather where you are.
Love to all x

Joce thank you for sharing

Hope everyone has had a bit of sunshine today, it was lovely being on the playground without a coat.

Has anyone tried a SAD lamp?

Joce- what a lovely poem - made me feel better about myself- thank you.
Annie- so glad your grandchildren came to see you - a special day too. Everything crossed for the doors tomorrow..
I thought of you on our walk today- we saw the first snowdrops- they are so pretty.
Nonnie- what a great driving record you have . I,ve been done for speeding twice- both overseas!! Once approaching a border crossing too fast and once just going to the Supermarket . This was before I became so fearful. It was so much easier though as you paid the fine and that was that.
HVDY- Aqua Aerobics is a fun way to get fit especially going with your friend. A good few years ago I went with my friend and we used to laugh so much especially when they got those woggles out?
Yes it’s like Spring here too .n
Doodle- hope you enjoyed your walk in the sun. It is definitely warmer than it was yesterday.
VioletSky and SweetpeaSue- hope the sun is shining on you too today.

Sweetpeasue never, ever feel guilt for what you say or how many times you say it, bumping up your original thread was a kindness, you were being supportive which is so important on
Black Dog. time can heal x

I have lost count of the times I have posted about my new doors, think since last Summer, if not the doors then my iPad
playing up or ‘it’s raining in Mid Wales ‘ .

Thankyou to all who've asked after me.
Anniebach Do hope you get the work done on your doors tomorrow, then you can get into your garden anytime you feel.
Glad you've had a nice morning with your friend HVDY. Hope the Strokeability class goes well for you.
Feeling quite anxious and guilty that in bumping my original thread up for HVDY to make it easier to access for her I appear to have brought more questions. I wrote too much at the time and now I've drawn attention to myself. It's made me realise though, that time has brought a certain amount of acceptance.

Violetsky and Sweetpeasue hope you’re having a better day today and some sunshine where you are too.

Hello Joce. What a great poem. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Nonnie hope that GP phones soon. Taking meds that’s don’t agree with you can cause all sorts of problems. Sorry about your indigestion. Have you tried a bland diet for a few days to see if it settles?
I think it is quite easy to drive over the limit especially when it’s not that much over. A moments distraction is all it takes. Oh well, at least you feel you have gained something from it.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. We can all make mistakes. I’m sure I’ve done the same before just not been caught.
Annie a family visit how lovely. Nice to see all of them together. That must have lifted your spirits. I’ve been thinking about the doors and have everything crossed for tomorrow. Please let it happen this time.
HVDyou do you enjoy the aqua aerobics. They say it’s really good exercise and doing it in water saves your joints a bit.
DH went to a rehabilitation class after his bypass but they wouldn’t let him do anything as his BP was too high.
Yes we have sunshine here too. Just off for a walk. I bet it’s not as warm as it looks. ?
Have a good day all x

hello all, how are you all today? I went to Aqua Aerobics with my friend from my street, then we had a snack in a cafe. I'm going to a different leisure centre later, for Strokeability. I'm not sure it's for me, but I'll see how it goes (2nd time there, it seemed too slow for me).

Anniebach That was lovely for you to have a chat with your family. x
Nonnie I did a speed awareness course, October before last. There are lots of us about . It's easy to go a few miles over the limit without realising, until it's too late

I hope everyone is enjoying the sunshine today - it's like spring here!

Hi all x

Joyce great poem, thank you x

Nonnie the naughty step ? ? x

My Mini Tornado came to see me yesterday, and my elder granddaughter and grandson, wonderful to see and talk with them , it was elder granddaughter’s birthday

Will know later today if new doors will be fitted tomorrow, so
am wading through my gardening books .

How is everyone?

VioletSky you are not alone, we understand.

Sweetpeasue Welcome. Hope we can help. Thyroid issues are notoriously difficult to sort out.

Scardycat good point to remind us all we need to love ourselves too.

The walking is good for your physical health as well. You put me to shame.

Yes, that fear of everything, how do we stop it?

Doodle pharmacist said she will put a not on for the GP so if he doesn't call in a couple of weeks I will call him. Also seem to be getting indigestion a lot but maybe it is because of the Christmas eating and all the chocs!

Joce thanks for that, these reminders are always good.

I was up early this morning for a Zoom course, yes, guilty, it was a speed awareness course. I was doing 37 in a 30 road. The only thing I learned was that I could have been driving faster in country roads and dual carriageways but it was till useful. For me getting the letter saying I had been speeding was enough punishment, I had no idea as I always thought I was a cautious driver. I had clearly become complacent driving in my local area. The shock is that it was in a road I frequently walk and notice speeding drivers and I had seen the police vans on the day! Been driving for 50 years, only two accidents and they were clearly the fault of others. Even more ashamed as I was the only woman on the course. A couple of the men had done this course before (one three times!) and one had previously been sent on a driving course by his employer because he had points on his license.

Thoroughly ashamed of myself

Morning all you lovely caring people in the BDG..
Annie Doodle Nonnie scaredy-cat all that know me.. welcome to all that I’ve not met...
I’m still hear and plodding on on...
I saw this poem and thought of you all..
Hope you all have a peaceful day today ?

Violetsky it is difficult when there is no one who can help out. Glad you are a bit better today. We may not have all the answers here but we are always ready to listen so post whenever you want someone to chat to. Hope you have a good night.

Doodle we don't have any family support nearby sadly, and with covid, I have an email for the consultants secretary and I have only seen him twice. When thyroid is in normal range any symptoms don't seem to matter. I am recovering slowly as none of it was discovered until a lot of damage was done.

I've managed to pick myself up a bit today, achieved a few things which helps

Violetsky could your family help with your dependent children if you needed treatment for your thyroid?
If you’re worried about surgery for Graves’ disease and the support groups don’t help could you try asking more questions of your consultant. Sometimes writing down what you are worried about and sending them an email can enable you to get answers to questions. My DH did that when he had concerns about his blood cancer.
Scaredycat sorry about the troublesome AF. At least you are going out walking and trying your best to overcome the anxiety. Glad your sister is doing better.
Annie Hope your visitors came and you had a good time.
Hope all of you including Violetsky and Sweetpeasue have a peaceful night.

Goodness, a lot going on here today. Welcome all.
Annie your tales of MT and Edgar made me laugh. How lovely she treasures your gift.
Nonnie hope you get your meds sorted out soon. Is it worth talking to the GP about it and finding an alternative?
Violetsky of course we don’t mind you joining in. It’s what we are here for. We all know about depression and anxiety on here also trying to hide how we feel from others, you can always come in here and tell us how you’re feeling.
Sweetpeasue no need to be afraid to post here. We are not like other threads. No one will judge you or criticise you.
Nice of you to offer support to HVDY

Rafichagran- good to hear from you. I do hope that horrible feeling will soon pass.
Doodle- time goes by so fast doesn’t it. My eldest GD is 36 this year !! We have 7 Grandaughter so are very lucky. I hope yours loves her present it sounds like fun.
EllieAnne- I,m sure we have all felt as you are feeling at the moment- I know I have. You obviously love your children and they know you are there for them always but you need to love yourself as well. Try and get out as much as possible it really
does help.
Annie- so pleased you will see your Grandaughters today and hope you have a day full of love and laughter.
At the moment AF is a very frequent visitor but I need to walk for my mental health so off I go as often as possible.
Nonnie- Scary to hear that about your medication- I don’t like taking my meds but would be in trouble if I didn’t. Hope it’s one you don’t need too often.
VioletSky- you are not alone .
SweetpeaSue- I hope you get some comfort here

Facetimed with my sister this morning - she is doing so well and getting out and about more now. Just want her to keep safe though. I have fear about everything .
Love to allx

Violetsky Thankyou for your kind concern. Yes, Pals were involved a couple of times but what they do is limited and they suggested that I write a formal complaint, which I did though the investigations were completely unsatisfactory. My full story is under 'Botched Procedure' Very rough heading, I know, but I wanted to draw attention at the time to get in contact with others.
I'm so sorry for how you are feeling. I have only just posted on this thread myself. I hope your own health issues can be addressed and you can get some relief soon.

Anniebach Hope you enjoy your visit. x
Sweetpeasue Thanks. You've had a terrible ordeal. I understand exactly what you mean about them closing ranks. They did the same with me, they all cover up for each other.

Anniebach yes, there are 2 options, radioactive iodine or removal. I've already said no to radioactive iodine because I couldn't then be around my children for 2 weeks and 3 of the 5 are still dependant and one is autistic and wouldn't cope.

I have tried graves support groups but I think that mostly people post when they are suffering and need support so I've become really worried about surgery after reading people's struggles

VioletSky I know little about Graves’ disease but I do know it
causes depression and anxiety.

May I ask about removal of your thyroid? does this cause you
fear ?

Sorry, Anniebach. Taken med for palpitations.

Sweetpeasue welcome , still not received counselling, so wrong .

We are here for you, write when you feel ready to my love x

Thank you Anniebach I have depression and anxiety and graves disease that doesn't help by mucking up my hormones driven by a bonkers thyroid, thankfully mostly managed by medication in the last several months. I'm wondering now if they will want to remove it soon as I am nearing the time limit without going into remission.

sweetpeasue I'm sorry to hear this, have you contacted PALs? I hope you get the answers and support you need