Parkinson’s driving dilemma

I asked my DH’s Parkinson’s consultant to assess his fitness to drive when I knew that he, an excellent driver, was no longer safe because he couldn’t make decisions quickly. She told him he could drive home but that was it, and he accepted it from her. It was a very sad day for him but he would have caused an accident and would have hated that. I told him I admired him for accepting the inevitable and was proud that he had an unblemished licence for over 60 years. Hope I will handle the situation as well when the time comes.

Ali23, I agree, its a difficult one. I hope things work out ok for everyone involved.

Thanks for all of your replies. It’s true that this dilemma is one that many people face for different reasons. I have 2 brothers in law with dementia. One gave up driving of his own accord. One had to have the keys hidden, the car sold and he still believes he could drive if he needed to. I suppose it’s all down to insight, or lack of it.
I must say that 3 years is a long time when you have PD. My neighbour has deteriorated so much in the last 3 years. So sad.

He is seriously trying to get his car MOTd so that he can resume driving. But you are right. He is only stating an intention at the moment.

I’ve decided to make sure that his relatives know what he’s saying, inform them of my worries, and let them handle it at this stage. But if he actually did drive, I would feel duty bound to go further. It’s not just his safety, it’s his wife and any unfortunate person who he collides with.

Years

Jaylou I corrected this in a slightly later post. It is every 3 Yeats.

My sister in law was reported by someone who saw her attempting to park in a small, local town. The police came and took her keys off her after they had assessed her mental state.

I am ashamed, in retrospect that no family members hid the keys and reported her. It is too easy ro take the easy option and let people who shouldn't keep driving.

25Avalon

How old is he? Over 70 and the licence has to be renewed each year. DVLA list a number of conditions that if you have you are not allowed to drive and you sign a declaration to that effect.

If you speak to the wife she can ask their GP to have a word with him as well.

The gov website mentions that over 70's licences are renewed ever 3 years not every year. Their backlog would be even worse if it was every year

A question for anyone here - how would you feel if you received notification from DVLA advising that they were concerned about your ability to drive and that you had to complete forms/tests/provide medical records etc? You might not know WHO had reported you but would know it was someone close either family friend or neighbours. And no one had mentioned it to you previously that it might be an idea to stop driving?

If I believed I was still driving competently, I'd hope to demonstrate that in whatever way was asked.
If the fact was that I was unaware of driving badly, I might also have disregarded suggestions to stop.

I'm saying now that I'd want to be prevented from driving badly at a future time, if that became necessary.
My hurt feelings wouldn't be important.

kittylester

Baggytrazzas

Hi, there seems to be an awful tendency for lots of people on gransnet to want to report others, or encourage others to report. What is it that would be reported here?

As far as I am aware, it is not a crime to say that you want to drive again.

Ali23, would it be possible for you to download information from the DVLA site that covers the requirements for drivers in respect of age and illness related conditions, including the additional driving test that is sometimes required to establish fitness to drive, and pass this to the man? Or maybe fnd a leaflet at the gp surgery or library and pass that to him? I think that would be a really helpful thing for you to do.

I'm also not really in agreement with involving his wife at this point unless he has obvious mental incapacity issues and cannot follow a conversation on his own. In which case you could mention that he had told you this recently and thought it would be helpful to pass on the information/ leaflet.

I hope that this might help solve the current dilemma.

Because we all have a responsibility to stop people who are dangerous drivers.

Oh for goodness sake, this person IS NOT DRIVING. He has merely said that he is going to start driving again. So by reporting him at this point for THINKING about driving again is not going to stop people who are dangerous drivers. He might be perfectly capable, or may change his mind and not drive but at present there is no crime in only thinking about it.

FarNorth - yes, lots of GPs tend to avoid becoming involved in this.

If he look as though he was both going to drive and was incapable then Aggie and some of the others have got it spot on - lose the keys.

Sparklefizz

Baggytrazzas

Sparklefizz

A friend was worried about her father's driving. He was in his 80s and determined to continue. His GP would do nothing, so she reported him anonymously herself. She felt awful doing it but he was a menace on the roads and liable to kill others and himself.

Hi, and what investigations took place and how long did it take before he stopped driving? There would have been requests for forms, medical reports etc meanwhile he would still be driving.

If anyone is genuinely worried about anyone else's ability to drive then best and immediate thing would be to "mislay" the car keys until the medical assessment takes place or the would be driver agrees they are no longer fit to drive.

Baggy I only know what my friend told me, but what I do know is that he had a number of serious health conditions and was driving very erratically.

You seem to be implying that she reported him maliciously which could not be further from the truth. She agonised over doing it but knew he was an "accident waiting to happen".

HI, I'm not implying that she reported him maliciously. I'm saying though that people COULD submit malicious reports. It probably took some time between the reporting and when he stopped driving permanently. It might have been better to have considered other actions to take.

A question for anyone here - how would you feel if you received notification from DVLA advising that they were concerned about your ability to drive and that you had to complete forms/tests/provide medical records etc? You might not know WHO had reported you but would know it was someone close either family friend or neighbours. And no one had mentioned it to you previously that it might be an idea to stop driving?

Baggytrazzas

Sparklefizz

A friend was worried about her father's driving. He was in his 80s and determined to continue. His GP would do nothing, so she reported him anonymously herself. She felt awful doing it but he was a menace on the roads and liable to kill others and himself.

Hi, and what investigations took place and how long did it take before he stopped driving? There would have been requests for forms, medical reports etc meanwhile he would still be driving.

If anyone is genuinely worried about anyone else's ability to drive then best and immediate thing would be to "mislay" the car keys until the medical assessment takes place or the would be driver agrees they are no longer fit to drive.

Baggy I only know what my friend told me, but what I do know is that he had a number of serious health conditions and was driving very erratically.

You seem to be implying that she reported him maliciously which could not be further from the truth. She agonised over doing it but knew he was an "accident waiting to happen".

Baggytrazzas

Hi, there seems to be an awful tendency for lots of people on gransnet to want to report others, or encourage others to report. What is it that would be reported here?

As far as I am aware, it is not a crime to say that you want to drive again.

Ali23, would it be possible for you to download information from the DVLA site that covers the requirements for drivers in respect of age and illness related conditions, including the additional driving test that is sometimes required to establish fitness to drive, and pass this to the man? Or maybe fnd a leaflet at the gp surgery or library and pass that to him? I think that would be a really helpful thing for you to do.

I'm also not really in agreement with involving his wife at this point unless he has obvious mental incapacity issues and cannot follow a conversation on his own. In which case you could mention that he had told you this recently and thought it would be helpful to pass on the information/ leaflet.

I hope that this might help solve the current dilemma.

Because we all have a responsibility to stop people who are dangerous drivers.

aggie are you saying the doctor knew of the danger and did nothing?

Huh ! Ask the Doctor ! My OH had PD but drove at speed , he was a very slow driver before the onset ! ,
I pocketed the keys , the safe had been lost ages before , initially he asked where were the keys , I said I hadn’t seen them , he wandered off , asked a few more times , but forgot all about it , a different mania took over
I hid them in my dressing gown pocket and neither he nor anyone else thought of looking there

Ask his wife if they see in Parkinson's related doctors or nurses on a regular basis then perhaps you can encourage them to discuss it with them , she could bring it up by saying something like " x is thinking about starting to drive again" and perhaps the conversation can be opened up that way. They can then get the appropriate advise.

BlueBelle

*Hi, there seems to be an awful tendency for lots of people on gransnet to want to report others, or encourage others to report. What is it that would be reported here*

If the man starts driving again and has advanced Parkinson’s what would you think is the right thing to do ? You can’t mislay his keys if he’s a neighbour !!! ?‍?

I don’t understand your post I ve never reported anyone in my life but if I knew someone was putting himself and others in danger I wouldn’t think twice and hopefully nor would any other person who was caring

Also, in my earlier post, I pointed out that at this stage the man is not driving, he has only mentioned that he intends to. He might only be saying that. For all we know he may already be revoked and his wife may already have "lost" the car keys. My point is that its not a crime for anyone to SAY they intend driving.

BlueBelle

*Hi, there seems to be an awful tendency for lots of people on gransnet to want to report others, or encourage others to report. What is it that would be reported here*

If the man starts driving again and has advanced Parkinson’s what would you think is the right thing to do ? You can’t mislay his keys if he’s a neighbour !!! ?‍?

I don’t understand your post I ve never reported anyone in my life but if I knew someone was putting himself and others in danger I wouldn’t think twice and hopefully nor would any other person who was caring

Hi, yes I too am confused by the " reporting" aspects here. If anyone reports that someone else is unfit to drive to the DVLA, either the DVLA will already be aware of the position OR will need to begin an investigation which could take weeks or months. They can't simply take anyones word for it ( unless they are the persons GP) - it could be malicious. meanwhile the person is still driving whether unfit or not. So, the first resort should, in my opinion, not be " reporting" but considering what others actions might be more helpful. And whilst you can't mislay a neighbours keys, in this case his wife could. There are other ways of dealing with the matter at least initially apart from " reporting" .

Hi, there seems to be an awful tendency for lots of people on gransnet to want to report others, or encourage others to report. What is it that would be reported here

If the man starts driving again and has advanced Parkinson’s what would you think is the right thing to do ? You can’t mislay his keys if he’s a neighbour !!! ?‍?

I don’t understand your post I ve never reported anyone in my life but if I knew someone was putting himself and others in danger I wouldn’t think twice and hopefully nor would any other person who was caring

We removed my Mum’s car keys as her dementia took hold and in conjunction with her GP notified DVLA. She wasn’t best pleased, but needs must.
DVLA have medical advisors to ring if there is uncertainty.

Sparklefizz

A friend was worried about her father's driving. He was in his 80s and determined to continue. His GP would do nothing, so she reported him anonymously herself. She felt awful doing it but he was a menace on the roads and liable to kill others and himself.

Hi, and what investigations took place and how long did it take before he stopped driving? There would have been requests for forms, medical reports etc meanwhile he would still be driving.

If anyone is genuinely worried about anyone else's ability to drive then best and immediate thing would be to "mislay" the car keys until the medical assessment takes place or the would be driver agrees they are no longer fit to drive.

I would hate to have to stop driving but I hope that others would make me do so, if I became a risk and didn't realise it.

there seems to be an awful tendency for lots of people on gransnet to want to report others, or encourage others to report. What is it that would be reported here?

What would be reported is the man's medical condition making it dangerous for him to drive.

Why is it to be left to someone whose judgement is faulty, to decide whether to endanger others?

Is it really the case that GPs stand back and do nothing if they know someone is unfit to drive?

A friend was worried about her father's driving. He was in his 80s and determined to continue. His GP would do nothing, so she reported him anonymously herself. She felt awful doing it but he was a menace on the roads and liable to kill others and himself.

You are welcome and good luck Ali23

Hi everyone
Thanks for the replies. Yes he has declared his PD to the DVLA in the past but he was actually capable then. He runs his wife around in impossible circles and it’s entirely possible that this is one of them. She was there during the conversation.

I will take her to one side if I can though, and talk to her about it.

It’s a good idea to print out the information and share it with them. Thanks for that idea Baggytrazzas. His wife doesn’t read well but she might feel able to share it with her son.

Thanks again.