Assisted dying: Parliamentary public consultstion

Caleo

My book that I bought from Exit gives exact details on which drugs and the proper dose. You can get the book after you have belonged to Exit for a short period. I am not saying it's easy to put an end to oneself, but there are ways and means that make it a little easier.

Caleo Thank you for that information…have pm’d you…

Still calling me smug volver. How can saying I would take such drastic action in certain circumstances possibly be smug?

My book that I bought from Exit gives exact details on which drugs and the proper dose. You can get the book after you have belonged to Exit for a short period. I am not saying it's easy to put an end to oneself, but there are ways and means that make it a little easier.

You may have read my post. Beyond that, it isn’t appropriate to give out the sort of information you ask for. When this subject came up on a thread some time ago I had someone send me a PM asking the same question. I didn’t reply, nor would I.

Shinamae, besides your "stash of sleeping pills" please make sure you also have anti-nausea drugs. Taking a lot of sleeping pills may make you vomit, otherwise.

Delila

*Volver*, I don’t regard the handful of pills situation as smug - I’d just like to ask “which pills?”

I have derailed this thread, sorry. Last comment from me.

But the smugness comes when people say "You just have to plan ahead" or "as soon as I have a diagnosis I'll be taking the pills."

Its so simple, isn't it? Apparently. 😡 No nuance. None at all.

Yes, Fleurpepper, I appreciate that, but people sound very confident about being prepared with pills and I wonder which ones, and how they can be so confident about their effectiveness.

GN or the Internet is not the place for this. It is illegal to give advice on methods, etc. Anyone interested will have to do their own research, for obvious reasons.

Volver, I don’t regard the handful of pills situation as smug - I’d just like to ask “which pills?”

Shinamae

volver

Gosh, "Still Alice" was on a whole different thread.

Sorry. I should pay more attention!

Was it?I never realised I will go and look for it….🤓

Had a good look and just can’t find a thread about the film “Still Alice”…🤷‍♀️

volver

Gosh, "Still Alice" was on a whole different thread.

Sorry. I should pay more attention!

Was it?I never realised I will go and look for it….🤓

Thanks. I filled in the survey. I think it's very important the religious fanatics don't get to undermine this consultation.

Gosh, "Still Alice" was on a whole different thread.

Sorry. I should pay more attention!

volver

Somebody mentioned "Still Alice" upthread.

Those of you who have seen it will remember that "reaching for the pills" isn't quite as simple as you might think.

To be honest, I hadn't thought of the live in care Fleurpepper. Unfortunately for someone who had lived in a one bedroom flat for 50 years "live in care" isn't the option you think it is.

Oh I understand Volver. I have been there, done that, with my parents, OH's mother, and many others. Once you are in the late and emergency phase, it is too late to organise. I tried to persuade my parents to get their house organised with walk-in shower, ramps, holding rails- but the reply was always 'good idea but there is plenty of time for that' ... but as I expected, the time came much quicker, and it was too late to organise. In their case, their next door neighbour, who was a cleaner but previously an experienced carer- was prepared to give up her cleaning jobs and become full-time carer. EG come in morning to get mum up, washed and ready, help with getting meals, and pop in any time required + in the evening to get mum ready for bed. As said, due to my (lovely) dad's stubborness- when the time came, there was no choice but to go to care home for mum.

Which has made us VERY determined that we should get everything as ready as possible in our house, to make life easier. We have a room which can become a bedroom downstairs, and plans for a shower-room, and also stair-lift if necessary. And to separate our accom. so we can have a live-in care giver. We also have a neighbour who has the skills and said she would give up her other jobs to become full-time carer, if and when.

So believe me, NO criticism from me Volver. You did you very best (and yes, we all feel that we could possible have done more- that's the nature of being a daughter)...

But, as said above, witnessing not only my parents, but so many more, friends and also through my OH's job- we are determined to try to organise early to ensure we can stay at home, as long and possible. And to have choices for the next stage. I will not ever put my own ACs through all this. They are fully on board and understand exactly what our choices are.

Alzheimers/dementia is very different. Again, with all the experience we have gathered over the years- we know that a very early decision has to be made. As too late is ... too late.

One of our very best friends had a massive stroke a few months ago. He was not found for 3 days- and is now totally dependent, and totally unable to communicate. No-one knows if and what he does comprehend- so he has NO choice- apart from DNR. We have been so shocked by this- all of us, his friends- and there is nothing we can do. That is the true nightmare scenario for which an advanced directive, apart from DNR, no artificial feeding, etc- is no longer a true choice.

Whiff

Just completed the survey. As my husband died in agony from cancer aged 47. If he had wanted to end his life I would have gladly given him an over dose of morphine. It's quality not quantity of life that important. Those who believe at life at any cost haven't had my experience of watching 4 people die. Death is not beautiful it is horrific. No one would let an animal suffer by they let people do.

If it's the person's decision to end their suffering they should be able to and anyone who helps them should not be punished for it.

My brother died 20 years ago at age 49 from bowel cancer and I agree with every word you say Whiff 😢

My dear mum had dementia for 6yrs, awful! It was always her biggest fear as her mum had it too. I know she would have wanted her life ended if she could have had a say in it at the end. She couldn't talk & was double incontinent, couldn't swallow. BUT very happy & sweet natured, as she'd always been. I couldn't have step-in, as much as I loved her.

Oh Whiff you brought a tear to my eye So sorry for the loss of your DH in such a dreadful way.

Watched a really heart moving film last week on this, it was called 'Me before you' A very successful & handsome young man was knocked over by a motor bike leaving him a quadriplegic. When he was allowed home, his mother got him a carer, the last one was a very hip young girl. They fell in love and when she learned he'd been in touch with 'Dignitard' she did everything to change his mind; holidays, trips out etc. but he still went ahead with his plan

I doubt anyone thinks it’s straightforward volver. Quite the opposite.

I hope you read my two last posts GSM.

A good post Shinamae, from ‘the front line’. Precisely what most of us would wish to avoid I’m sure, and it saddens me that volver thinks that planning to avoid it makes anyone ‘smug’. The prospect of having to take such action is pretty horrifying.

BTW a friend of mine has a diagnosis of dementia. They went on a 30 day pacific cruise recently and spend time with their grandchildren, do work for charity and have a full life. They just can't remember what they had for lunch.

I just don't think its as straightforward as some seem to think, as I'm sure you know Shinamae.

Oh Shinamae, that's so sad. I have experience of the kind of situation you describe but I don't want to go into it here.

I firmly believe in assisted dying and think everybody should decide for themselves. I just get a bit exasperated when people say "Oh I'll never let that happen to me, I'll be long gone by then" when they cannot know what lies ahead.

volver

I do too Shinamae. When I saw it the whole cinema was whispering the numbers to her when she couldn't remember them in order.

I'm just a bit fed up of the smug "Oh I'll just have a handful of pills because nobody's wiping my bum" brigade. I don't mean you.

I was one of those willing her to remember,such a powerful but sad film….😢…. I know it is such an emotive subject, but really, I don’t understand why I can’t go to my doctor with my solicitor now, my doctor knows me and knows I would not be coerced into anything. I don’t want to sign out early, but if I get a diagnosis of dementia it’s what I will do. I’ve got it planned out. I’ve tried to tell my children but they really don’t want to know so it’s all written down. I work in a care home with high dementia and I can tell you the majority of people are very,very sad, confused people and their relatives visit and are heartbroken to see the state that their once vibrant parent is now. We had a former midwife a couple of years ago she was constantly distressed, walking around the home, clutching a baby doll and sobbing. Absolutely terrible to see.. we obviously did try to comfort her, but she was inconsolable and her sons used to visit her and said to us we wish she would just go because we can’t bear to see her like this…😓

The ‘handful of drugs brigade’ - not a pleasant way to describe people who don’t want to suffer indignity or be a burden to their families.