Black Dog 17

nadateturbe We once had a fox that came into our kitchen, and we used to hand-feed it with eggs, cheese and cat food. (we had 3 cats then and the fox never bothered with them, though they used to sit hissing at it) It came for months, then didn't come for weeks - and with it returned, had 3 cubs. Never saw it again after that.

Thanks, all. Going to see the new parents and baby tomorrow afternoon - they are home (at DIL's house) now, but naturally tired and need to get to know their baby a bit. Just got in from a lovely day out at a farm park place - stroked rabbits, chickens and guinea pigs. Held a Python, watched owl display, had cottage pie then scone with jam and cream. Got in, to find Son1 there - he'd been sent home fom work with what looks like Impetigo (I'm keeping away from it), so he and DH are fixing something on his car.

SweetpeaSue just read your post of Saturday 19.36. Absolutely shocking what you went through and still are, and no redress. That is very hard to bear. I don’t blame you for talking about it again and again. I hope it helps. Everyone here believes you and is on your side. I just wish someone could do something. Unfortunately our power is sometimes limited. My sister was knocked down by a medical person and he was never prosecuted because of who he was. She still suffers from injuries 50 years later. Perhaps as others suggested therapy would be a good idea. Hope you get your GP appointment soon to discuss pain relief.

Wyllow I really love reading, reading Tidelands, Philippa Gregory atm. and when I can I go to art classes. Jigsaws help me cope for some reason. Unfortunately I rarely know until the morning or even the hour before if I am able to make it. I try to see people socially but it is so difficult. I’m trying to see two aunts tomorrow for coffee and my cousin said could I call in for a chat first, and I had to say no. It’s so frustrating and sad. Like you, I feel I have to adapt to this illness not going away, but to stay hopeful at the same time. Without hope, life I feel would be bleak. And I have so much to be thankful for. Online shopping is good, and saves energy. Even ordering and going to collect it helps. Although I sometimes pop in for a few items just for contact with others. Yoga or aqua aerobics would be lovely, but I can’t build up my stamina enough to do it. I must try harder.
I think it’s a good idea to write to your son and DiL, although you will have to think carefully how to word it. We are very protective of burdening our children, but sometimes we need to open up to them, or how can they know how we feel or why. It’s lovely they are coming to stay close to you for a holiday.
Your picture is so expressive. Thank you for sharing with us about that time. I can’t express how it must have been better than Sweetpeasue.
Scaredycat thanks for your kind words, but I don’t think coping with ME/CFS is anywhere as bad as coping with AF. I have palpitations now and again, for a short time and they really frighten me. I think you cope wonderfully well. (I still don’t understand why they wouldn’t fit a pacemaker.) I’m sure your day out was lovely. Children always make us feel more cheerful.
HVDY SweetpeaSue beat me to it, I was about to say the same about your well fed fox. I do love foxes, I’ve only ever seen one, in a field in France, and strangely during the day. He came out from behind a hedge into a field, stayed a few seconds then disappeared again.
I hope your noisy neighbours don’t make a habit of such early mornings.

Like everyone, I’m glad it’s a bit cooler today. We had a morning walk round the block. There was a cool breeze blowing. I think the heat and humidity is harder with age, maybe to do with circulation.
Hello Doodledog hope cruise is going well.
Hello EllieAnn and Nanna and anyone else reading. Hope you are having some peace and enjoyment today.

HVDY- wonderful news !! So happy for you and all the family. She will be a much loved little girl. Glad DiL had a natural birth too it will be easier for her to recover hopefully.
You must be so relieved - I think we are all happy that all is wellxxx

Great news*HVDY*. So pleased for you all. Congratulations to new parents. 🤗

Huge congratulations HVDY and natural birth, brilliant. So happy for you all.

Back later.

HYDY congratulations nannie. Hope mother and baby are well. Now starts the hard work and a life time of worry. Hopefully you get to hold the baby soon. 🍼👶

Wyllow3 I'm glad you felt looked after in there. I imagine it to be a terrifying experience. MH affects anyone and everyone, doesn't it? No matter a person's background, upbringing, status, etc. Your picture is beautiful.

Just a quick one - Baby arrived at 1.15! DIL went into labour at 10.30 last night, gave birth naturally. 8lb 5oz. Son sent me a photo of the 3 of them, via WhatsApp at 4am.

Hope all BDers manage to have a decent day x

Oh Whiff!

Wave to you Nadateturbe.

Whiff Ooh thats so annoying.I handed my phone to a tech person in mobile phone shop and he knew about this scam. He fixed it for me. So sorry for you, I know how frustrating it is.

Just lost a long post to the Aldi spinning wheel 😡😡😡😡😡

Nadateturbe Nice of you to post. I know you have extreme lack of energy. Hoping you get rest tonight.

Wyllow That must have been a truly defining experience.
I'm so gladyou felt 'looked after' at that most critical time.
'People so ill, cannot be other than themselves. No pretence possible'
I understand that. So incredibly moving. Such vulnerable, fragile people.
Your drawing depicting 'both me' means such a lot because we're always, as a mother, looking after, as should be, our own. It helps to portray that it's ok to feel we need help too at desperate times.
Thankyou.

Good evening, gosh, this humid heat is difficult. I understand your tiredness Scaredycat.
I haven't saved enough energy to post much today. But I had a great time watching Cat Stevens.
Glad your pain eased Sweetpeasue.
Long meeting Wyllow3. You must be shattered.
Thinking of you all also Whiff HVDY (enjoy your"outing)Doodle Allsorts and hope you have a peaceful night.
Talk properly tomorrow.

That would really disturb me, HVDY.
Good for you for resting up.

I did the drawing when I was an inpatient, Sweetpeasue, for a time. I felt looked after. It was 2007, a long time ago, tho there was a lot to be desired in the system, it did exist! there is no "sanctuary" now like that unless you can go private which is as you can imagine £££££

I met people from different cultures, including war refugees who had been traumatised, some most extraordinary people with much wisdom but little formal education.. It was a defining experience in terms of learning about MH. (6 months in) People so ill, cannot be other than themselves. No pretence possible. I got teased about my education but also learnt a very great deal. There was a strong gallows humour, and those who felt ashamed didn't for long.

A most extraordinary trust from a man whose culture was so different..(as regards women, but I "dressed modestly" ....people from the bottom of the pile..its probably why I'm so committed to MH causes and funding and benefits and all care stuff (and feel helplessI cant do more) etc.

the pic here is done from the same time, its about looking after yourself, the words say, "both me".

Whiff Do you know of any others with the same condition? I found 2 Vasculitis support groups on Facebook - and have found out more from them than from the hospital. I had an email from Eon - the DD is going to go down from £217 a month to £135. I think that's too much of a price drop so have set the DD at £180 because I don't want us to get big bills later in the year.

SweetpeaSue Glad you felt able to go out and have coffee and cake. That's always good. Yes, see what your GP can do about pain management. The day trip is tomorrow - hopefully, it will be cooler. DIL having a planned Caesarean tomorrow - some time between 8am and 12.

Wyllow3 A couple of hours of a meeting is a long time to cope with, in this heat, and with little sleep and low mood. I hope tonight will be better for you.

I have done nothing today - too hot, painful legs, and too tired. I was up at 6am! Some clown nearby (I don't know which house) was chatting to friends in his garden at that time, and it woke me up - they were loud, as though they were having a party until 9am. I cooked some chicken thighs for the fox, but he hasn't been at all today (not yet, anyway). I'm going to have a cool shower and go to bed earlier tonight, so hope all BDers have a restful night x

Wyllow 10-30till12-45 is a long time to keep concentration going and remain involved especially after a bad night and with low mental energy. I hope after explaining that it will take some of the strain away from more involvement with business side. Such a shame about you having to miss your Gym.
I looked at the drawing you did of the woman held up in the two hands.
If it had been only one hand I dont think it would have been half as powerful. It is such a loving and gentle image. The 2 hands seem to emphasise the gentleness.
Whiff Thankyou for that lovely little mouse cross stitch picture. It must have taken quite a while to do. I realised later I hadn't commented - sorry - it is lovely.

Mostly I like the heat and sun and just having to wear sleeveless tops - but spend most time in the cool. I think it definitely makes me more tired but nearly everyone seems to feel that (dare I say, "At our ages"). Its this humidity I think takes it our of you. But special sympathies for BD's whose medical conditions are triggered especially by heat xx.

But you did so well to turn out yesterday Scaredeycat because the rewards of seeing DGC. I SO agree about seeing them enjoying old fashioned things away from devices and direct people contact stuff.

I'm glad you have had a better day Sweetpeasue but understand the underlying stuff. Yes definitely address the pain with the GP as it makes a lot of difference.

HVDY I'm picturing fox heaven with your delights on offer and that pals might come along. am watching out with others for new baby news and hope its good.

Doodle, how has MrD fared? Hoping you ar able to get something out of the break-away.

Today was difficult as we had a Quaker business meeting after the ordinary meeting. I felt bad not being able to offer more in terms of involvement and had to say why really, as I "appear" as well enough and my difficulties invisible. So missed my popping into gym.

We did resolve difficulties adequately (oh why did I say this or that after) but the MfW then the business meeting took from 10.30 to 12.45 and completely did me in, my staying power so short. Plus troubled night and black dog on waking as per have that weariness about future stretching ahead like this. But a lot of us feel that xx

Very best wishes to others not posted today. Holding you in the light, and others on gransnet who dont post here but struggle.

Scaredycat Dear Scaredycat been wondering if you were ok. I think many of us understand that returning disappointed feeling that we can't do what we once could for our many different reasons. You must have enjoyed the village fete amd it's nice to be with family though I do kwym about the heat and crowds. Good to be able to sit aside and take in the scene without being inside it. Hope today has been ok for you. Thankyou for your hug. I think there is an element of PTSD but it's been a continuation of next Gyn consultant's involvement too and the coldness and dishonesty about the Adenomyosis. Its been so hot today I hope your AF hasn't been too bad.
Whiff The heat can be unbearable can't it? I'm sorry it's affected your joints and limb pain. It's a good thing you can check with others who have HPX, now you have the support group, especially as the illness is so rare. We did get a letter about reduced energy bill - - only fractional but' thankful for small mercies'.
HVDY Hope you've had a good day trip today and been in reception areas for messages from son about babyfront. You must have the best fed fox in the area. He/she will be bringing pals ☺️.

Much better night and bladder pain much lighter a and briefer. What the nauseating deep ache that feels like coming from uterus and down legs is Ive no idea. Fluctuating throught the day. We had coffee and cake in nearby village cafe this morning. So good to get out and feel a liitle brighter. Did some washing, read in garden then deep ache came back, into back and running down legs. Took oramorph, pain easing but mentally feeling a bit low again as if much could be nerve related and will never be found out. Keeping feet on ground though - trying not to overthink it all right now. Need a GP appt this week to catch up about pain and HRT as might be folly to start low dose.
Hope all have had a decent day. Hope you're ok EllieAnne Not heard from you lately. Doodle Hope DH is ok today.

ScaredyCat I think this weather is making a lot of people feel drained and worn-out. Yes, I try to keep my legs up when possible. Not sure what time baby will arrive tomorrow - I'll be out on a day trip, so will be watching my mobile all day, waiting for the call from Son2. You had a lovely day yesterday, then. Even better that your husband cooked.

EllieAnne, Allsorts, not heard from you recently, so hope you're ok.

The fox came back at 11.30 last night, so he had the 3 chicken breasts I'd cooked . If/when he comes today, I've got 6 cooked chicken thighs and a tin of dog food ready .

Hope ALL DBers manage to have a decent day and keep cook x

Hi all.
Sorry I,ve been absent the last couple of days . I,ve read all your posts but I,ve been so tired in this heat just felt a bit overwhelmed . Oh that sounds like an excuse but really have been exhausted.
SweetPeaSue- Oh you have had such a hard time these last few days my heart goes out to you. The Op has really triggered so much for you and I think HVDY could be correct with her thoughts on PTSD. I do know that people who have been in ITU are often affected by this afterwards so it makes sense that all you have been through could have affected you in this way. If only your pain could be dealt with compassionately and effectively. Sending a hug.
Wyllow- so pleased that your family will be coming to stay near you in August. Also,that you have had pleasant contact with DiL. Yes don’t rush into writing but it might help them and you to understand the situation better. I am sure they always want what’s best for you.
As for the moving- you enjoy your Gym and Quakers and they are obviously a big part of your life also your feelings about your house sound more positive. You have a choice but not one you have to make immediately.
Hope today is a good one.
Whiff- your posts are so full of positivity and caring. It’s wonderful that your move has brought such benefit to your life and you deserve it so much.
Nadaturbe- you deal with the difficulties of your condition in such a brave way. I,m glad you have good memories of your past achievements but of course this is also a sadness too.
You must have good concentration and patience to do jigsaws- I had one made for my daughter of a photo I,d taken on a bridge in Venice. Do you like reading or watching films?
Doodle- so sorry to hear DH hasn’t been so good and hope he’s feeling better now. Hope you have some good days before you head for home and that you feel some benefits from the break.
HVDY- what a fun afternoon with the girls and Son1. Love the burger eating fox - they are beautiful but sometimes push their luck don’t they. Chicken - you are spoiling him😀
No sign of baby yet - you must all be so excited. Hope everything goes well for DiL tomorrow if nothing happens today.
So sorry your legs are so painful - do you have to keep them elevated a lot?

Yesterday was our village fete so met up with family and spent a couple of hours there. It was so hot and the world turned up!! I felt so wobbly and tired but just wanted to be with my family so drank water and sat down when I could .So good to see 2 of theGGC enjoying an old fashioned afternoon - no technology involved!! DH cooked dinner so I could rest.
Yes must think of the good things and not dwell on this new way of life.
EllieAnne,Candy, Allsorts, and all those who post or just read hope this Sunday is as good as possible.

Doodle hope your husband is feeling better. I don't think this very hot weather is helping anyone as it seems to make any symptoms worse. I know my husband pre cancer days used to get upset tummy if it was very hot no idea why it just happened. I know the heat has made my balance worse and making me breathless . But checked with others with HPX and it's the same for them. Also my joints hurt worse . You would think the heat would do them good but it just makes me more achy and my ankles swell. The only saving grace is we don't need heating on. Have others had email from their energy company? Eon sent me one from 1st July energy prices are coming down.

Hope everyone has the best day they can.

Doodle Sorry, missed the part about your husband not being well. Hope he feels better today and that the weather isn't affecting him.

Thanks Wyllow. I've not a clue about all this stuff. DH worked at Tesco for a couple of yrs on checkout when he took voluntary redundancy about 8yrs ago so knew this tech lad. He seemed to know of this Aldi wheel scam. Said it was mainly on Chrome searching engine. Looks like its still on my phone though not all the time as it was.

Missed your post Doodle. Sorry your husband has been unwell. I hope it passes quickly. x