Picking mum up

You can get an inflatable cushion which you roll a person on and that helps get them up. Paramedics used to use these when we called for a fallen resident.

Phone 111 and ask for paramedics to attend. It is not safe to try and lift her yourself. When my OH falls I put a solid dining chair in front of him. When he has recovered his equilibrium he reaches up and gradually pulls himself up. Then I help him to sit. If he can’t do it I call the paramedics. They bring an inflating cushion and raise him after checking that he is not injured.

You don’t say how your mother fell, but if it’s out of bed what about a bed guardwhich will prevent mum from rolling out

www.therange.co.uk/health-and-beauty/mobility-aids-and-independent-living/homcom-safety-bed-rail-for-elderly-folding-bed-assist-rail-with-storage-pocket?gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAADFuktyY3_kssSNWYnXvriVbo-YLK&gclid=EAIaIQobChMInMOAkczOhwMVuJRQBh3IaBMZEAQYASABEgL8BfD_BwE#2729075

It sounds like you have tried (and failed) to help your mum, but due to her stubbornness you're getting nowhere.
Her stubbornness sounds like embarrassment to me. She'd rather berate you than let anyone else see her struggle.
I'd do as others have suggested.
Leave her there, pillow and duvet and ring 999. Let her wait for help, let her wet & soil herself while she waits.
A few times of doing that, she'll realise that family help is no longer possible and could mean her moving to a care home.

Maybe being the talk of the town (re fire brigade) will make your mum cooperate and follow the advice to help herself

We had the same for 9 years, I wouldn't put my children through what we had to put up with

My father had dementia and a live in carer plus us visiting two days a week. He would slide off the chair and bed and only my husband was strong enough to get him back up.
One day when we were unavailable due to our own hospital appointments (both having had cancer), he slipped again. The excellent carer called the ambulance but he waited for several hours. He got very frustrated and scraped his feet on the carpet trying to get up. This sadly eventually led to gangrene and his death in hospital,,,,,

Please don't carry on lifting her yourself. A friend helped to care for a very selfish elderly male relative. He had plenty of money but refused to pay for professional care, giving said friend the occasional £20 now and again. Anyway to cut a long story short she injured her back lifting him and had to have an operation and months of physio to recover. The other relatives then refused to carry on helping elderly gent and he ended up in an astronomically expensive care home. Never apologised to my friend either!

My late father and late husband both had to be picked up off the floor by the ambulance service. So I go to the gym, and push and pull weights, in order to do as much as I can to make sure that I don't wind up in the same state.

Ask her Dr for a referral to the "Falls" Service. They will come out to assess her and if there is any equipment they can provide you with to help, they will.

I am 80, so probably close to the age of SheepIzzy's mother and I have no time for people of my generation or older who determinedly stick to their home and possessions when they can no longer cope and just presume that their children will deal with their problem.

Hallelujah! The voice of common sense M0nica.
I would just add that SheepyIzzy should tell her mother your advice before she has her next fall, which she no doubt will as it seems she's doing nothing to avoid it.

annsixty we have two of those inflatable mattresses, what a very clever idea. I'm going to take one over to Dad's flat and keep it there.
I think ours came from Argos.

Aveline

Please don't try and lift her yourself. Make her as comfortable as possible on the floor and call an ambulance. They may divert the call to the falls service which has all the equipment needed to get a person safely off the floor. You might have a wait but better that than damaging your own back. You'd be no use to her then! Good luck.

You're right Aveline.
My brother younger 70's and elder brother late 70's (lived together).
Younger brother was carer for the eldest who was in very poor health and little mobility.
He kept falling down and if it was later on at night my son used to go down to their house and between them they got him back up again.
One night he rolled out of bed onto the floor and carer brother rang for an ambulance. He was told to put a pillow under his head and make him comfortable. This was about 2am and an ambulance arrived at 7am.
They told him he should never try to get him up on his own. Even to move someone you must never pull on their arms. Always underneath the arms.
Long story short. He had his bed downstairs and had 2 carers in 4 times a day to get him out of bed on a " Return" which looks like a sack barrow. The person stands on it and the carers wheel it to the chair.
He had other needs apart from this.
Prior to all of this, when both brothers were well they were carers for my elderly mum, she had her bed downstairs.
they both ended up with sciatica and were in lots of pain just lifting her into a light wheelchair from the sofa to her bed.
I know it will be a long wait for an ambulance to arrive but better that than harming you or your mum. Please don't pull on her arms you could pull them out the socket.
Your mum needs professional help.

A single one which mine is is as cheap as £50 from Amazon.

My H fell several times and we would wait hours for help.
One day someone told me how the carecall system used an inflatable chair so my brain ticked into gear.
We had a single inflatable mattress for visitors so I brought it downstairs into my H’s room.
The next time he fell I dragged it next to him and rolled him on to it.
This was easier than it sounds.
I then told him to fold his arms and lie very flat and still.
I then plugged it in to a socket and it slowly inflated , he seemed very safe.
When it was fully inflated I was able to sit him up and we pulled his legs over the side and he was able to stand up.
I used it many times, it was very successful.
When I-once told the ambulance service they were very impressed. These beds are available on Amazon and not expensive.
I think it might be called Bestway.
I can’t check as it in the loft now,

Next time Mum ends up on the floor simply leave her there, put a cushion or pillow under her head, a blanket over her and just wait until you can get help - do not attempt to lift her yourself because you could both get hurt and then you would be no help to her whatsoever. Calling 111 or 999 will ultimately result in a lengthy wait but at least Mum will be safe, comfortable and warm.

Nearby furniture can be used as an aid to get up from the floor - encourage Mum to shift her position to get to her knees if possible and then ease herself onto an armchair or settee - I used this method with both my parents and also patients who had called an ambulance thinking we could levitate people.

The safest way, without calling on emergency services would be to use a hoist.

They are big and cumbersome, though, and I suspect your mum would hate it.

Is she able to move at all once she has fallen?

She has a fall alarm, it's a pebble, it comes to my phone, when she wears it "can't be bothered,.too heavy.....I forgot...". We've heard all the excuses.

Normally she has enough umph in her legs to push as I pull, that evening with having one of her gaga moments, she wore herself out (I like to think!)

Ambulance calls around here, you will be waiting for a couple of hours at least!

Fire brigade? She wouldn't like that, talk of the town she says!

She has been assessed! She sits there and smiles! we were at falls therapy Friday morning, mum tells lady her version of truth, I tell her the proper truth! Lady said she's heard it many times this week, "mum won't listen!" She has gone a lot weaker since last year, her hands have gone numb ( GP seen, blood test done.........) She's had the nerve jab in her hip (waste of time) she says, NO ONE can get through to her!

We've had therapists out to see how she walks, they've ALL told her to pull up, walk straight! Her? Frame in front, her bent over. Won't listen. Lady on Friday said (sorry, can't think of word) something slump, to Do with lack of strength in middle. She said they can help, build up strength, given her exercises to do EVERY day until the classes start. So far she hasn't done them and shows no interest in doing them.

Stop nagging me, is what I get off her quite regularly!

Gotta give her 10 out of 10 for bloodymindedness and stubbornness!

There are companies out there who will respond to a falls alarm. You pay a monthly fee and they give you a pendant or wrist alarm to press if you fall.

aggie

Please don’t try to lift someone who has fallen , ring the fire brigade
You could injure the person and yourself
Best thing is ring the GP and tell them what has been happening and get a physio and OT referal

I agree! They’re used to lifting people and will probably arrive on the scene more quickly than an ambulance. This happened with my MIL. She’d fallen in an upstairs bedroom and the fireman just scaled his ladder and went in through the window!

There are ways to enable people to help themselves depending on the circumstances.
You need an assessment of your circumstances before you are injured and unable to help your mother at all.

Please don't try and lift her yourself. Make her as comfortable as possible on the floor and call an ambulance. They may divert the call to the falls service which has all the equipment needed to get a person safely off the floor. You might have a wait but better that than damaging your own back. You'd be no use to her then! Good luck.

I am 80, so probably close to the age of SheepIzzy's mother and I have no time for people of my generation or older who determinedly stick to their home and possessions when they can no longer cope and just presume that their children will deal with their problem.

Next time this lady falls I suggest SheepIzzy just tells her, kindly, that it is not safe for her to help her mother get up and she is too heavy for her to lift, in fact could do herself an injury were she to attempt to lift her - and dials 111 or 999.

Once she has done this 2 or 3 times, Social Services will be called in and her mother's needs will be assessed and the help she needs listed.

Contact your GP, she needs an occupational therapy assessment. They may also recommend other adaptations. I have an inflatable lifting aid for my DH. It works very well. You definitely shouldn't be lifting her.

Maybe you need a care needs assessment.
You could speak to her GP about a referral to OTs who could show you how to safely move your Mum. That wouldn’t include getting her off the floor.
They might suggest a walking frame, rails etc. Are you meaning the house is cluttered and hard to navigate for her?

Please don’t try to lift someone who has fallen , ring the fire brigade
You could injure the person and yourself
Best thing is ring the GP and tell them what has been happening and get a physio and OT referal