Cancer - are you going through it too?

To be honest I found the website for the type of cancer I was being treated for was the best. It was constantly monitored by moderators who had a lot of experience and advice. I would think there are helplines and sites for most cancers. Pick UK ones. And try not to google. A lot of information on google is random and often incorrect and out of date or not applicable to the UK...if that is where you live.
Good luck. It is a horrible time and you need good correct advice. I got some terrible advice which could have been damaging from "friends". And also some pretty patronising stuff which doesnt help.

Our cancer team advised not to use Doctor Google and that is what we are doing. My DS has brain cancer. No cure.

Hugs to you HelterSkelter1

Friends always say that if you eat this mushroom or if you avoid this fruit, all of your cancer cells will disappear. Yah. Not. It is so hard to politely disregard their well-meaning advice.

I used Macmillon s website and for the particular cancer
there was a chat section to read others experiences and advice of the particular cancer you were interested in You could speak privately to another member if you wanted but there were people with professional advice to help if needed

I am so sorry Macadia, my dd was diagnosed with aggressive cancer some years ago ( she is ok at present) but at the time it was heartbreaking. Still is, its always a worry.
I hope you and your son get support from the cancer charities and if you want to post here there are a number of us who understand. .
As for Dr Google who often give worst case advice, best to avoid if you can.

Thank you Macadia. I am in remission but also have a non curable, but treatable cancer.
It is a horrible time for you both. When you feel the rug has been pulled from under your feet. The best advice I had was to take each day at a time. Try not to think or worry about the future. I was told by my lovely niece, who sadly is about to have another round of chemo after 3 years remission, to always have plenty of microwave ready meals in the freezer for the days you haven't got the energy.
I set up a whatsapp type of site to let my 2 daughters know exactly what was happening to me and all my tests and results so they had the same info at the same time and had time to read and re read. As some days you just don't feel up to phone calls and questions and repeating yourself. The same with friends and relations.
We often use cabs for hospital trips...for both of us... which just makes life easier.
And look after yourself. Make life as easy as possible. Accept any help, if it helps you. I had my treatment during lockdown and discovered on line shopping. Food delivery from Waitrose was a lifesaver. And now the ease of buying anything on Amazon (I know I know not the most ethical!) makes shopping almost a pleasure.
And finally I wrote a lot of what I was feeling down at the end of each day which did help to empty my mind. I expect you and your husband are doing a lot of talking. And that's good. Don't bottle stuff up. I hope he is able to talk about his feelings and fears as well.
Be in the moment is a phrase I used to hate..but not anymore.

I was about to post, but HelterSkelter ‘s post at 8.16 covered much of what I was going to say. Make the most of every day. Listen to the experts. Accept help if you need it. Good luck.

I will do everything I can which is not a whole lot I think but today, I had some energy and found our personal nutritionist/dieticians recommendations and purchased every single thing for a ton of recipes to make for my DS. It's funny how one will try every single thing as if a miracle could happen but actually there is no miracle about to happen but we just try things over and over to stop from just plain crying our eyes out.

Thank you HelterSkelter1 . I am working on the meals ready thing.

There are plenty of forums on line ,I used cancer care mostly they had different forums depending what cancer you had ,Macmillan also have a similar thing , it's a journey none of us want but take one day at a time.

I have a couple of serious ongoing health conditions (not cancer related) and have found some sensible face book groups where I can ask questions and also offer my experiences to others. Medical questions are discouraged but there are lots of things that can be asked. (I'm on high dose long term steroids and one of my queries was would that have ant affect on dyeing my hair - others experience was positive)
Most groups have a uk version and a universal one (largely American) and it's interesting to see the differences/similarities in treatment (and makes you appreciate the NHS)

One more thing. Having cancer can drain your body of energy so don't hold back on carbohydrates and high calorie foods and all the things you and he perhaps wouldn't normally eat. Whatever you both fancy is what you should aim for. Weight loss is to be avoided as much as possible.

Macadia get in touch with Cancer UK and there may be a support group near you either in person or online . Only someone with the same cancer can truly understand how you feel and how it's effecting you physical and mental health.

Sometimes it's good to speak to people you vaguely know online, I think.

My girl didn't appreciate hearing how older ladies laughed, when their falsies came out and floated off down a river.

Macadia

Our cancer team advised not to use Doctor Google and that is what we are doing. My DS has brain cancer. No cure.

Do you have a Maggies centre at your hospital. They are great for help and information, or even just having a cuppa and a chat about nothing.
Look them up at maggies.org