aggie
I’m 88, I live next door to my eldest daughter, I can load the washer and hang out the washing , I have a cleaning lady one session a week , I prepare my own meals , I’ve no intention of moving to a care home
But !! If I did have to be incarcerated , why on earth would I go out of my way to be curmudgeonly ! ,
I’m no one’s mat but I do think being pleasant helps oil the wheels
Unfortunately Aggie it's often the case that "being pleasant" gets translated into "getting walked over/being a doormat/being made to fit into someone else's ideas regardless".
It's easy to see that, for instance, questioning one's breakfast that was given would probably result in a "Duh!" look on someone's face - as they didn't know/didn't care exactly what went into it. Or they were more intelligent than that - but ground down by the boss into "We do things THIS way - blow what the customer wants". One comes across so much of it and I reckon many carehomes would act the same. It would be "Yes I know you might be used to having a healthy breakfast of your choice - but what WE do is x. Tough". Followed by me saying "You are paid x hundred £s per week for each of us. So yes - I have noticed the porridge is sludge from a packet, it's bread spread instead of butter, instant coffee instead of real coffee. Can you please provide me with x/y/z that I myself have?" and I could see the day going downhill from there. I'm someone that would make a careful diary of events/find out who to complain to/etc.
Being pleasant if one can be is obviously the way to go - but for those of us who aren't getting what we're paying for and are questioners.....sometimes we do have to question/question again and ultimately say "I'm not putting up with this - I'm paying for better than this".