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Urge incontinence

(62 Posts)
MrsHappy Sun 23-Nov-25 15:01:44

I am suffering very badly with urge incontinence. I am at the point I can rarely get to the toilet without not just leaking, but letting go. It's costing me a fortune in pads!!
Does anyone have experience of this and is there a cure?

skate Mon 24-Nov-25 17:14:54

I endorse the mind over matter approach, it does help. I live in a block of flats and as I approach the entrance I can suddenly feel the urge to wee. So when I get in the lift I imagine that when I get to my floor and the doors open, there will be Queen Elizabeth II waiting to greet me and asking if I have come far. Sounds mad but it does work. Sometimes it's King Charles but I find the Queen is more effective!

4allweknow Mon 24-Nov-25 16:49:31

I read that along with pelvic exercises when you are trying to hold on getting to the toilet just telling yourself over and over you do not need to wee in a relaxing manner usually convinces you to hold on. It was an incontinence nurse who had written the item. I don't suffer incontinence but when desperate I do use the technique and find it works. Something to do with distraction thinking.

Oreo Mon 24-Nov-25 16:35:26

It sounds truly horrible…do hope you all manage to get some help from your GP.A lot of people suffer in silence if they feel embarrassed but if you don’t ask you don’t get.

NotSpaghetti Mon 24-Nov-25 16:28:44

True, jools
Some people might like to know the difference:

my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/22161-urge-incontinence

gillyknits Mon 24-Nov-25 16:26:32

I went to my doctor who diagnosed a rectal prolapse and sent me to a pelvic physiotherist who showed me how to improve my pelvic floor and also got my doctor to prescribe oestrogen pessaries. What a difference they made. The physio described them as a vaginal face lift.
I have to keep up the pelvic floor exercises but it’s made an amazing improvement!

jools1 Mon 24-Nov-25 16:21:10

Some of these replies seem more about dealing stress incontinence rather than urge incontinence - a very different thing! MrsHappy - I suffer too from urge incontinence and it is a nightmare and can really affect going on day trips and holidays. I've been told it is more about the brain giving the wrong message and somehow you have to switch off that part of the brain by thinking of something else! I don't really understand this but, like you, would welcome any practical advice

MayBee70 Mon 24-Nov-25 15:37:00

yogitree

CariadAgain

There is an acupressure point - so I gather - just underneath the nose. It's in between the bottom of the nostrils and the top of the upper lip. In that groove beneath the nostrils. I gather one presses firmly on it to give the message to your body of "You can stop that right now - and wait until I am ready".

HTH.

Ooo! You give me hope, I will try this!

Would that stop me having to get up several times in the night? ( she says hopefully…)

GANNET Mon 24-Nov-25 15:35:56

Go and see a Pelvic Health specialist physio they are really good.

yogitree Mon 24-Nov-25 15:25:16

CariadAgain

There is an acupressure point - so I gather - just underneath the nose. It's in between the bottom of the nostrils and the top of the upper lip. In that groove beneath the nostrils. I gather one presses firmly on it to give the message to your body of "You can stop that right now - and wait until I am ready".

HTH.

Ooo! You give me hope, I will try this!

LOUISA1523 Mon 24-Nov-25 15:14:20

Jojo1950

Can you use vaginal oestrogen if had stage 1 breast cancer.? TIA .

I've had stage 1 breast camcer twice and stage 2 roast camcer once....I use vaginal estrogen....a years worth is the equivalent of one dose of HRT ( or something like that) ....lots of research out there...have a read up

saltnshake Mon 24-Nov-25 14:37:27

Jojo1950 I have had stage 2 breast cancer , DCIS, I use the vaginal oestrogen. My GP first checked with Consultant Oncologist that it would be ok. There are many types of breast cancer so it is safest to check.

KGee Mon 24-Nov-25 14:24:38

Jojo1950 vaginal oestrogen can be used by women who have had breast cancer as the dose is so tiny but you must ask your doctor to make sure it’s ok in your case. Hope it helps

Jojo1950 Mon 24-Nov-25 14:16:05

Can you use vaginal oestrogen if had stage 1 breast cancer.? TIA .

meadowgran Mon 24-Nov-25 14:16:00

Has anybody tried Jude supplements for this? I understand from thé adverts that they can really help but haven’t tried them yet. They are available in Boots and Holland and Barrett as well as online and based on pumpkin seed and soy extracts. I actually tried 15 grams of actual pumpkin seeds a day which definitely helped but you have to keep taking them. When I stopped the urge incontinence came back. Also with this condition and in my seventies, my bladder is ultra sensitive to caffeine these days so I’ve really had to cut back on tea and coffee which also helps,

Toddleo Mon 24-Nov-25 14:12:36

I have suffered really badly with this for many years. I have had a course of physiotherapy from a bladder physio following a referral from my doctor which was very helpful, it checked that I was exercising my pelvic floor muscles correctly. I also started a dose of Jude bladder supplements (look them up) I take two every day and have some done so for about a year .I have also lost three and a half stone . I do pelvic floor exercises very regularly .I would say that I am 80% better than I was at my worst . I hope this information is helpful. I am in my early 60s

KGee Mon 24-Nov-25 14:11:21

You need to ask your doctor for vaginal oestrogen either pessary or cream this will improve not only the vagina but also the urethra and greatly improve your symptoms. All women can use it whether or not you’ve been on HRT. Pelvic floor exercises will also help and request a referral to physio if needed. You will see an improvement within 2-3 weeks of using the vaginal oestrogen cream. No need to suffer in silence like most women do! Good Luck!

SuzyQqq Mon 24-Nov-25 13:51:31

It’s worth seeing your GP to see if vaginal HRT pessaries may help, as they target this problem among others and are not like taking other forms of HRT - much milder . Also recommend the Peri Fit exerciser which works the pelvic floor and strengthens muscles.

NotSpaghetti Mon 24-Nov-25 01:07:17

Can you refer yourself to the pelvic health clinic in your area?

This (see link) is the NICE info.
I haven't looked at it properly but it has resources listed.

In my area we have a Specialist Pelvic Health Team - they have incontinence nurses etc and can provide free pads if necessary

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng210/chapter/recommendations

Wyllow3 Sun 23-Nov-25 23:06:05

It's worth it, isnt it, mokryna There is a lady at the gym still doing Pilates class who is 84 but has been doing it for a long time.

btw, if GN's cant get up and down from the floor a firm bed is better than not having a go, and once you learn how to pull in your pelvic floor, the breathing and the tum in, you can do it sitting on a chair.

mokryna Sun 23-Nov-25 21:31:54

Wyllow3 ps Although I am not a yoga teacher I am nearly 76.

Wyllow3 Sun 23-Nov-25 21:15:31

whoops here we go

www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_PM-wN116Q

adapt anything sitting by using a big cushion to sit on.

Wyllow3 Sun 23-Nov-25 21:13:59

mokryna

I used to leak a little but after going to a beginner’s Pilates class for two years the problem has gone. I am really pleased so maybe a thing to try.

Going to a class will help: I take meds where if I didnt do pilates/yoga I would have it bad (get it now and then, carry spare undies), its a matter of control over the whole of the pelvic floor.

Its not a cure all, its an "every little helps", depending on the cause and level of your condition. (I'm 74, a qualified yoga teacher and incorporate bits of relevant Pilates in)

meanwhile: try here, its from a specialist on stress incontinence

xx all we can do it

In

Iam64 Sun 23-Nov-25 21:00:14

I’m prescription bed vaginal extrogen.
Thanks dontcallmelove. Ill

LOUISA1523 Sun 23-Nov-25 20:43:07

Vaginal estrogen

Dontcallmelove Sun 23-Nov-25 17:57:07

I have a double prolapse and an overactive bladder with frequency and urge issues. I use vaginal oestrogen which helps a little but the biggest help is pelvic floor exercises. I saw a NHS gynae physio who was useless, this is a common complaint among women with bladder issues, unfortunately. I then paid to see a physio privately and the difference was incredible. I came out of her office feeling so much more positive and confident that my issues could be improved.
I would recommend to anyone, if you can afford it, see a private gynae physio, it may save you money as you’ll end up spending less on pads!