How does it feel to be so desperate about your constant battle with food and your sense of being out of control around food that you would resort to having a gastric band fitted? Share your thoughts on here, we would love to hear from you.
I am not sure how to put this, but, who in their right mind would ask to have their body operated on (with all the associated risks) and one that they could ill afford. Desperation and a feeling of failure to control your health , a constant battle going on in your head every day regarding food and your weight.
Last Saturday I went to an approved private hospital (not the cheapest but one that has a good reputation and proved success figures) and after a 2 hour chat booked a gastric band operation for a few weeks time. The price of it could have got me a new car, new windows or new kitchen, things that I really need, but would not have considered spending on because I could not afford such, but I am willing to go into debt for a chance to lose weight.
I have been fat for roughly 5 years, I have never got used to it or felt comfortable being such a size. For the past 2-3 years I have been 16st, losing weight to 15.7 or going up again to 16.7. This see-saw has been constant as every day I start a diet or healthy eating, obviously most days I fail. I have speights of positive thinking and carry on for a few weeks but cannot seem to get below 15.7, so there I plateau and then lose the will to live once again. I have tried every diet going, I have a library of books and perhaps enough knowledge now to be a dietician and tell other people how to lose weight. I have seen two dieticians myself who cannot help me, that is because I feel like I cannot help myself. Gastric banding is not the answer (you can cheat it, I believe Vanessa Feltz did just that, but she must have more money than sense and not felt desperate or frightened enough) you have to work with the band and you can cause complications if you do not follow the rules. I am excited about the band but also terrified of what I am doing, but I feel there is nothing left to try now, this is what I have to do to improve my health and improve my opinion of myself.
Dear "sumo" thank you for such a wonderful and moving letter about you decision to have a gastric band fitted. I hope that I and others can be here to see you through the next few weeks. You have expressed beautifully what it feels like to be in the yo yo battle with dieting. Maybe sometimes we may not be able to find a cure to the psychological and emotional reasons for the weight gain.
Still I am fighting every day to try and control the food I am consuming. Before gastric banding a diet has to be followed to allow your liver to shrink a little so that the surgeon can easily move it to one side whilst he puts the band round your stomach. You have to drastically reduce your calorie intake, 800 to 1,000 to be precise. This has to be for 5-7 days pre op. So yes, that horrible word diet rears its ugly head again and as of up to now I have not conquered this quota! Tonight I have made up the shakes for starting the diet tomorrow but I have been doing that for the past four days and failing to go without solid food, but of course the band is not yet in place so the hunger pangs are rife. It is also supposed to put your mindset into just drinking for two weeks, not eating. Hey Ho, I have another two weeks to go before I have to seriously follow this shakes diet, maybe it is because I know this I cannot fully accept the denial of food, there is a small corner of my mind (I am being perfectly honest) that thinks, I am not going to be able to have those lovely treats and tastes every again, so I will just try for the last time! This is what I mean about the constant battles I have in my mind, they never stop. Anyway if anyone is interested I will keep you posted of progress (or not). x
Hello sumo Your struggle sounds agonising and in some ways perhaps you thought the gastric band would solve all of this struggle you have on a daily basis. What benefits will you gain from the GB will it take away those hunger pains and the cravings? You have done 1000 calorie diets before I am sure and maybe what you need to help you through is more than food. Will keeping diary on here help? Would talking help you through. So often these cravings are not about food but about what food represents for you. Love, companionship, or maybe food helps you supress emotions of despair, loneliness and so on, what does food and overeating do you for you? I understand the way you describe the fear of letting go of nice food stuffs, but maybe you could replace that with something else, sometimes just talking helps, fills that empty space that perhaps food fills. You need to find something to do when you feel the cravings. Maybe you have spent so much of your life taking care of others you now have to care more for yourself and you sound as if you don't know where to start. How can I help? xx