Jimmy Savile

At college, in the sixties, a friend and I unwisely accepted a lift into the town centre.
The male driver was driving erratically, one handed. It took me a while to realise what was going on. I was in the front passenger seat, my friend in the back.I asked him to stop the car which he did and I flew out. My friend was banging on the window, I had to open the door to let her out. He had removed the handles on the inside.
We went, immediately, to the Police station. Described the man,the car and gave some details of the number.
We were treated as young fantasists! We heard no more!
They say sex offenders' crimes get worse, I can only imagine with horror what might have then happened to the next passenger unable to escape!
At least the Savile case is being taken seriously, thank goodness!

absent no surprise there is there ? he was mentioned a week or so ago,I wonder how many other "2nd rate famous" names we will hear of over the next few days I bet a few people are twitching in their boots.

I remember an occasion when I was in the sixth form, someone reported to the head that there was a man wearing nothing but a yellow cardigan standing at his front gate along one of the main routes to school. I think the entire Middle School made a point of walking home along that particular road, pointing and giggling. I should think that dealt with the problem. Certainly we saw neither him nor his yellow cardigan again.

Apparently Gary Glitter has been arrested this morning as part of Operation Yew Tree. No surprise there.

Night all!

No! Most women seemed to think that sex was not nice and suffered from vaginissmuss!

Well perhaps, but most working class homes were very overcrowded. Amd although families of 12 were rare, for to six children were common. Certainly in the northern town where I grew up. It really was important to maintain boundaries. I agree that incest / 'child abuse' was not unknown, as it isn't today, but considerate husbands and wise men made sure that strict standards of behaviour were maintained. But they didn't 'bother' their wives as a method of limiting families and giving very overworked and weary women a bit of peace.

No! Not in my home town. The council houses were large and I can only think of two families with 12+ children. Incest was well known.
The men never saw their wives unclothed either. A considerate husband was one who ' very rarely bothered them!'

Jeni, that may be funny, and I suppose it is. But that degree of 'prudery' was a defence in working class overcrowded homes of inappropriate display and a protection of the young.

No! Apparently even their wives never saw them unclothed!

Although that could be interpreted as a sexist and inappropriate remark on my part....

Perhaps they were waiting for you to help them, jeni?

Mind you in wednesbury the men were VERY reluctant to part with their clothes!

Interesting thought Jeni - I have sometimes wondered this.

I now wonder if I should have been chaperoned when examining men?

Yes greatnan - as a wife of a doctor I know about women fantasizing about doctors - I always used to say it was the "licence to grope" that turned them on. My OH would never have examined a woman without a chaperone if remooval of clothes was required. Too much to lose.

I had an incident as a student when someone exposed themselves to me - the frightening thing was that it was at night on a quiet lane and I had no way of knowing what else might be about to happen. The police were hopeless and wanted me to walk back down the same lane to file a report! - and one of their sergeants pestered me for ages afterwards with bunches of flowers.

A friend of mine was in a situation where the police comandeered her flat for a surveillance operation on another flat - she had the devil's own job to keep the PC off her. Did she report him? - I doubt it. So much goes unreported as all these posts show.

Gagagran it was indecent exposure and it certainly had an unpleasant impact on you. I was frightened by a man exposing himself on a bus, but didn't feel abused - I was angry once I'd got myself well away from him and went home to complain to my parents. However, when the whole hockey team spotted a youth exposing himself outside the school playing field, we laughed ourselves silly, but we were safe and our games teachers shooed us all inside whilst they phoned the police, who made us laugh even more when they asked for a description. I now know that indecent exposers aren't harmless, sad men - they put as much planning and deviant thinking into their offences as hands-on abusers do.

I was amazed at how little supervision seems to have been around. One of my DDs took part in a film on STV, in the late 70s, when she was 15. She was chaperoned at all times by a female programme assistant. The film was stunning, and she was cared for every minute. Part of the filming was on location and they stayed in a hotel. The assistant slept in the same room, and I think it was locked, can't remember, but she had a wonderfully happy experience. The star of the series was a well-known Scottish TV presenter, and highly respected. Why were these girls not supervised or suspicions reported instantly. It is totally horrific.

Fortunately, a lot of women are not putting up with it from doctors any more. The GMC Fitness to Practise calendar details many incidents of complaints. A doctor who examines a woman intimately without a chaperon is an idiot. There are women who fantasise about doctors, or bring charges if they are rejected.

When I was about 12, one sunny afternoon in the holidays, I went to a public park with my best friend and her Dad. I was quite a sporty girl, unlike my friend, and her Dad liked to take us to throw a tennis ball around, giving me especially some very high and hard throws to catch. I saw a man sitting on a seat watching us and eventually I missed one of the throws meant for me and the ball ended up at his feet.

He picked it up and beckoned me over to him and as I got near I saw to my horror that what I had thought to be a package on his knee was actually his penis and he was fondling it as he beckoned me towards him. I can still see his face and would recognise him even now over 50 years later. I was frozen with shock and horror and just stood there until he stood up, threw the ball at me, with a horrible grin on his face and walked off.

I should have told my friend's Dad but I just didn't have the words and so I said nothing, not even to my friend. This has remained such a vivid and unpleasant memory but would it be classed as abuse these days? He didn't speak or touch me so I suppose not but it certainly affected me.

Grandola Thank you for trusting us all,

Mishap I think incidents like that take you completely by surprise and you can be stunned into silence. A common reaction probably.

Sorry to hear of your experiences grandola - I think they highlight the problem that children very often have - they do not know what is appropriate and what isn't. After all healthy sex goes on in private, so how can they know what is going on behind closed doors and which activities might be OK or not?

When I was a grown adult (probably in my 40s) I saw a hospital specialist in a city away from here - he examined my abdomen without a chaperone and then ran his hands over my breasts (I had a bra on) - it had no relevance at all to his examination or the problem that I was there with. I said and did nothing - why? I cannot answer that. I think I just wanted out of there and could not face the ensuing hassle.

I was a grown up but still I chose to do nothing. It harmed me in no way, but was entirely inappropriate; and I did not know whether he might do worse to someone more vulnerable than I.

Grandola you are so right about this place being good for one's emotional health, I've found that too.

from me to you.

And me, Grandola , it must have taken a lot of soul-searching to make your post.

Grandola more from me.