Bank of gran and grandad

If grandparents can afford to help their DGC financially, and want to do so, then of course they should offer it.
Parents, tho, shouldn't feel entitled to expect it and definitely shouldn't put on pressure.
Asking is one thing, pressurising is quite another.

If DC tried to pressurise me to pay anything I would promptly suggest that I might change my will.

We too are putting money aside on a regular basis for DGC post school lives and DC have never asked us for money. They know we share when we can.

Our GC are at different types of schools with one recently started at an independent (highly academic school which was the only criterion to move him).

We are in a position to help financially and have done so in various ways in the past, as DH wants to leave as small an amount of dosh as possible when he/we, permanently depart.

In no way was there an assumption by our DC that financial help would be forthcoming. We tried to ensure that the reverse was true, instilling a strong work ethic, as we think it appalling if DC assume money will come their way by right, so they were all pleasantly surprised when £ did come into their lives.

Our DC work very hard, as I am sure many do, too! My point being that they don't need to, but choose to do so.

My DH says there is no point in being the richest shroud in the cemetery so why not distribute some of it now.

Most GP love their family and obviously everyone's circumstances are different. If one can help, then do so but the DC should not expect or assume anything and should be ashamed if they feel it their right to pressurise their parents.