*DURHAMGEN FOR PM ??*

Can I claim my new dress on expenses please? It is nice and will look great on TV.

Who are the back b enchers - I think we will need a very firm whip to keep some of them in order.
whitewave see other thread about whether or not a 4 year old should be able to whip their own bottom.
Should it be a requirement for all us new MPSs do you think?

Money will always talk though. If only life was so straightforward that everyone just paid their dues. The really wealthy will always find ways to stash it. Cynical? Moi?

Best hang on until you find which party is the favourite for oversea tax dodgers , so far you have the choice of Tory and UKIP, but who knows what else will be revealed

Ah but we are coming to get you!

Whoever will make me Lady Jane is fine by me. All my dosh is safely tied up overseas so it doesn't really matter to me who's nominally in power.

Are you undecided Jane?

Who do I make the cheque payable to?

To be sure of a peerage just donate lots of money

Who are the back b enchers - I think we will need a very firm whip to keep some of them in order. That or a promise of a peerage or something.

Sorry ma'am. Almost forgot myself for a minute

No. In fact, you can't even claim for a first one - surely you didn't go into politics for the perks?

Now, now, whitewave.
We are going to behave in our parliament. No scandals
Wherever it is, we will build or buy a Premier Inn type place, so all MPs have a reasonable room to sleep in close to the parliament building.
No expenses scandals for us.

Can I now claim for a second house please?

OK, nominated
Order Order!!

I want to be Speaker.

Hmmmm. Interesting plan but would that mean DH would have to be SirDH?

Yes, that thought did cross my mind Ana

The abolition of the House of Lords will probably be a priority for this new regime! You could just change your name by deed poll, Jane - they can't touch you for that...

Correction - or the House of Lords and Baronesses!

You can be who or whatever you like Jane10

(on this thread, anyway )

ps why isn't it the House of Lords and Ladies or the House of Lords. And why are the female Lords called Baronesses if a Baron is lower in rank than a Lord?
Anyone know?

Can I be in the House of Lords? I've always secretly wanted to be LadyJane!
No? Thought not

(Samworth/Ginsters) in Melton Mowbray?

I do hope they are not trying to pass off Leicestershire pasties as Cornish

We can't have that - I vote myself in as Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs!
No tax, I promise

Oh, perhaps that should be 'hear, hear'.

Here, here. Motion passed.