Gransnet forums

News & politics

Why is it so difficult to say sorry?

(9 Posts)
Mattsmum2 Thu 24-Jun-21 13:27:15

The forced adoption scandal is heartbreaking to hear and devastating for all those involved.

Why can’t nations where this happened, just say ‘sorry ‘ for past events?
New Zealand has so why can’t others?

Ilovecheese Thu 24-Jun-21 14:08:29

I don't understand this resistance to saying sorry either. It looks to me like false pride. What harm does it do to anyone when it could make some people feel a little bit better that we as a country are recognising that they suffered. Why can't we show a bit of humility and compassion as a nation instead of trying to hang on to some ridiculous idea of dignity or placing the blame on individuals instead of taking responsibility.

sodapop Thu 24-Jun-21 15:04:50

This is being covered on the forced adoption thread.
I don't see any point in a meaningless set of words being delivered by someone who was not involved and really couldn't care.

Namsnanny Thu 24-Jun-21 15:07:42

Me neither sodapop
As one who was apologised to on numerous occasions in RL only to encounter the same difficulties over and over again, I'm sceptical when I hear it.

25Avalon Thu 24-Jun-21 15:08:44

I tend to agree with Sodapop. “Fine words butter no parsnips” as the old saying goes.

Calendargirl Thu 24-Jun-21 15:42:38

My opinion on this matter is already on the Forced Adoptions thread.

Saying sorry by people not remotely involved is pointless and meaningless,

AGAA4 Thu 24-Jun-21 15:45:43

'Sorry' can't heal the years of heartache those poor women suffered.

eazybee Thu 24-Jun-21 18:17:33

What is the point of an apology? Adoption was encouraged at the time because it was genuinely felt that it gave the child a better chance in life.
What is more important is that lessons have been learned, and women in that situation no longer have to undergo this trauma.

M0nica Thu 24-Jun-21 18:30:40

I think all these apolgies for tragic things that happened in the past devalues the apology.

Few if any of the people doing the apologising were alive then all they are doing is mouthing words.

My sympathy for the women and children involved is immense, but at the time it was done, probably 90% of the population, including in many cases the parents of these mothers thought what they were doing was the best solution for mother and baby.

What are we doing now, that everyone agrees is 'for the best' that in 50 years will be viewed with horror?