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Buckingham Palace Aide resigns

(1001 Posts)
Parsley3 Wed 30-Nov-22 14:12:28

BBC News - Buckingham Palace aide resigns over remarks to black charity boss
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63810468

Well at least the Palace took this incident seriously and didn't fob off Ms Fulani's complaint.

Elegran Thu 01-Dec-22 09:48:42

Aveline

Curiouser and curiouser. Fulani was wearing a wire apparently and has a mission to find and call out racism.

I thought it was illegal to record someone without their permission?

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:48:20

eazybee

I am curious as to why the woman in question couldn't or wouldn't answer the questions from Lady Hussey.

Because it's none of Lady's Hussey's business?

Grany Thu 01-Dec-22 09:47:53

No actual apology from Firm about the Royal Families racism and colonialism past.

DaisyAnne Thu 01-Dec-22 09:47:20

volver

People get the spelling of my first name wrong all the time. I can think of eight different ways of spelling my traditional Scottish maiden surname, and I've had them all. (Mc/Mac/capital letter next/lower case letter next/spelling according to place of origin)

Maybe I'm just touchy. Or just concerned that people show a bit of respect for others?

Or touchy and overly concerned for others. Reasonable concern is okay, but I don't think there is a person on this thread that hasn't agreed it is time for Lady Susan to step down.

I have a strong feeling there will be a backlash against the other women (I now dare not even try to write her name - does the criticising pf spelling really help her?). I doubt she will understand why as she if very much of her generation just as Lady Susan (leave out the surname just in case) is of hers.

Elegran Thu 01-Dec-22 09:47:05

Her name was spelt "Ngosi" in several places in the media. In this thread it has been spelt both with an S and with a Z. I chose the S - am I racist for that?

Had she been Siobhan or Sian many people would pronounce that wrongly. Should she have the vapours as a result?

eazybee Thu 01-Dec-22 09:45:52

I am curious as to why the woman in question couldn't or wouldn't answer the questions from Lady Hussey.

Tweedle24 Thu 01-Dec-22 09:42:51

DaisyAnne

vegansrock

Understanding a different background and culture? Hmmm, so if some privileged old white person thinks anyone with dark skin can’t possibly be British or hail from Hackney we have to tolerate this and not call it out?

I did not say we should tolerate this. I just don't understand the level of hate in the way you decide it is your job to "call out" an elderly lady because she got it wrong. Obviously, you never do and you, I assume, believe that you will keep completely up to the way of thinking with every year you get older.

I wonder how best we could describe you.

DaisyAnne. I agree. Whilst I understand that what was said was not in the least bit acceptable and Lady Susan was right to resign, it all seems to have gone too far. The woman who was questioned has said she regretted the resignation, but it seems some others feel that the vitriol poured on the elderly Lady Susan is justifiable.

Both parties have suffered as a result of the incident. Shouldn’t that be enough?

Aveline Thu 01-Dec-22 09:42:46

Curiouser and curiouser. Fulani was wearing a wire apparently and has a mission to find and call out racism.

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:37:00

Ok, does she have Alzheimer's as well as being deaf?

Any more excuses before we move on?

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:35:08

People get the spelling of my first name wrong all the time. I can think of eight different ways of spelling my traditional Scottish maiden surname, and I've had them all. (Mc/Mac/capital letter next/lower case letter next/spelling according to place of origin)

Maybe I'm just touchy. Or just concerned that people show a bit of respect for others?

Elegran Thu 01-Dec-22 09:34:14

merlotgran

I doubt Lady Susan will get the chance to explain her side of things. The transcript doesn’t put her in a good light but I’ve read that her task at palace functions when the Queen was alive was to find out a guest’s background before introducing her and be on hand to make sure the conversation flowed easily because guests often became tongue tied.

Her tactics were clearly out of line on this occasion and it all went horribly wrong. Time to step down but I can’t help feeling she has been treated rather harshly.

I didn't know of Lady Susan's task at palace functions was previously "to find out a guest’s background before introducing her and be on hand to make sure the conversation flowed easily because guests often became tongue tied" when I posted on 30-Nov-22 20:26:31 but that is exactly what I imagined she thought she was doing at this event. Old ladies often revert to their old patterns when in the same situation as they used to be in.
My aunt had been the much-loved president of the local WI and had always been very active at meet-and-greet and welcoming new members. In her eighties she became less mentally alert, and moved into a care home - where she is fondly remembered for continuing to welcome people into the common room and chatting to those she thought were new members and finding them a seat. Perhaps some GN members will still be sharp enough at that age not to continue doing what they have done well and effectively for decades, and get it wrong because they are no longer able to change track in mid-conversation, but they would be the lucky ones.

Being inclusive of all means not condemning people with Altzheimers for their illness, as well as not excluding people for their colour or creed.

DaisyAnne Thu 01-Dec-22 09:33:06

GrannyGravy13

volver

There might just be a little bit of correlation between old ladies asking inappropriate questions of black people, and others who can't get those black people's names right because they are "so foreign".

My words. Nobody needs to get indignant about it.

My name is a traditional English name, if only I had a £ each time it is spelt wrongly.

People constantly mispronounce mine. It's not English in origin though, perhaps I should take umbridge each time? GrannyGravy

If you want to hear a load of tosh, come to GN, apparently.

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:31:31

Ngozi. Ngozi. NGOZI!!

(Has a fit of the vapours and goes to lie down...)

DaisyAnne Thu 01-Dec-22 09:30:14

volver

There might just be a little bit of correlation between old ladies asking inappropriate questions of black people, and others who can't get those black people's names right because they are "so foreign".

My words. Nobody needs to get indignant about it.

Oh, for God's sake. What will you make up as "your truth" next! You have now managed to insult every dyslexic by suggesting their inability to carry a word may be because they are fundamentally racist.

What will you come out with next!

Smileless2012 Thu 01-Dec-22 09:29:51

I agree GrannyGravy that the media is blowing this up out of all proportion with the assistance of Ngosi Fulani.

Apparently she's sad that Susan Hussey has resigned, seeing her age as being a contributory factor to what took place, so why not leave it at that.

GrannyGravy13 Thu 01-Dec-22 09:26:20

volver

There might just be a little bit of correlation between old ladies asking inappropriate questions of black people, and others who can't get those black people's names right because they are "so foreign".

My words. Nobody needs to get indignant about it.

My name is a traditional English name, if only I had a £ each time it is spelt wrongly.

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:22:57

There might just be a little bit of correlation between old ladies asking inappropriate questions of black people, and others who can't get those black people's names right because they are "so foreign".

My words. Nobody needs to get indignant about it.

DaisyAnne Thu 01-Dec-22 09:21:11

There is certainly a word for those who highlight other's mistakes volver.

Right, time to go off and do something that actually makes a difference. Gossip only goes so far, doesn't it?

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:20:33

The Queen was.

Maybe read my post again.

Aldom Thu 01-Dec-22 09:19:30

Susan Hussey Born 1st May 1939. She is not a product of the 1920's.

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:17:24

Is there an "ism" for people who consistently get a person's name wrong even although they have been told several times what that person's name is?

Ngozi. Ngozi

DaisyAnne Thu 01-Dec-22 09:17:18

Supernan

Can I just add that I take the suggestion that that this happened because of her age deeply insulting. It’s blatant ageism and what she did is racism.

Define racism and how it applies to the conversation we have so far only heard one side of.

Age is relevant. We all grew up in different times and the changes younger people decide they need to remain stable human beings are not ours. Sometimes people cannot or do not absorb the changes. That is why we/I were/was taught to respect age as it exists, not to attack the outcome of a previous "culture".

If allowing for our differences of background and upbringing has to stop then I, for one, think this has become a lesser society. It appears, however that one person in the conversation did expect their background and upbringing to be taken into account. She just did not expect to have to return the favour.

Yammy Thu 01-Dec-22 09:16:59

Whitewavemark2

volver

Would she have asked a white woman at that reception what nationality she was, where she was really from, when she came to this country? After being told she was British?

No, she wouldn't.

So she was being racist. By definition. 🤷

Yes

I agree she was racist but I think she might have been gauche enough to ask anyone without a received accent which part of Britain they were from.
I got asked at least once a week when I did not live in my own county. To Most people, Geordies are anyone from Northumberland to Teesside they are not. Brummies are the whole of the west Midland again not.
I was constantly being asked if we were Scandi when shopping with a friend when we used our local accent. We might have been at least a thousand years ago. I never hear my accent on TV unless it is Country file , no one can reproduce it.
She has left the way open for Megan to start complaining again.
Perhaps an elderly lady who should have been retired.

Zoejory Thu 01-Dec-22 09:13:53

Did any Native Americans have anything to say?

volver Thu 01-Dec-22 09:13:38

One thing nobody has mentioned yet.

We had the same HoS for 70 years. The people she surrounded herself with grew up in an era of deference and Empire. She expected a certain attitude and way of behaving. She seems to have been quite content to stay out of the way when her consort behaved in a particular way and said things which might be considered unacceptable in a modern country in the 21st Century.

So perhaps Lady Susan, a senior member of the Royal hierarchy, was behaving exactly as she has always behaved for the last 70 years, but nobody has told her before that its unacceptable nowadays.

Perhaps having a person born in the 1920s as the top of society's pyramid for all these years, with all that soft power, has stopped certain parts of our society from developing into as forward thinking and woke (ha ha) a society as some of us would like.

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