Ban on corporal punishment towards children

It's all connected. Sometimes violence breeds gentleness and sometimes violence breeds violence. Other factors outside the home must make the difference

Smacking, hitting, shoving, belittling, spanking, are all forms of child abuse. These are methods used by parents who have not been educated in loving methods of raising offspring.

They used to call it ‘a good hiding’. Nothing good about it.

nanna8

They used to call it ‘a good hiding’. Nothing good about it.

No. The language around these things is so important, IMO. The very fact that there is special vocabulary to describe hitting children speaks for itself.

If the same terms were applied to hitting vulnerable old people who were irritating younger ones, refusing to do as they were told, expressing annoyance or frustration because their bodies were unable to do what their minds wanted them to do, there would be an outcry. What’s the difference? Hitting is wrong, and hitting those who are weaker than you is worse.

My mother was always smacking me. It sucked a lot of my love for her out of me. When I had my daughter one day I raised my hand to her and smacked her on the leg. It all came back to me as I raised my hand again, and I wept. I never smacked her again and she has no memory of it. When her brother came along I never smacked him. If I was angry with them I told them to remove themselves from my sight for a whilst we all calmed down. My children have never smacked their children, obviously nor have I. My children and grandchildren are all level headed people and we are very close. Why smack a child? If an adult berated you would you smack them, I think not.

I doubt a ban would affect child murder. It's not enough to ban smacking: there needs to be real help for parents at their wits' end when faced with a challenging child. Sure Start was one such scheme which delivered a one stop shop for poorer parents but which was ditched by the Tories in favour of cheap childminding - warehousing kids so parents could be got into work.

Not talking about abuse and murder. Talking about the sharp reaction to smacking vs public indifference parental break up.

I was smacked once as a child, for going to the lake, which was forbidden. I also occasionally smacked my children, but knew even at the time that it was mainly because of the mood I was in, and if I had been less stressed or tired I wouldn’t have hit them.

I do laugh thinking of when I was working with families in prison, and discussing disciplining children.
Said the wee prisoner,’Well, ma da skelped ( smacked) me, an’ that didnae dae me any harm’
His wife replied, ‘ Didnae dae you any good but, you’re in the f*ckin’ jail’.

Countries that have banned smacking have already reported less instances of child abuse

My daughter is against smacking. One day her son hit his sister so she told him off. She realised that as she was saying 'it is wrong to hit anyone', she was 'tapping' his hand!

That's interesting DaisyDaisyDoo could you point me to a link for that? I've had a Google search for it but couldn't find anything. Which countries is this in and is that only parent on child abuse or child abuse in general? I did find that there's evidence to show that, in countries that have full bans on smacking, rates of physical fighting among adolescents are up to 69% lower however, which is encouraging.

www.acamh.org/blog/why-its-good-to-ban-smacking/

Further information would be useful DaisyDaisyDo.

That is as you say encouraging Grunty.

Thank you. I notice that the report states is associated with lower levels of physical child abuse referencing Bussman et al, 2011.

It's good that the affect on children of verbal abuse is also covered. 'Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me' never has been true.

According to my siblings, we were smacked occasionally, but Mum used the go to your room punishment, which is what I remember.
I didn’t smack mine, and I’m glad to see the ban in place but I’d still like more information of the policing and punishment for those accused of smacking.

For example, what impact has the ban in Scotland had? How has it been managed?

A ban with no consequences is just words.

Thanks for thatDaisyDaisyDoo but it wasn't quite what I was looking for; it only echos banning smacking is associated with lower rates of physical child abuse (Bussman et al, 2011). I think that the link below provides more comprehensive and compelling evidence because it actually provides and compares actual scientific research data gathered from 5 European countries. Different types of punishments are compared, the long term effects of that on the child, and society as a whole. Have a look:
www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://gruppocrc.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Bussman_-_Europe_5_nation_report_2009.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwiNlqW3hKKJAxVga0EAHUwJCuwQFnoECBMQAQ&usg=AOvVaw00yEEBFV5DCAis0gSQ25Zw

Thank you

Mollygo

MayBee70
The only girl in my daughter’s class that hit other children was one whose stepfather used to smack her.

That’s worrying. By that reckoning I have had many classes over the years, even till 2024, where lots of the children must have been /are being smacked at home, in order for them to justify their hitting, elbowing and kicking others in school.
None of them have told me that they do it because they get smacked or hit or elbowed or pushed or kicked at home.
We are very alert to behaviours which might indicate problems with home life, not just bruises, though I’ve seen some of those.

I was never smacked by my parents but I was smacked in school...early 1960's.

I've never forgotten it because I was so shocked.
It was in primary school, I was entering a classroom after a break. The teacher was behind the door and the edge of the door bumped her slightly. She virtually lifted me by one arm, spinning me around as she did and smacked me really hard on the back of my legs twice.
I actually had a wheal it was so hard.

I ran to my father at home time showing him the marks and to this day I can remember his anger that someone had raised a hand to me!

I was smacked in school too in the early 60s. Each Friday was a spelling test out of 10. Once marked everyone stood up. Those that got 10 were told to sit down. Those that got 9 - told to sit down … and so it went until it got to 5 - anyone with less than 5 got smacked the appropriate number of times they got their spellings wrong. She used to lift the boys trousers to smack the skin. The humiliation. I did learn to spell pretty fast after that though. I’ve never forgotten it. I would be about 9.

I remember my favourite teacher hitting me because I pointed out that the word ‘friend’ had an ‘I’ in it. I was five, and had learned to read before going to school but must have expected it to be phonetic.

I was so upset that the ‘lovely’ Miss Wotsit (I can’t remember her name, probably because of the betrayal I felt at her behaviour) chose to hit me instead of explaining.

I also remember a sadistic male teacher (unusual in those days at primary school) choosing a particular boy to come to the front of the class and work out maths problems just before playtime. The boy struggled with maths and we were all held back every time. Once he (the boy) held out his hand and asked to be caned instead of keeping the whole class in. Even the awful Mr D had the grace to be list for words.

Why was that acceptable?

Posters reporting being smacked in school as children are quite shocking. Children were sent to the headmaster to be caned in my primary school, which I think was out of order, but luckily for me, I never was. Some of these reports are quite shocking, especially to me, as an ex teacher. Being smacked because you got your spellings wrong, I’m lost for words. We had to write out the wrong spellings several times, ten I think, to try to remember them correctly.
When I went to my senior school, there was never any physical punishment. It was an all girls school, did that make a difference? We had detentions, that was the punishment, but you normally had to get three black debit marks before detention, if I remember correctly. We also had a house system, and could get credit marks, white marks, and black marks lowered to the total for the term.

Smacking is wrong. I did it on a few occasions when my children were pre-11 years old. I am deeply ashamed and have apologized to them both. They each said "Don't worry we probably deserved it." It is the parent who is out of control when smacking happens. Oddly friends without children seem to be all for it. I was criticized at lunch one day when out with a group of friends. They were all talking about the idea that children should be smacked and that it hadn't done them any harm. Three of them didn't have children. They turned to me and scathingly asked for my opinion. I just told them that if they did to an adult what they were proposing should happen to children in our care, then they could be arrested for assault.

Well, to be fair, the same could be said about any punishments.

Sending people to a room with the instruction they're not to come out until you tell them.

Taking their belongings from them because they won't do as you say.

No punishments are particularly jolly.

I went to an all girls convent schoolmaddy and some nuns. Could be vicious with the tawse ..a heavy leather belt with one end that had two straps .It was used in all Scottish schools that I know of until I left in 1969.Thankfully I was never victim to it ,the one and only time I was smacked I was about two and a half and my sister who had learned the F word in the playground taught it to me .Unfortunately I repeated it at the dinner table and an auntie kept asking me to say it again …which I did and she brought it my dads attention.He took me to my room and smacked me ..then he sat beside me on the bed and cried with me.I have always remembered it vividly .
He was such a gentle man and he never lifted a finger to any of us before or after that day I never swore again either even now the family know not to swear in my home

maddyfour

Posters reporting being smacked in school as children are quite shocking. Children were sent to the headmaster to be caned in my primary school, which I think was out of order, but luckily for me, I never was. Some of these reports are quite shocking, especially to me, as an ex teacher. Being smacked because you got your spellings wrong, I’m lost for words. We had to write out the wrong spellings several times, ten I think, to try to remember them correctly.
When I went to my senior school, there was never any physical punishment. It was an all girls school, did that make a difference? We had detentions, that was the punishment, but you normally had to get three black debit marks before detention, if I remember correctly. We also had a house system, and could get credit marks, white marks, and black marks lowered to the total for the term.

Indeed. Shocking.

I can't imagine why any grown adult (parent, teacher, grandparent) would lower their standards to ever smacking/ swatting/ caning/ hitting/ beating/ abusing anyone especially a child.

We'd no physical punishment at school, apart from tapping our hands at the desk -- far beyond what I find acceptable. Use words.