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Bin face's manifesto.

(130 Posts)
MissAdventure Mon 27-Jul-26 17:49:22

immediately crashing

His full manifesto reads as follows:

I will boost the region’s economy, prestige and fame.
I will cut your taxes, and raise everyone else’s.
Bus fares to be capped at £1.99, and 99 Flake ice-creams to cost no more than 99p.
I promise to spend more time in Clacton-on-Sea than in Washington DC, and to champion the area.
MPs who resign mid-parliament to be barred from the resulting by-election.
MPs who change party mid-parliament to be forced to face a by-election.
I pledge to build at least one affordable house.
Arcade grabber games to be made fairer so players actually have a chance to win.
Oil and gas companies to pay for solar panels for everyone. (From Jack, aged 10)
Regeneration of Walton Pier so it is just as great as Clacton Pier.
A windfall tax on cosy crime novels written (or 'written') by celebrities.
Potholes to be filled, using copies of the 2024 Labour Party Manifesto.
Parliament to be moved to my new Bin HQ, in Weeley, while the Palace of Westminster is restored.
People who drive past Clacton station with annoyingly loud exhausts to lose their licence.
I will not accept £5million gifts from crypto billionaires (on Earth).
A referendum on whether Pluto should regain its planet status.
The hand-dryer in the gents’ toilet at the Great Himalayas restaurant, Southport to be moved to a more sensible position.
Wayne Rooney to be new expert summariser for the BBC at Eurovision.
Count Binface to represent the UK at Eurovision 2027, with Clacton hosting Eurovision 2028.
I stand by my past manifestos: Ceefax, speakerphones, nationalising Adele, renaming HS2 ‘FFS!’, the hand-dryer at the Crown and Treaty, I’ve got it covered.

MaizieD Tue 28-Jul-26 12:05:54

nanna8

Just because Farage is a dick doesn’t mean another dick should also stand.

Count Binface has been standing in parliamentary elections for years, (previously as Lord Buckethead until someone claimed copyright of the name). Joke candidates are something of a British institution. There are plenty more among the 34 election candidates for this by election. Binface has just captured people's imaginations.

As others have said, it's Farage who is making a fool of himself and cynically using the good people of Clacton. I very much hope he loses, though I doubt if he will.

GrannyGravy13 Tue 28-Jul-26 12:01:02

nanna8 👏👏👏

I think you have just got a hole in one

nanna8 Tue 28-Jul-26 11:54:05

Just because Farage is a dick doesn’t mean another dick should also stand.

Maremia Tue 28-Jul-26 11:50:04

Yes, this is all on Farage.

JenniRen Tue 28-Jul-26 11:47:10

If I lived in that constituency I'd most definitely vote for Count Binface for at least two of the reasons

'People who drive past Clacton station with annoyingly loud exhausts to lose their licence.'
That should be brought in throughout the UK.

'A referendum on whether Pluto should regain its planet status'.
So unfair on Pluto to be relegated to a dwarf planet just because the neighbourhood it lives in is overcrowded.

And 99p 99s especially in this weather.

GrannyGravy13 Tue 28-Jul-26 11:38:12

M0nica

GrannyGravy13

Yes his manifesto is funny.

In my opinion it is making a mockery of the people of Clacton, as is Nigel Farage with his resignation which has caused this by-election. Which he has compounded by standing again…

No, it is Farage who is making a mockery of the people of Clacton.

Count Binface and the other 'alternative' parties standing against him are doing the equivalent of throwing eggs at Farage for treating his constituents with such disrespect. If I lived in the constituency I would be working enthusiasticly for one of the alternative candidates, any of whom, if elected, will probably provide the area with a much better constituency MP than the one who has just resigned.

M0nica I said that Nigel Farage was making a mockery of the political system…

Basgetti Tue 28-Jul-26 11:24:30

nanna8

I think this is making a mockery of the voting system. Peoples’ lives are at stake. Just not funny. Not even for the ‘British ironic sense of humour’

Yes, Farage is making a mockery of the voting system by forcing this ridiculous by-election.

Hope the Count gives him a run for his money.
Zelensky won 🤷‍♀️

Basgetti Tue 28-Jul-26 11:22:12

JaneJudge

what will happen if he gets voted in? because surely he stands a chance?

He’ll be an MP.

Shinamae Tue 28-Jul-26 10:51:50

Absolutely spot-on, just showing that politics in this country is an absolute joke….(it would be funny if our political system wasn’t so dire)

AGAA4 Tue 28-Jul-26 10:48:08

Farage's contempt for the people of Clacton deserves to be ridiculed. He has used them for his own benefit and has done nothing at all for them.

Binface is just pointing out how useless Farage is. Farage's manifesto is more laughable than that of Binface as he has not fulfilled any of it.

M0nica Tue 28-Jul-26 10:28:22

GrannyGravy13

Yes his manifesto is funny.

In my opinion it is making a mockery of the people of Clacton, as is Nigel Farage with his resignation which has caused this by-election. Which he has compounded by standing again…

No, it is Farage who is making a mockery of the people of Clacton.

Count Binface and the other 'alternative' parties standing against him are doing the equivalent of throwing eggs at Farage for treating his constituents with such disrespect. If I lived in the constituency I would be working enthusiasticly for one of the alternative candidates, any of whom, if elected, will probably provide the area with a much better constituency MP than the one who has just resigned.

nanna8 Tue 28-Jul-26 10:28:14

I think this is making a mockery of the voting system. Peoples’ lives are at stake. Just not funny. Not even for the ‘British ironic sense of humour’

Oreo Tue 28-Jul-26 10:01:29

Of course NF will win, but I expect Binface will be voted for by many who are angry with him for calling this by-election.

Graphite Tue 28-Jul-26 09:59:08

I don’t think Count Binface could enter Parliament for a number of reasons.

• He isn’t standing under his real name.

• The rules say that members should dress in business-like attire although this need not include a tie.

• Members must not in principle have their face covered while voting in a division since they must identify themselves to the tellers.

AFAIK, Jon Harvey has not indicated that he wants to be an MP.

We shall see. Reform are pretty desperate now, bringing in activists from all around the country to door knock, although they haven’t been given the right script.

When Essex County Councillor for Maldon, Justin Jay door-knocked an elderly gentlemen, he got more than he bargained for.

x.com/MittensOff/status/2080220176276955557

The thing that made me laugh most, apart from when the gentleman told Jay he was talking b*llocks, was when he asked what Farage had done for Clacton. Jay replied, That’s something you will have to ask Nigel about.

They have been sent out to campaign and can’t say one thing that he’s done for his constituents in two years ... because the short answer is: Nothing.

I expect Farage will win and, in a way, I hope he does so the investigation into the £5 million bung can continue. There’s no question in my mind that he should have declared the money. If the Standards Committee recommended a suspension of 10 days or more and there’s a successful recall petition, there will be a traditionally contested by-election. I read that Giles Watling, the previous Tory MP for Clacton, is prepared to stand against.

The candidate people need to be very careful about is Pamela Walford. She claims to be independent. However, she stood for Reform in Maldon in the GE on a platform of blaming migrants for everything. She was former Leave.EU and Farage benefactor Arron Banks' election agent in last year’s West of England Mayoral contest. Her social media is all about Reform. Unless she’s had an epiphany, I think she’s a Reform ringer, stalking horse, back up, call it what you will, in case Farage walks away or is arrested before 13th August.

Both the previous and current government have pumped millions into the constituency to improve things and work is being done by the Town Council but Farage takes no interest. has never attended a meeting although invited to do so.

Clacton deserves someone better than him who will do their job.

Oreo Tue 28-Jul-26 09:53:54

I think he will do very well on the 6 th August, I will be away so won’t see all the excitement but a short break from any politics will be good for the soul I think.

MawsRosie Tue 28-Jul-26 09:45:45

It makes a lot of sense to me - especially, absolutely seriously the one about MPs who switch party having to face a by election.
Oh and 99s

AGAA4 Tue 28-Jul-26 09:44:34

That is why Farage is no good for them. Binface is just a joke but I hope Clacton will consider another serious option for their PM.
Being happy with someone who scorns them while lining his own pockets seems a bit mad to me.

MissAdventure Tue 28-Jul-26 09:36:54

I agree.
Clacton has all kinds of issues; prolems with poverty, drugs, inadequate housing, people who really need help to try and break the cycle, and live well, with productive lives and prospects.
Many are lacking the very basics.

fancythat Tue 28-Jul-26 09:31:18

They are happy, so that is good enough for me.

Voting for a joke candidate? Come on people and posters.

AGAA4 Tue 28-Jul-26 08:53:01

What had Farage done for Clacton with his manifesto of false promises fancythat

LizzieDrip Tue 28-Jul-26 08:52:49

Good folk of Clacton please, please, please vote for Count Binface🙏🙏🙏

He’d get my vote 💯%

fancythat Tue 28-Jul-26 08:48:08

AGAA4

I would vote for Binface. He would be a much better MP for Clacton than Farage who has no interest in the people there at all.

You dont care about manifestos at all?

fancythat Tue 28-Jul-26 08:47:25

Binface that is.

fancythat Tue 28-Jul-26 08:46:52

If he wins, does he actually want the job?

AGAA4 Tue 28-Jul-26 08:46:52

I would vote for Binface. He would be a much better MP for Clacton than Farage who has no interest in the people there at all.