Would anyone else....

We included this poem in my youngest sons' (Jack, aged 19) order of service. I posted it on Gransnet a while ago, on another thread and another Gransnetter who had lost a grandson pm'd me to say how much it struck a chord with her. It has been 3 years since Jack died, but I still think this poem strikes the right note. (I believe it was used at the late Queen Mothers funeral?)

“You can shed tears that he is gone,
or you can smile because he has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that he'll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all he's left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see him,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember him only that he is gone,
or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what he'd want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.”

Greenmossgiel Just a thought, but have you thought about changing the thread title? It may be that you are wanting to be subtle re. Gally, but some poeple that may want to contribute might overlook it?

Could just be me, so feel free to ignore!

(As you were, troops.)

phoenix
I have not seen that before. My dH died 9years ago. That embodies the way I have tried to live. I still miss him, but I go on. I also try to keep a GSOH!

jeni Sorry for your loss, and I completely understand that you still miss him, as indeed I do my son. I feel that it is a poem that (in most cases) the person who has gone would approve of, if that makes any sense?

As mentioned, I have posted this poem before on here, but for the life of me I can't remember on which thread, but perhaps it (the poem) is one that can stand repeating.

I think so. I have sometimes felt guilty about not continuing to grieve! But I think this way is better and definitely what he would have wanted.
People who he confided in have told me he was worried about how I would cope without him. They all now tell me, he would have been proud
,
I wonder why? Didn't he realise how strong and independant I am.
I am me. I will survive!

I'm not sure what has happened to Gally but from the reactions here it must have been something truly terrible so I definitely wish to express my good wishes although I don't know this lady and will make a contribution to the RNLI.

Her husband died very suddenly susie

OH dear poor lady. I am very sorry please add my condolences.

Thank you for the reminder...I love the poem and will keep a copy.
I will of course be making a donation to RNLI . I hope Gally is coping..when someone dies suddenly I think it is so much worse for the loved ones, whereas with a terminal illness you grieve a little everyday and after the shock of diagnosis and treasure your time together. Does this make sense ?
I am just talking from my experience of my father dying suddenly at 52 when I was 20 and the devastating shock which I don't think I have ever really got over...but Phil and I treasure (not in a soppy verbal way) the time we have left together.
Thinking of Gally and her family xx

Tosh, thank you. I'm pulling together a file of 'pieces' that some of us have written. These will go to Gally when the time is right for her. I'll add your name to those who have donated to RNLI.
I hope things are now a bit easier for you and your husband and that he's a bit more comfortable.

green posted mine to you this morning, thank you for doing all the hard work in organising the file

Thanks, glass. I'll watch out for Jockie the Postie on Monday. I've written out a list of all who have donated to RNLI, taking into account those who mentioned donating on the earlier thread, 'Gally's Quilt'. When I meet up with Gally again, I'll give her the file with any letters etc that have been sent to me for her. So far there have been an unbelievable 31 donations from gransnetters. I'll put the list in the file as well. Thank you. xx

Have just donated to RNLI green

Thank you Seventimesfive - I'll pop your name on the list. Just to remind anyone who would like to send me anything to put in the file, please pm me for my address? Would like to think we could maybe get it all done within the next week or so, if possible? Thank you.

Greenmossgiel have received and replied to (twice, as I had another thought!) your p.m.

Thanks phoenix! I think if we can just keep this thread going, hopefully everyone who would like to add a piece to Gally's file will see it, and pm me for my address if they would like to.

Thanks green for organising everything. My little GD said this at my mother's funeral which was well received by those present:

Those we love don't go away
They walk beside us every day
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
Still loved, still missed and very dear

My bit will be in the post tomorrow.

Thanks Ariadne. I'll let you know when it arrives.
Goldengirl - that's a lovely thing for a little one to stand up and say for her Great-Grandma. It really says it all, doesn't it? As long as we have the memory of those we love, they'll always be close by.

I have a standing order to the RNLI, so I hope that will be ok to have my name added to the list for Gally. (My husband was [many years ago] in the RN).

Butternut - I'll add your name to Gally's list just now. Thank you.

Here is one of my favourite poems - it is by Christina Rosetti.

REMEMBER me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land.
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go, yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you plann'd.
Only remember me, you understand
It will be late to counsel then, or pray
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve.
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.








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I love that poem Greatnan. It always makes me feel a little tearful.