I came across this on a poetry page the other day, written by Alexis Riffe. It made me cry. Anything that will help, be it underwear or acceptance by other people is surely a good thing?
Day after day Deep inside, my heart is breaking Day after day, nothing seems to change A veil of blue, I must wear I hide the girl inside, with endless despair With each new day, all I wish Is that I wasn't forced to hide The young woman screaming, deep inside There are days When light breaks through The cracks in the wall I've built to protect her From the world around She begs me Pleads, to be let out But my worst fear Is that people will see her light And snuff it out Like a tender flame I've tried so hard to nurture her But all my efforts feel in vain Because so many cause her pain She doesn't exist You're a boy You were born that way, and so you will stay These words cut through my heart Threatening to tear the little girl apart She bows her head and goes to hide Crying, sometimes wishing she could die To end the pain and suffering Some days, she can't feel the warmth of the sun Other days, the sun burns through the veil she wears And she stands tall, above her fears Today, she feels crippled Lost and alone Wanting to be nestled In the arms of her adoptive momma Safe and shielded from harm
Day after day, she wonders When she will shed the veil And purge herself of the boy they all see The day that a girl is all she will be
A boy of 4 or 5 may be girlie or a girl a tomboy but they are not sexual at that age or for a good while after so why can’t they just stay girlie or tomboyish and then start to see which way they want to go after puberty Why is everyone in such a hurry to label We had a friend at 12 ish wanted to be a boy changed her name cut her hair got a girlfriend it lasted a year now she’s a girl again with makeup and painted nails Thank goodness her parents didn’t rush her off to start treatment
Bluebelle her parents couldn't have rushed her off to start treatment .Its a long drawn out process of medics and psycologists /psychiatrists.We all know tomboys or boys who aren't "butch" and they dont all go onto transgender or even be gay .A young person with gender issues KNOWS without doubt what they are and the outcome they need .
In the last 5 years I have had 3 students who either identify as trans or are probably trans. The happiest, best adjusted one, a trans boy, had parents, a school and classmates who all accepted and supported him. He had a girlfriend just like his friends and was visibly glowing from being the 'real' him.
One I had as a tutee 4 years ago was accepted as a boy by his friends and talked to me about his issues. But was too scared to approach his parents. His school work suffered and he was unable to engage in normal teenage courtship rituals.
The student I currently teach, a trans girl, has horrific behaviour problems at school. Bordering on permanent exclusion. I've never discussed it directly with her because she hasn't approached me, BUT I've complimented her on her eyebrows (eyebrows are a HUGE make-up trend ATM) and once on her lip gloss. In my lessons, all of her behaviour issues have disappeared. She and her friends regularly turn up in my classroom at break/lunch for a chat. A little acceptance goes a long way.
Children begin to acquire their gender identity at 13 months. My grandson, who lives with just me and his mum, mimics our actions and consequently has a toy kitchen / pushchair that he loves. But he's 100% boy. He LOVES men and is very boyish in his behaviour.
I have a friend whose child (bio female, trans boy) who decided he was a boy at 2.
We need to allow children to be who and what they want to be. Similarly to sexual identity, normality is the message they get 99.9% of the time. If they choose a different and let's face it, hugely difficult route, it is not a fad. And if they change their minds later, fine! But that rarely happens.