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(10 Posts)
carnivalqueen Fri 01-Nov-19 16:08:19

One of the parents at my grandson's school has told my daughter-in-law that her daughter had reported to her that my 8 year old grandson is being bullied. He hasn't mentioned it and doesn't seem troubled or worried, he goes into school happily each day. He does not normally hide his emotions and they honestly believe they would know if he was bothered about something. My daughter-in-law and my son don't want to raise it directly with him as they don't want to turn it into an issue if he doesn't see it as such but in conversations have given him opportunities to tell them what's happening, he hasn't mentioned anything. None of us know the right way to proceed Should they raise it with the school, watch and wait, ask other parents if they are aware of what's going on? Any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you.

Madgran77 Fri 01-Nov-19 16:19:12

I would ask the parent what exactly the child who mentioned bullying described as a first step....

carnivalqueen Fri 01-Nov-19 16:40:57

Thanks for reply madgran. Apparently the other mum told my d-i-l that the bully had told my grandson ‘you’re dead if you come back after half term’. I don’t have anything else specific but apparently others have been asking if he’s alright. D-i-l thought it strange but just felt they were general enquires but now she’s linking it all together.

BlueBelle Fri 01-Nov-19 17:35:21

I m sure you would pick something up if he was being bullied he would be reluctant to go to school he’d be having tummy aches or not sleeping so hopefully whatever is happening he has enough confidence to sort it out for himself which is by far the best way
So personally I d keep an eye on things but not initiate any worries unless he becomes unhappy and shows signs

Liz46 Fri 01-Nov-19 17:38:14

Maybe either your son or d-i-l could contact the school. My daughter did this recently and the school were very good.

Doodle Fri 01-Nov-19 17:44:04

As the grandparent of a much bullied (for years) grandchild I would suggest the parents talk to the school. Your grandchild may be able to cope with such things but a more vulnerable child wouldn’t. In this current age of knife crime, no child should be told by another if you come back to school you’re dead. The child who said that needs to be told it is totally unacceptable (the child who said it might need help too. Not a very nice thing to say. The school should be aware)

Davidhs Fri 01-Nov-19 17:50:21

It all too much hearsay at this stage, however you have been alerted to the possibility, make discrete enquiries who is the culprit and if it happens again report it to the school. This needs nipping in the bud before it gets worse.

My eldest daughter got bullied for a while, until she lost her temper and punched the other girl in the mouth - they left her alone after that,( nearly got suspended though). The younger daughters were left alone, big sister had a reputation.

Doodle Fri 01-Nov-19 17:52:00

bluebelle have you ever had a bullied child? (Question not meant in a nasty way) because I can assure you it is no fun. If this child gets away with it his next victim might not be able to cope so well and some children are more vulnerable than others. Unfortunately, there are many of us on GN who have bullied grandchildren where the bullying has taken a severe toll on the wellbeing and happiness of our grandchildren to the point of severe mental health problems. Hopefully for carnivalqueen’s grandchild this is not the case but bullying should never be taken lightly.

Gonegirl Fri 01-Nov-19 17:55:54

I would say nothing to him or the school for the moment. It might have been a silly remark made one child. Watch him carefully after he has gone back after half term. Mum will be asking the usual "how was you're day" and I would think anything untoward would soon come out.

Gonegirl Fri 01-Nov-19 18:08:55

your not you're