recovering from betrayal.is it possible?

Well done gran7 - all the best for your future.

Does anyone know how dancingfeet is getting on?

gran7 well done. You have a home and life you can really call your own. Cheers!

Best wishes for a very happy future gran7, I hope your life will be full of joy.

gran7 - we knew you could do it! You will start to be happy again, I promise you. Don't give a backward glance at your ex - he deserves to be alone.

gran7 - Lovely to hear your news. I am sure your new friendships and new home will give you the life you want.

gran7, good luck in your new life!it sounds exciting, I'm so pleased for you.

gran7, all the nasty stuff's in the past now. Look forward to a better life for yourself.

gran7 pleased you are in and settled. Wishing you only good times in your new home and new life. Heres to the future

Hi again from me,
Good news, I have finally moved into my new home! I am still surrounded by boxes waiting to be unpacked, but I am getting there. Its been a bit of a struggle to get here, ex was being awkward about me taking what was mine and legally entitled to, but having my son there he had no option but to let us take what I wanted. He is now being nasty about some of the items, insomuch as the upright vac, I did leave one for him, just not the upright. There were a few other (little) things, but he is still working and I'm not, which don't cost a lot to replace for him. My son just told him, be thankful I left him with what I had, e.g. washing machine and fridge/freezer etc.. He now realises hes lost the best thing he ever had, but its too late now. He has to live withthe consequences of what hes done. I am happy in my new home, and free from him. It gets a bit lonely sometimes but when I think of the alternative I brighten up somewhat. I am slowly starting to make new friends, which is good.
Hoping to enrole in a college computer course in Sept. and look for some charity work.
I hope everyone is well and happy, and thank you for all your support over the last couple of months. It's been a roller coaster of a ride, but now I can see what I have done is for the best.
Thank you all again
to you all.

Gran7 from me too. Go for it, gal!!

Three cheers for you gran7. Here's to your new life. or, what the heck,

Good luck gran7

In answer to the original post title Can I add a 'Yes'! but it takes a log haul and equal determination of both parties to want it to work!

Good for you gran7 it is very liberating for you! Best wishes for the move, I hope you will be very happy in your new home.

ps. I was Nanachrissy!

You deserve a medal gran7! That's the way to do it

I think you are a new woman gran7. You sound so confident, it's wonderful

So good to hear, gran7.

Hello Ladies,
Well here is an update for you. Ihave had my hair cut to a style I chose (for a change). Seen ex who did a double take and looked as if he had been hit in the chest hard. He tried to talk to me, but I had the trength to say "excuse me, do I know you"? He looked so stunned and burst into tears in the middle of Tesco's car park. I just told him to pull himself together, got into my car and drove off. I did take a sneaky look in the mirror, and he looked so devastated and alone. Sorry ladies, but I said to myself "now you know how I have been feeling"!
I was so proud of myself. Got to my sons house and started shaking. I can't even shed tears for him anymore. More good news as well, I move into my new home next week, and have made so many plans. Yes there is definately a light getting bigger in the distance. Thanks again for all your encouragement/thoughts and prayers.
Here's to my new life

Good luck Gran7 you deserve happiness. Men always seem to underestimate us women, we are tough stuff!

You are an inspiration Gran7 and I wish you all the very best in your new life.

Well done Gran7. You will get over him and show that you can do tons better when you're aren't stifled in a marriage where there is such deceit. Being free to breathe and be yourself shouldn't be underestimated. It's fabulous!

Whenim64
I will never take him back no matter what he says or does. He has totally destroyed what we had and would never trust him. I don't trust easily anyway, so to have completely smashed it to smithereens, the pieces are to small to put back together. I have wished him well and walked away with my head high, knowing he will have to deal with whatever lies ahead for him, himself. It pained me to do it, knowing I will always have him in my heart, but as time goes on, I am getting stronger and stronger.
Thank you to everyone who wrote, prayed and thought of me in my hour of need. I will treasure your comments and stay strong and true.

Love you all.

Gran7 isn't it funny how regrets and tears always come when it's too late? My husband was the same - never made any attempt to be reasonable during our 15 years of marriage, but as soon as the divorce papers arrived he couldn't do enough. I left with the children and have avoided him for the last 20 odd years, as he met another woman a couple of years after we divorced and he treats her exactly the same - his pleas and promises to change never materialised into anything. My children have all encouraged her to leave but she thinks she is dependent on him. I am so glad I am not still stuck there with him.

Well done for having the gumption to move on with your life

I don't agree with staying for the sake of finance but I do understand the fear of being stranded this way. My DIL's mother is constantly saying to me that she is with her husband 'only for the money' and has often said she feels sorry for me to have been on my own for so many years. However, after my divorce I was able to bring up my two children with success and carve out a decent career. That way I have a state pension and two career pensions. I was only 40 years old so had time to do that. However, to have this happen in say your 60's must be really awful and frightening. Do you have a really good friend/GP/priest that you can talk to. Try not to take medication if you can help. If you want to stay with your husband you need to talk to the culprit himself and lay down a few rules. What ever you decide if must be what YOU want and you need to give yourself time to grieve and think about your future. Don't rush into anything but give it a few months to really sort it out. It's a shame you don't see much of your children too, I'd hate that most of all. A daughter especially can be so understanding. We all feel for you and you know that all us GNs will at least respond to your comments and try to help.

Gran7 and Daisy, you are two very courageous and very special people and it's a privilege to know you.

Thank you for your post Gran7. Well done indeed for what you have achieved and are still achieving. I find it a bit of a rollercoaster, probably too affected by influences beyond my control, but tell myself that without the 'downs' there wouldn't be any 'ups'.