Just when we thought he couldn't get any worse

They certainly don't deserve the title of father nina. Any father that would use his children to get a dig at their mother, with complete disregard as to the negative affect this would have on his children, is unforgivable. I have had to become a very good actress for the sake of my GDs, letting them believe, Daddy and I are friends.

I christened IT 'sperm donor' because he doesn't deserve the title father. DD has shortened it to 'spermie' which somehow sounds suitably derogatory

phoenix does the bad word begin with 'tw'? I've seen it on Mumsnet

When DD and SIL split up, SIL took off to live several hundred miles away. He absolutely refuses to have anything to do with DD or us and only speaks to his son (who is 8) very infrequently. He has never come back here to see him and it's over a year now.

GS missed his father and couldn't understand why he wouldn't at least phone. DD told him it was because his father was very angry with her but he still loved GS etc.

We are all disgusted with SIL but I see from this thread that it could be worse.

Incidentally, SIL refused to contribute to GS's upkeep in anyway whatsoever.

Sorry to hear your DS does not get to see his children. That is very sad.

Oh, Flower that's awful, I feel for your family.

My ex DiL was a gem also. Told the court that my DS was a class A drug user, alcoholic and mentally unstable. He had to satisfy the court of all of these. He passed with flying colours. She also complained that the children came back from a camping holiday in Wales having not being fed proper food, dirty and that he didn't take them to the sea as promised. They ate the type of food one eats when camping, were grubby because they had enjoyed a rough and tumble camping holiday and it was raining so much they didn't venture to the sea. She tried everything. She also said he attacked her when witnesses at the school playground said the opposite, he was hugging his son on his son's 5th birthday and she tried to drag the child out of his arms, he did push her away but she never fell or was hurt. The police came to his house in full 'riot' gear, black mariah and coshes saying that they were told a 'dangerous Thai Boxer lived there' He does box but is in no way dangerous. I cannot stand the girl, she is out of our lives now but he never sees his children who have been brainwashed. Thank goodness the little one was able to tell the truth about his father and the lies. I hope it all works out for your DD.

Nina That behaviour is not at all unusual. Ex-partners to make all sorts of allegations often when financial issues are being arranged. I hope they get it sorted.

One classy one I heard was a father complaining that the child was not being looked after properly by mum as s/he went for a weekend with Dad with un-ironed clothes! I was not impressed and told him so.

phoenix your right, that's the way I see it too.

What a lowlife, to do,this to his own son is beyond the pale.

I'm relieved, for all of you, that SW realised just what this creep was trying to do.

DD only had to mention to the idiot that she would be speaking to her solicitor. Eventually he realised that DD would take any steps to ensure her DD's well being no matter what.

DD was heartbroken initially as this was not the life she had envisioned for herself and her children but without going into personal details, we supported her 100%.

I sincerely hope you and your family can move on from this upset and life calms down for you all in the future. It does happen.

Actually, there is a word that comes to mind that was used on Bad Mothers Club from time to time, it was a combination of two bad words, and just occasionally I come across a person that it might have been made for!

What he (ex idiot) has done is unforgivable, and practically child abuse in it's own way! (I do hope that this comes out as it was meant?)

Nina

My DD is on the final stages of a divorce and it has not been plain sailing but thank goodness the contact between both parents and DGD has been amicable for DGD sake. Mind you when she is not around I think there has been a moment or two.

What a manipulative --. I can only imagine the inner rage you must be experiencing but you have to be the better person, difficult though.

I hope you, your DD and her family come through this OK. There are a lot of us who can understand the worry you are going through, life just turns on a sixpence sometimes and we can only be there to keep picking up the pieces.

Hope you can all move on from this. What a nasty man he is, using vulnerable little children like this.

Thank goodness they have a sensible SW.

Thanks everyone for your support and good wishes for our family

Nina what an absolute s--t of a man,I'm so glad the little ones have told you all what happened and that he has not frightened them into keeping secrets he doesn't deserve to see them at all,I hope the Police give him a really good talking to and frighten the life out of him.((hugs)) for you all you deserve them.

ninathenena, what a horror, and I' m so relieved that the sw has said he's only allowed supervised access in future, and named this as emotional abuse. There is a real shortage of suitable venues, and supervisors for children, and their families in this kind of situation. I do hope some effective intervention with the father takes place. Feel for you, your grandson and his mum.

Mishap not yet ! They have known each other since they were 11. He has always wanted to be more than friends. IT is convinced they already are.
Friend has been working in Scotland for past 3wks and has never been alone with boys.

Yes friend is at DD waiting for police to arrive. SW has been and he is only allowed supervised access in future, due to emotional abuse.

Oh, nina, what a complete s**t. Glad you have involved police etc. We threatened the Idiot with that and he stopped pretty quickly so hopefully a solicitor's letter or a visit from the police will do the trick.

Have you found that during this period you are able to say all sorts of words that would never have passed your lips before - I am!

DGS has told DD female friend that 'daddy said he would give me chocolate if I said what he wanted me to'

I hope she is prepared to make a statement to the police.

nina What a ba****d! I hope it gets sorted properly

Gosh - he's really going for it. Is the "friend" a new partner for your DD?