My mother......

What a difficult situation for you.In the end though, it is your Mother's wish to do this, and she can't and shouldn't be forced to do otherwise.Other than the explanation you have already given her, there is little you can do if she won't heed that advice.I think if I were you, I would give it one last try though.

You really don't need this GA

I'd personally leave it for a week or so. As she doesn't have another appointment until the 17th, so long as she doesn't cancel, then she has time to reconsider. This just might be a gut reaction to the gastroscopy, which is admittedly a horrible procedure.

Perhaps give her some space?

How very difficult for you. It sounds as though you have done all you can to put the facts in front of her, and there is not a lot more you can do. The GP will get a message about what has happened and he/she may decide to talk with your Mum about it.

Please do not feel pressured by your siblings. It may be that your Mum will come round to the idea when the dust has settled a bit - but in the end it is her life and she has to make the choice.

After surgery and hospitalisation, the last thing that people want is to be back there being prodded and poked - maybe she just needs a breathing space.

Perhaps she just thinks it's the only thing she has control over.

Sometimes people think enough is enough. I'm afraid it's her choice and there is very little you can do. I know it's hard but you need to respect her wishes otherwise your last years together could be spoiled by friction as you encourage her to have treatment and she refuses.

This is so hard for you- but you will have to respect her wishes and be as supportive and loving as you can. (been there... I know- the pain, but also the feelings later that you did your best to support her the way SHE wanted) hugs and courage

Very hard for you ga, but I agree with granjura.
It sounds as if she's made her decision and will need you to respect that and support her wishes.

((Hugs)) x

I agree with gj too! If your siblings want to try to change her mind that is up to them. And, you have enough else to cope with. Just be the daughter you want to be.

grannyactvisit I'm sorry you are both in this situation. Its hard for her and hard for you to watch. Even if you did persuade her if the medics felt she wasn't in full agreement and giving her unconditional assent they wouldn't go ahead wit the procedure anyway.
MIL did much the same thing about 20 years ago re an endoscopy (she's 101) now and she has had regular discomfort and digestive upsets but the GP gives her medication which sometimes she takes and sometimes she doesn't and nothing we say has any impact on her. My darling dad consented to his gastroscopy and was found to have an large tumour on the oesophagus ; he had hidden his symptoms for some time. He said to me ' no operations Dumpling' and I said 'Yes Dad whatever you want' - broke my heart but I just did all I could to get him comfortable and luckily he died a peaceful death in a hospice.

Hopefully your Mum she can be made comfortable without any further surgical intervention and maybe after a little break she may come round of her own accord juts give her some space.

This must be so hard for you grannyactivist. It is so very difficult to separate our feelings into 'what we want' and 'what we want for our loved one'. Thankfully many of us aren't presented with this awful scenario - decisions are so often out of our hands by nature simply taking its course.
I hope there is a good resolution to this - perhaps, as others have said, she will have a change of heart if she's given some space, and some time to think things through.
Hugs for you, and wishing you peace and strength to deal with whatever the outcome is