Abandoned

When the distance between relatives is large, even within the UK, one day visits cannot be done. I don't think I have ever seen my parents more than two or three times a year since I was twenty-one. We didn't visit my grandparents more than a few times a year either.

Of course trendygran and others are not pathetic but people like me and my parents are not selfish and thoughtless and uncaring about our parents either, which is what the article and some posts seem to be implying.

Currently, I see my eldest daughter and her family about three times a year and that looks set to continue. I do not blame her, or her partner, one jot.

Why are you so desperate rosesarered to defend the Daily Mail against what I will admit was a small, very small joke at their expense. So desperate, the three of you that you do not care how you then make a real person feel.

Feel that sometimes these things need airing. You certainly are not pathetic trendygran and you know you are alone with others having the same problem. It applies to sons and daughters, the hurt must be the same. It is worse when you haven't got a partner, it is a well known fact that being without family contact for long periods can cause depression. So it seems that these selfish children feel their parents are very low down in their list of priorities, it is different if they live abroad, but if they are in the uk they could surely make one day every couple of months to visit the folks that bought them up, but the fact is they don't and won't. Refuse to get involved with the sarcastic and negative postings, it is so,petty.

I wouldn't say it was 'fun' ( not at all) with or without a wink.

You are right. I need my eyes testing and it is so important isn't it? As I said I made fun of the Daily Mail; please tell me why three of you feel that makes it ok to attack me personally?

Of course not Gracesgran but it does help if you give us a clue. And, I haven't seen a wink anywhere either!

What wink? Where?

Are you really directing which expression I should use when joking KItty. I used a wink at the end of the last post, are you going to correct me on that one too. All these comments on my use of emoticons and even a comparison to Doc Martin just because I made fun of the Daily Mail!

As one of the comments after the article says: "and the professional men...?"

All of the people being specifically criticised are women. Why?

When long distances are involved it is difficult, not only time-wise but financially too.

Hello, my first post, here is the link,
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3267207/Abandoned-Meet-professional-women-claim-busy-visit-elderly-parents-don-t-feel-bad-ve-just-hip-operation.html

Sort of the Doc Martin of GN

The usual clue to when someone is joking Gracesgran is not !

Now what have you said about of having a sense of humour roses and what was it? ... oh yes being too earnest.

Unpleasant comment, Gracesgran, however much you dislike the Mail.
trendygran, what a shame, living only a few miles from you, and you hardly see them.
Luckylegs9, it's good that newspapers sometimes highlight things that may strike a chord with the public, there are too many lonely older people.

Not likely Gracesgran!

We see ours regularly and they often meet up when DD2 is staying here. We have always had lots of family get togethers since we and DH's brothers all had children around the same time.

These have continued as things (and people) have moved on and most of our siblings, their children and grandchildren and our children and grandchildren are happy to come - though there is always someone missing. We host the 'bashes' so we know there will be one every year and I know my DDs will continue the tradition when we can't.

Having said that DSil rarely sees her DD and I tell her things that I have learned on FB!

I have had a look for a link and cannot find this article on line. Perhaps the DM feels that it is mainly their readers "abandoning" their parents

ps and don't read the DM!!!

Same here. DS and family are only 10 minutes away by car but now both children are at secondary school we rarely see them. To be fair, both DS and DDiL do phone every now and again, so at least we know they are ok, and I call them every two weeks. Our DD and family are over 2 hours away by car so we don't see them that much either but she also texts or calls fairly regularly. You have to think back to when you were that age with probably a full time job, the family to look after, cleaning, shopping and cooking. It's a very busy time of life.

trendygran - you don't sound pathetic at all, just a bit sad, but perhaps when you realise there are others of us in the same boat, you will feel a bit better!

We see our granddaughter less frequently these days, which is natural as she is now 15 and has lots of activities going on and wants to be with her friends. They only live 15 minutes away by car so see them reasonably regularly although not as often as we would like, but at least we see them. We are fortunate that DGD sometimes says to my DD 'we haven't seen nan and granddad for a while, can we see them please?' Bless her. I thought the women in the article were very selfish as I said. Maybe they weren't close to their parents, or didn't feel the parents were good parents. My own father was a violent, abusive, self-centred alcoholic but at the end of his life me and my siblings made sure he was OK.

I can't see them at weekends as that is their Family time. How sad that 'family time' so often does not include grandparents these days. Are they not family then? I think you're a saint trendy to 'understand the need for that'.
We are lucky in that we see our children and grandchildren regularly; they all live within 2 miles of us and even though my DS and his partner have recently split up, DS has the boys to stay 3 nights a week, and he often just pops in for a cuppa with one or both of them. Our DD is single and consequently spends a lot of time with us. Lovely for us, but I wish she wasn't on her own as I would willingly sacrifice much of the time I have with her and the baby for her to find some happiness in a relationship.

I read the article and thought the same as KatyK.

We are lucky enough to have a very close family that get together frequently but we have friends whose children and grandchildren are always sooooo busy and although they put on a brave face, the hurt is very clear.

to all who might be feeling left out.

Sadly the Daily Mail article rings true. (NOT my favourite paper at all normally I have to say).
I have 2 grandchildren who live about 4 miles away from me and 2 more who live almost 300 miles away . I still rarely see the local ones because they are too busy with work ,school, swimming lessons etc .to include me . I've just asked my daughter if I can meet them near where they live next Friday ,when she isn't at work. The answer was 'I haven't got that far! '. I can't see them at weekends as that is their Family time (yes, I do understand the need for that) or on her other
day off because that is shopping and Playgroup day.
I live alone and do have as active a social life as possible, but time with family means the world to me. --or would do.
I haven't seen my other granddaughters since August 2014 because of distance, shift work there, etc . They haven't been back here (parents hometown) to visit since December 2013.
This all sounds pathetic , I know, but it IS hard,

Didn't read the mail but it is so true . It's the reason Silver Line was started, many are very lonely

Yes I read this. I was appalled. What selfish, uncaring young women. Oh to be a fly on the wall when their children grow up.

Sorry if it upset you Lucky Girl. It certainly seems the D M is not for you. I will try to post happy things in future. I have not got the link Indinana, it was in my paper yesterday, feel sure if you put in Daily Mail and the subject in your search bar it will come up.