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My parents-in-law were great people and so are my sons-in-law and my daughter-in-law. Lets hear it for the silent majority.

(84 Posts)
Elegran Tue 28-Nov-17 11:32:13

I have noticed before that bad relationships get far more publicity than good ones. Not surprising, really. If we get on well with our parents, our children and our inlaws, and don't have rows or get exasperated by them, we just accept that as normal and don't go on about it. If there is friction, there are dramatic stories to tell and hurt feelings to be discussed.

The result of this is an imbalance in what is read in the media about loving versus toxic inlaws, and that fuels the current obsession with blaming ALL the ills of society on older people.

How about everyone with GOOD inlaws posting as well as those with BAD ones?

Barmeyoldbat Mon 26-Mar-18 16:00:18

My ex mil is the most wonderful person ever. When I was divorcing her son her son I went to stay with her for the summer holidays and we have always kept in touch and been invited, along with my second husband, to all the family events. She is like a mum to me

SpanielNanny Sun 25-Mar-18 15:36:15

This is such a lovely thread to see. I couldn’t wish for a better dil. She is a fantastic mother to my dgs, and a wonderful partner to my ds. She keeps me up to date with all the goings on with my dgs, and thanks to her I see him every week. I’m very happy to have her as a part of my family, and I like to think she feels the same.

stella1949 Sun 25-Mar-18 13:59:07

I had lovely in-laws , long gone now. My son in law is wonderful too . I never thought my daughter would find a nice man , and I was just trying to console myself about it, when she came home one day from university in tears. She'd had a really horrible day , so I did what any mother would do , I advised her to go and have a few drinks with her girl friends. She went to a pub, and sat down to watch a rugby game on the television. A man sat down next to her and asked if she knew the difference between a ruck and a maul..... sixteen years later they've been married for ten years and have two lovely children. I've always been thankful that he didn't know about rucks and mauls ( and that she did !) .

henetha Sun 25-Mar-18 13:44:14

I too have had lovely in-laws over the years and are genuinely fond of some of them. It's all about give and take, and tolerance.
And it's great to have a positive thread.

felice Sun 25-Mar-18 13:41:14

My second husbands parents were wonderful, when DS2 was born my mother came up to look after DS1, a nightmare, she resented DS2 still does, and made my life hell.
I was adopted at 5 months so she never had a new baby. Constantly complained about me not dusting etc, and became hysterical when i was breastfeeding, called it disgusting and NOT normal.
Asked her to leave after 3 weeks and MIL and FIL came up, X2 worked funny hours and DS1 has some problems.
It was wonderful, they made me a cup of tea.
They were the loveliest people ever and saved my sanity.

Elegran Sun 25-Mar-18 13:03:32

Bump

2retirementrookies Wed 10-Jan-18 15:49:06

I completely agree. I have a wonderful family and am SO grateful for my lovely in-laws. There is such a stigma when you marry into a family that they are going to be difficult. But that was, thankfully, not the case for me. I am so grateful to have such a wonderfully supportive family who love me as I do them. So wonderful. Family is everything.

grannyactivist Mon 25-Dec-17 23:55:36

So glad this post has popped up again today - I just want to sing the praises of my wonderful daughter in law who has hosted Christmas for her family and mine and done it all with a welcome and a smile (ably supported by my eldest son, I should add). She and my son invited their younger brothers to stay over the whole Christmas period. (Both brothers were classmates at school and good friends, but their paths diverged when my son went to work abroad.) Yesterday they also hosted her parents and aunt and uncle for meals and they stayed overnight and had a cooked breakfast this morning - then her family left and we all arrived and had a wonderful Christmas meal with all the trimmings. My daughter in law is very special and I love her to pieces. tchsmile

Nelliemoser Mon 25-Dec-17 22:44:58

Got it right at last.

Nelliemoser Mon 25-Dec-17 22:44:30

Another B**** post I have managed to erase.

My family was very small and OH had big families on both sides. 5 and 6 children in the two families.
MIL and my sister in law were/are lovely. The rest of this big family was so welcoming when I joined the family. I never felt out of place at all.
Very few aunties/uncles left now though.

Blencathra Mon 25-Dec-17 19:53:55

It is a lovely thread. I had lovely parents- in -law and couldn't have nicer daughters-in-law.

Norah Mon 25-Dec-17 19:42:16

Elegran, Lovely thread, my sils are all kind pleasant men.

Starlady Sun 03-Dec-17 00:36:20

No complaints here. I'm very lucky, I know, and I hope they think they're lucky to have me, as well.

Curlycut Thu 30-Nov-17 18:52:10

Elegran this thread is like a breath of fresh air what a good idea, I don’t come on here much but have to say we only seem to be the minority because we don’t go on about the family we have seems a bit self indulgent. I have to say I have an amazing daughter and son in law, a wonderful son and daughter in law and I love them all equally, and my mil long gone now was a complete lady and my inspiration thanks so much for this happy thread

nookie Thu 30-Nov-17 01:29:29

For varying reasons I have never had a MIL/FIL even though I am on my second marriage. However I do have two wonderful DIL's. My son's have been blessed, and so have I. However I am never complacent, I realise that relationships require nurturing, even those of long standing.

DotMH1901 Wed 29-Nov-17 23:24:25

My Mum in law was lovely, I didn't really get to know my father in law as he died a year after I got married.

lesley4357 Wed 29-Nov-17 18:14:37

We have one SiL and get on very well. He has much in common with my OH- music, films - and we are lucky enough to have a really good relationship with his parents. We have all spent Christmas together for the past 10 years and have a great time.

M0nica Wed 29-Nov-17 17:57:52

Another one coming to sing of marvellous family relationships. I had a wonderful relationship with my in-laws. I sometimes found it easier to talk things through with my MiL than with my DM. My parents equally took DH to their hearts and he got on so well with them.

My DiL is wonderful, I cannot believe that such a nice woman should want to marry my DS, much as I love him. They are excellent parents. In fact in our case DDil's family and ours have become one and act and talk as one. When DDiL's mother celebrated her 80th birthday, DH, DD and I all went up for the celebration and she said, she was so glad we had made the journey (of 200 miles) because it was so nice to have all the family together.

quizqueen Wed 29-Nov-17 17:47:02

I got on well with my MiL and we still kept in touch after my divorce, carrying on buying birthday and Christmas presents for each other up to her death. I also get on well with both my SiLs. I took my one SiL to see Rick Wakeman for his birthday present. That was a nice 'date night'.

Saggi Wed 29-Nov-17 14:42:15

My SIL is the best thing that happened to our family in a long time... and of course the grandchildren that followed. We have ‘got on’ from day one! He’s also the best father any two kids could have...they absolutely adore him . But my daughter and he are now ‘separated’ ...while living in same house as finances are dictating! But they’ve managed to keep a balanced environment for the kids. I will always regard him as a second son ...as I promised his dying mother on the day of their wedding. He said whatever happens in the future between him and my daughter he will always regard me as a second mum and I believe him. I regard him highly . I hope others can say the same in there bad times.

HillyN Wed 29-Nov-17 14:37:13

I always got on well with my PIL, sometimes better than with my own parents! When I had DD1 my Mum felt able to openly criticise me over issues like disposable nappies and dummies, whereas my MIL respected my views. Also my MIL lived closer and offered to clean for me (we paid her) when I went back to work, even doing my ironing unasked. As for my 2 SILs, well they are both lovely and as long as they make my DDs happy that's all I ask.

Overthehills Wed 29-Nov-17 14:15:05

Thankyou Elegran for starting this thread. My parents-in-law were the best and my daughter-in-law ditto. I’m so, so grateful for them. My ex-sil was/is a nightmare but am hoping for better things from DD’s new partner!

luluaugust Wed 29-Nov-17 14:13:33

3 DC and 3 in law children are lovely.

GrannyJan9 Wed 29-Nov-17 13:29:29

I agree, it is great to hear about the good guys in a family: all my children have fabulous partners, wives etc and we get on very well . One DinL and I go on Spa days together and another "rescued" my son (not her hubbie) when he was mentally ill. Even got on well with my Hubbies parents......sadly passed away now....and my sis and family is brilliant too! Always feel so sad when I read of others who have problems!

dirgni Wed 29-Nov-17 13:22:16

We lived next door to my in laws and my husbands aunt ( his mothers sister) We all had a fantastic life with the extended family. I couldn't have had more support and help from three wonderful people.