Friendships going wrong

It sounds like she has been busy and is still early into retirement whilst you have had some time to adjust. Perhaps you can remain friends but on a different level?

I think you have to accept that times change and friends may move out of lives in just the same way that friends move into them I have lost friends over the years by simply growing apart losing some common ground or having different levels of happiness/sadness It’s sad when it’s a long term relationship but I think it’s about acceptance Meetng up yesterday made you realise the closeness had gone on her side Look for some new friends to build a friendship with she may come back when her new life levels out then it’s up to you whether you want to continue or not

You say she’s been very busy with new grandchild and helping son renovate his house. So, she just retired and trying to adjust and help out. Don’t be so hard on her, and yourself. You might have caught her in the middle of changing a nappy or up a ladder.

Invite her round for coffee and cake or meet out, and to show you pictures of her new grandchild. Then take it from there

I can understand your sadness Fellowfeelings. I think some friendships can, sadly, go passed their "sell by date". At different times in life, we have friends that are right for that time and, sometimes, they don't suit the next stages in life and we drift apart. When I look back to the friends that I had when my children were younger, I see that only a very few have travelled with me to the later stages in life. This isn't because we've fallen out, or had disagreements, but because life has taken us on different paths. It sounds as though this could be what's happened with you and your friend. Do you have other friends that you could spend time with or become closer to?

Wise words Eglantine21 . I'm going through it now. It is sad but no point on dwelling on it - times change - people change.

really DONT have much in common

I'm afraid it happens. Sometimes they just get locked into other things like GC and family stuff and it's a phase you can ride out. But sometimes it's a permanent shift, especially with GCs.
Their focus is now on their family not their friends and it's not going to change, not for the next twenty years anyway! You find that even when you meet up their mind and conversation is still with their family.
I found it best to accept that we really have much in common anymore.