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Reluctant dancer

(55 Posts)
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janeainsworth Sun 14-Jan-18 21:58:25

A good teacher might help, gordonbennett.
Would your partner go to classes? The more you learn, the easier it gets, but you have to know what you’re doing IYSWIM.

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Gordonbennett Sun 14-Jan-18 21:50:31

I’ve told him how I feel/how he makes me feel, he can’t see it. Evidently I’m the one who is too serious about it. I’m conscious that I’m not very good, so on the few occasions we have been ‘social’ dancing I’ve told him not to do anything ‘fancy’ just basic stuff. He then does all these steps that that I’ve not done etc and I completely lose my confidence (what little I have) and we have an argument. He says I worry about what people think, he’s right, I feel foolish and I’m sure he makes me look it too!

I don’t think I have a problem with dancing, I just think I have a problem dancing with him!

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BBbevan Sun 14-Jan-18 20:46:15

Well just don't go and tell him why. You have a duty to yourself and your happiness. Life is too short to be miserable.

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MissAdventure Sun 14-Jan-18 20:13:35

I'm not sure I would want to go at all if your partner can't relax about it. Have you told him how it makes you feel?

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Gordonbennett Sun 14-Jan-18 19:12:37

My partner loves ballroom dancing, he’s retired (we don’t live together) I still work full time. We have been dancing on and off (me off) for around 5 years. I go once a week, he goes another two times on his own. I am far too tired to go any more in the week.

I love music and dancing (not good at ballroom) but he makes it a chore as he is so obsessive/serious about it. He criticises me, never any praise. I dread going because of this and we’ve had many an argument about it.

I know many women would kill to have their man go dancing, so I feel I’m missing something here. Am I wrong to feel this way? He makes an enjoyable pastime deeply unenjoyable.

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