Gransnet forums

Relationships

How do I break this cycle?

(53 Posts)
stella1949 Mon 07-May-18 07:30:25

You ask how to break this cycle. The answer is to break the cycle - stop calling him, block his calls , block him on social media. Stop clinging to the past when things were good - they are never going to be good again with this cheat and liar.

Life is too short to cling to losers like this man . He doesn't appear to have one redeeming feature. The fact that you "get on really well" when together shouldn't blind you to the fact that he lies and cheats whenever it suits him. You're worth more than this. Good luck .

Gerispringer Mon 07-May-18 06:40:55

Well he’s a cheat and a liar and can’t be trusted. There’s three reasons for avoiding this man. You’re worth more than this surely? Can you talk about this with a close friend or your adult children? I’m sure they’d tell you to give him the boot once and for all. He’s not making you happy. Just delete his contact details, block his emails and take it from there. Make today the first day of the rest of your life, do something good for yourself, don’t waste anymore time on this relationship. Sorry if that’s not what you want to hear.

Deni1963 Mon 07-May-18 06:01:05

Some of you might remember me from the beginning of the year. I read every day and debate if to post.
Brief synopsis: I found out Jan 2nd DH had bee having an affair for 2 months and she was pregnant ( I'm 54 and have had 4 losses and two children with ex). Two weeks later a 2nd woman messages me climing to be his gf of 3 months. He moved out. First woman had an abortion but they still talk claiming it's work, and I know he's probably seeing the 2nd.
He's an alcoholic and had been sober 8 years until November last year. He now drinks again.
At his persistent we began talking end of February. In April I agreed to see him - like dating - twice a week providing he was not with anyone else.
Well..... he lives at home. His parents severed all contact with me despite the fact we were very close. DH texts sporadically, ignores my calls and still lies, disappears for nights, claiming he's sleeping or not well. He's cancelled 2 weekend dates claiming illnesses and then off radar.
I'm miserable - I know the situation must end, but how do I sever contact? I find it impossible as just worn down.
When we are together it's as if we've never been apart. And we actually get on really well.
I just don't know how to break this cycle. Or begin a life without him.