Unexpected and scary

I agree with Icanhand them back. Talk to him about his and your expectations and go from there. Saves any embarrassing misunderstandings.
If couples can’t talk how can they contemplate more intimate things ?

Diana54 I think I would prefer to invite him to dinner at your home and see how things progress. A weekend away sounds lovely but I should wait a while for that if I were you.

Dear Diana, just do it! Tomorrow if tonight is too late.

I hope you have all the enjoyment with your lover that I have had with mine.

And it was me that bundled him into bed, tout de suite

Go for it! If dancing caused a flutter throw caution to the wind and have some fun. If you both feel sparks the duvet dancing will come easy

What happened to getting to know someone so well that it just happens when the time comes with no preamble. It seems bizarre to me to be planning what to do if it goes tits up and talk of people checking to see you're ok, blimey if that's the case step back, take a breath and don't do it. I guess if you need to ask, you're not ready, so wait until you are, things should progress at their own pace and happen naturally.

I don’t think you should do anything with any body if you can’t talk to them first. It shouldn’t be too difficult to ask him general questions and then lead the conversation round to what he was thinking was the way to go.

I'd go for the hotel for all the reasons others have said. Also, I think one or other of you might not be comfortable doing it in the bed you shared with your husband.
Good luck whatever you decide

I would opt for the hotel too in the unlikely event it happened to me?
Whatever you decide good luck and much happiness for the future ?

Well I'd prefer the hotel, single rooms , for yourself and see what transpires. Then at least you can retreat /leave if you are not happy. Difficult to get him to leave your house if you want to! Also if it goes wrong he can't accuse you of leading him on and then rejecting him.
Actually it is hard to advise as only you know this man and what he's like. But I would always err on the side of caution till I knew someone really well.

Either way - and I think I would do the supper option at home - I would make very sure someone you trust knows what you are doing and where. Have an arrangement with them that they are to contact the authorities after a certain time if they haven't heard from you - say after you reckon he will have left - to say you are ok. If you decide he is going to stay and he has your interests at heart he won't mind you ringing friend to say you are ok and having a great time.

Diana54 whatever you decide ....enjoy! If it was me I'd go for home turf and also admit my apprehension....bet he's apprehensive too, so a chat will help both of you!

I would prefer to go away to a hotel, only allow him to sleep at your own house when you are sure of things in your mind.
I think a weekend away will make things more special for both of you.

You seem to have answered your own question.... ask him for dinner at your place, see how the evening progresses, and THEN afterwards see if you are suitable together to go away for a weekend.

And keep in mind that he will be as nervous as you are.

Go for it.

nobody wants a defiant STD

He is probably feeling the same explain how you feel if he cares for you he will understand good luck hope it all works out .

lots of men over a certain age have their own worries or problems with their wedding tackle
MagicWriter2016; Thanks for that prognosis!
What "certain age" would that be" ?
I'll have to check my "use-by date" and be on the alert, but I don't take much notice of those on my foodstuffs
If it looks and smells alright it's OK by me!
Hasn't let me down so far.
Good Health and take care!
OoRoo

Been married almost 52 years to the same man so I'm probably the wrong person to ask.

Common sense however would dictate you be honest and up front....tell him (in your own words) that it's been a long time since you've been with someone you genuinely care for and that you're afraid you'll jeopardize that with an unforeseen bout of 'stage fright'. If he really cares for you he'll say and do what makes you comfortable.

As it's your birthday month Rufus, hope you are being "careful" ???

GrannyGravy13: Of course;! I always am. I always look Right, then Left, then Right again, before crossing the road.! (We drive on the left too!)
But why single me out?
I assumed your warning was also addressed to over 90s Grannies too! There must be some?.
It's well past my beauty sleep time, so might catch you;
Blimey! I was going to say "tomorrow", but it's already that here.
OoRoo see you "later."

I'm wishing you all the luck in the world with your new relationship.
Personally I would invite for supper,buy yourself a "Dine in for Two" with an extra bottle of wine and go from there.
Enjoy.

Silverlining, you are so right, lots of men over a certain age have their own worries or problems with their 'wedding tackle'! He's maybe having the same conversation with some of his pals. Don't forget, it's easier for a woman to 'fake' things than it is for a man!

Oopsadaisy, why did you hope she didn't say yes to meeting him online? I met my hubby online about 13 years ago. It's no different really to meeting a stranger in a pub for instance. If someone is a liar and a cheat, they can do that just as easily to your face as online. You just have to be careful and follow the same rules as you would wherever you met them. Never take a first date back to your home. Always make sure someone knows where you are and who with, and if you don't feel comfortable, a quick trip to the loos to phone someone to come and rescue you.

Good luck OP with whatever you choose to do. Life is too short to be alone and unhappy.

As it's your birthday month Rufus, hope you are being "careful" ???

Nothing wrong with meeting someone online Oopsadaisy, 9 years and 1 son later that’s where my daughter and son in law met!!

How lovely for you, a romantic w'end away, you both obviously fancy each other- go for it.