DD and family moving 5hours away, could be worse!

Don't want to sound like a cry baby! but I'm afraid that's how I feel, so I apologise in advance. Firstly I come from a family of nomads, my own parents left Ireland and all their respective families when I was a year old, with two older brothers. That meant I never knew what it was like to have cousins and aunties and uncles around, my own dad had a sister and a brother, the sister moved to America and we didn't know much about her, never spoke or wrote my whole life. My mother was close to her family, there were seven of them the only living relative is her sister in Ireland, and I speak with auntie on the phone and keep in touch, though I've never had a chance to go to Belfast this past 16 years. So I also moved away from my parents when I was 45 and the children were 11 and 7. We ended up in Cornwall due to a project into renewable energy that he'd got involved with. I didn't really want to leave, but this was something he had to see through, so we upped and left. Six hours via car, so it's wasn't round the corner. I have to say it wasn't easy, there were a lot of family conflict on my husbands side, and I'm afraid I didn't deal with the upset well, and I'll live to regret that for as long as I live. The time spent here has been chaotic, due to husband's breakdown in our second year here. Things went from bad to worse, and to cut a long story short our children didn't have a great time here from the ages of 13 and 9. I tried to keep the family together and in the end, after 11 years calm was restored, but with a consequence of my husband's becoming brain damaged due to lack of oxygen. He still get's about, so don't be too alarmed, but at 59 he is very slow with co morbid difficulties. Five years ago, as we were seeing the light again our first grandchild was born, then three years our second. I always had to work full time, due to husband's illness at a place walking distance to our home, so I could do the caring also, We gave up the car, as I hated driving and he could drive no more, plus money in keeping it running was an issue. I often lent money or paid for stuff as my daughter and other half struggled, quite a sum over the years, plus there were always crisis to deal with in having to move for some daft decision or another. I felt strangely needed by all this chaos, does that make sense? Even though I was put upon. Now my daughter and family are moving 5 hours drive away, there are no swaps in the social housing sector nearer home, and trust me it's the truth. They wanted a garden and this house swap came up. I can understand totally why they want this house, they would not get a place here in Cornwall, unless it was another flat with loads of stairs in not so great areas. I'm really caving in here, like I don't know whether I'm coming or going, had chest infection after chest infection and husband still needs caring for, though to be fair he's really been a brick and done whatever he can to help. Two people close to me here died, and one very dear friend moved back to her hometown due to family commitment, and with my husband having suffered with what in effect is a stroke, and with him having been diagnosed as Bipolar before the brain damage, our lives weren't the best place to make friends and influence people, and I shut myself off apart from these few folk who I could let my family be who they were. My fault always worried what others think!!! With my daughter going there is an added annoyance. I had some money that my daughter had in an account for me, four thousand, she was to pay it back and had had a windfall of £11,000 herself due to a relatives legacy. She spent my money, and the £11,000 and didn't tell me that my savings had been spent in effect twice, once before they got the inheritance and then again as they spent this new money. I'm so upset that they have done this, so not only are they moving but our relationship is not what it was. We always had a laugh, she was always a challenge, but I've always loved her, still do. She'd be forever messaging me with her annoyances in life. I have forgiven them on one hand, but her other half is leaving a well paid job here to go onto agency books, no doubt that he will work hard, he always has. So you see I'm sad that they are moving, especially not to see the boys, the live 40 miles away at the moment, but we could go on the train for a day visit once a month or every three weeks. They had stopped coming as often to see us, which was understandable working six days a week with two small boys is so very difficult. So I never got upset so long as we could go up on the train. I know I have to let go, but I'm so hurt It's making me ill. We do have a son, who still lives at home, he and his girlfriend just can't get a home together either, he's now 23, but it's not right that they should be here with us, they need their own place. If I won the lottery I'd buy them homes, even my daughter, she has hurt me in the past, little things though, that I've let go, she is a force to be reckoned with. There, I've vented, and I'm sorry if I'm sitting on a pity pot, but that's how I feel at the moment. Our home is very big, big gardens, and it takes a lot of upkeep, but I have found that painting outside and gardening whilst school is out and I'm not at work, has been very helpful. (I'm a school cleaner for three hours during the day, I get my small NHS pension, we don't have a lot coming in, but we own the house, I'm in two minds to sell up, but our Son's job and GF are here. I do have a good neighbour next door, but all their family are in the area, so I don't encroach. All there is here is my husband son and his girlfriend, so I'm also feeling lonely to top it off. God I sound so pathetic. Any way, I'll sign off, just my thoughts, sometimes it helps to write it down. I can't go over it, under it, or round it, I just have to get through it. If there are grammar and spelling mistakes, I typed it without thinking.