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My alcoholic ex wants the dog

(61 Posts)
Lynne59 Thu 08-Nov-18 09:15:23

The law
The law in England & Wales is clear. A pet will be treated as an item of personal property such as a piece of furniture, artwork or jewellery. Where disputes arise as to who gets to keep the pet, it can simply come down to whose money was used to purchase the pet and who has financially maintained the pet. This will always seem unfair if the other party has spent more time looking after the pet or is better placed to care for the pet going forward. But there is very little, if any, room for manoeuvre in unless the pet was subsequently given as a gift.

....taken from a legal website. If your ex was in rehab, he wasn't then able to look after the dog. He had a 12-month restraining order, so again, wasn't able to look after the dog. He has shown himself to be incapable of looking after his own welfare - drinking again, straight from rehab (what a waste of time trying to help someone like him) so would not be classed as fit to look after a dog.

Ignore him. I shouldn't think he'll be able to do anything. Would he be able to afford to pay for a solicitor? Or would he be spending his money on alcohol?

Ensure that he stays away from you and your home. Don't leave the dog unattended in the garden.

What a waster he sounds.

Iam64 Thu 08-Nov-18 09:12:21

Come on folks, if it was as simple as Felicity telling him to get lost, she'd never have obtained a restraining order in the first place. this man is obviously a violent, controlling idiot and her telling him to go away isn't going to cut it.
Police/Lawyer -clarify your rights. Take legal action.

Is the dog chipped to him as the owner>

EllanVannin Thu 08-Nov-18 09:08:18

I would go for some free advice from a solicitor.
Make sure you don't inadvertently leave the dog in the garden.

Buffybee Thu 08-Nov-18 08:46:05

Does he still have the receipt to prove that the dog is his?
Which it isn't!!!!!
If not tell him where to go!
Tell the Police that he is threatening to break the restraining order to take your pet away, which he thinks is his but is a family pet.
How can he prove the dog is his??
God I'm so angry! Stupid bastard!
I wish I was near to you, I would help you.

jenpax Thu 08-Nov-18 08:41:25

Sorry to say this but the dog is essentially property as far as the law is concerned so that ownership will depend on who purchased the dog. However this will not give the ex the right to enter your home to take the dog. One this is likely to be a breach of the injunction if that hasn’t expired and two entering another’s property without permission is trespass.
If the ex wishes to gain the animal legally he would need then to go to court,but obviously this would cost money! I presume he is not working and this type of issue would not attract legal aid for him.
I would suggest you approach a solicitor,maybe to obtain a further injunction if the other has run out.
As others have said I would also speak to the RSPCA for their potential support, as if he gained the dog he would be unable to look after it due to his housing situation!

Buffybee Thu 08-Nov-18 08:40:27

I agree with Anniebach, the dog belongs to you and the family.
Stand up to him, tell him the dog is yours and he will be taking it nowhere. Arsehole!!!

Anniebach Thu 08-Nov-18 08:36:02

Felicity, he was part of your family when he bought the dog, living with you? if so the dog was bought as a family pet , a gift !

Iam64 Thu 08-Nov-18 08:27:40

Speak to the Police, you have probably already been in contact with their specialist Domestic Abuse team (or whatever its called in your area). Its likely they will go and speak to your ex partner and warn him if he breaches the order, he'll be back before the Court.
The police team will also be clear on what, if any action can be taken to stop him taking the dog. He's using the dog to abuse you but you already know that. Best of luck.

eazybee Thu 08-Nov-18 08:10:21

I would imagine that the welfare of the dog is paramount, as it is with children, but I have no idea about the legalities of dog possession or ownership. Would you be able to register anything by way of microchip? You need to prevent access to the dog, and more importantly, to your home.

TwiceAsNice Thu 08-Nov-18 08:00:23

Take legal advice ( free half hour solicitor appt?) as he is threatening to put a healthy animal down, although I doubt a vet would do this , maybe contact the RSPCA for advice too. As my ex husband was also hugely abusive you have my sympathy

Felicity53 Thu 08-Nov-18 07:56:42

I have a huge dilemma so forgive me if I ramble a tad.
I had to have my hugely abusive alcoholic partner removed from my house by the police earlier this year. The courts placed a 12 month restraining order on him.
He has just come out of rehab but within 24 hours was drinking again.
His children and I found him a place to live but no dogs are allowed. He bought a lovely Springer spaniel 8 years ago and she is a much adored family pet and this is the only home she has ever known. He is insisting on taking her away just to spite me. He cannot have her himself but says he will rehome her or have her put down. This would just be a new form of abuse but will most definitely push me to breaking point. I don’t know where I stand legaly or what I can do. I know he would defy the restraining order and take her. Any advice gratefully received.