is it me?

You say you have no money. Have you signed up for Universal Credit? They can probably give you vouchers to go to the Food Bank.

Many charities do Christmas lunches for the lonely and deprived. Go online and find out what help is available in your area. A Christmas meal in the presence of other people can help your mood. Alternatively see if you can volunteer for a charity helping the homeless, perhaps seeing people worse off than you, you do at least have a roof over your head. will make you feel better

When life has dropped you in it, and your story is sad, you must find the strength to get yourself going again and that can only come from you.

Is your counsellor BACP registered please?

You most certainly do need some kind of help.

As Brenda from Bristol said …..

the counsellors say i'm too nice.
If you're nice then the neighbours would like to come in for a Christmas drink and to meet you - perhaps the start of some lovely friendships?

Loads of cards in houses, already?
We've had five lemongrove!
But three days ago we had only had one.

seastar says she has spent three days in bed, so these lucky folk must have had loads of cards from people who were very quick off the mark at the end of November.

seastar you could try inviting the neighbours in for a drink - sometimes you have to be the one who begins the process of making friends.

Have schools broken up early for Christmas?

Mawboon I alerted this at 6 am this morning I tried to do it in a careful way in case I was wrong
And yes Monica and Squiffy that’s what makes me so wary now and not sure how to feel about some threads
Hopefully we ll get over this spate and back to normality soon

I am beginning to feel invisible -
I did post a link to the thread!

I'm always suspicious when poster give too much detail.
Speaking from personal experience and others who have experienced abuse you just don't talk about it in detail, except to a therapist
You might say, as I do "it wasn't a barrel of laughs" or it could have been better etc.
But you never give details.

Exactly MOnica! There are two threads that I’ve just read which may well be true, but I have my doubts..... I don’t like being so untrusting and cynical

What makes me fed-up with doubtful threads, is that I am now approaching every new thread with a story of personal tragedy with suspicion, which is unjust and unfair on those genuine posters who need help and support.

My thoughts too Squiffy and lemongrove

Hmm, my first thoughts too lemon

HQ alerted.

Well like a lot of posters on here they drip feed information.

So whether you have a son or a daughter or both you're hardly all alone in the world as previously claimed.

FlexibleFriend The poster original started a thread a few months ago where she said she only had a wonderful supportive DAUGHTER in her life now she has a son at university and no daughter
At the moment this is not adding up

I think you are right lemongrove.

www.google.com/url?q=https://www.gransnet.com/forums/relationships/1253592-Sister-sending-nasty-letters

This thread

You have to live in the now, you can't change the past.
You're family sounds horrendous so I'd cut them out of my life.
I'm sorry for the loss of your husband, that must have been a shock.
I think you need to start with seeing your Doctor as you sound very depressed, he can prescribe anti depressants and refer you for counselling.
There is nothing wrong with living alone, it's certainly better than living with nasty people and your son won't be at university forever.
Samaritans do a great job, they do listen but they won't tell you how to solve your problems, that's not their job.
You need to stop worrying about what you've done and think about what you can do to change your life. Think about making new friends, join local clubs have a look for "meet up" groups in your area.
If you can't find a way to get to your Dad's funeral then don't go. You won't miss him any less but there's no point in making yourself ill worrying about it either.
As for other people's lives they are an illusion, so what if they have cards they might still be a battered wife etc.
Just stop comparing your life to other people's lives, no one has a perfect life absolutely no one.

She says she has 1 son there is no mention of a daughter.
I've read it several times now and still see no daughter.

Thinking of you Seastar......as someone said, try to be positive. ?

What is your lovely daughter doing about the funeral? Surely she and her brother will try to be at their grandfather's funeral? Can't she help to get you there. Have her aunts fallen out with her too?
I wouldn't put much faith in the counsellor either.
Even at 60, with a degree and life experience, finding a job shouldn't be impossible.
It's almost as if your post is an amalgam of so many others found on GN, isn't it ????

the counsellors say i'm too nice.

You need to look for a more supportive and constructive counsellor. This one is clearly not giving you the help and advice you need.

A onesie will keep you toasty warm.

Loads of cards in houses, already?
Do you have a daughter or a son?