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Travelling solo

(25 Posts)
Happilyretired123 Sat 13-Apr-19 20:25:52

I have a landmark birthday next year and am keen to take a three week rail trip in Canada or USA. DH not keen as
-doesn’t like idea of travelling to USA or Canada
-doesn’t want to leave our dog at all (lol!)
-had a heart attack a few years ago while we were on holiday in Eastern Europe so is anxious about long flight.
Although I haven’t travelled alone since I was in my twenties I am keen to go solo. He says he doesn’t mind but I sense he doesn’t want to be left alone with doggy.
However I am conscious that time soon goes by and would like to travel while I can.
Have any of you left DH behind for a trip?
Any advice?

Happychops Sat 13-Apr-19 20:39:21

Have you any family that could pop in to check on him while your away,or would he manage fine on his own. If he can manage and doesn’t mind you going.I would go for it as we don’t get any younger. If he’s concerned about you travelling solo, perhaps you could go with a company that does accompanied trips to save him worrying. I’ve not travelled that far without my DH but I do occasionally travel several hundred miles to stay with friends and relatives without him. He does admit he is a bit lost while I’m away. But he’s not keen on visiting, and I get more out of seeing people if I’m not worrying about how he’s feeling and if I’m spending too much time chatting. I would talk with him and decide which would be the best way for you to achieve this. Enjoy 😊

Happilyretired123 Tue 16-Apr-19 19:17:45

Thank you-our adult son lives with us so he will have some company 😊

Buffybee Tue 16-Apr-19 20:33:25

If I was you I'd go for it Happily!
You go and have your fabulous adventure and oh can stay at home, as he wishes, as you say he has your Son for company.
Bon Voyage! 😊

mosaicwarts Tue 16-Apr-19 20:42:27

I am sorry your husband isn't keen, and you can't share this experience. My last holiday with my husband was to India, sadly he died six weeks later - I was so glad we experienced it together. My daughter loves Canada, she did a year at University there to get her international degree. I went for five days as she was studying hard for exams - cracked a tooth on day two, and you can't buy paracetamol there! Had to buy some unknown red tablets, which luckily worked.

If you do decide to go alone, have a look at Riviera Solo travel. They are expanding their offer all the time. When I sell the house I'm going on one of their trips, haven't decided yet.

I understand about your husband not wanting to leave your dog. I hate leaving my dog too and was so upset last year - I put him in his usual kennels for two weeks as I was going to SA to volunteer with my daughter at a wildlife centre. Seemed so wrong he was locked up whilst I went to look after other animals! Whilst I was away the kennels were flooded by torrential storms. When I returned to collect him he was limping - as he'd been so wet all the time, he'd actually got a fungus in his pad. Awful, I felt so sorry for him but the kennel staff had done their very best to cope in dreadful conditions. I worry about putting him into someone's house as a 'boarder' in case he runs away or someone lets him out by mistake.

agnurse Tue 16-Apr-19 20:52:22

I think you should go. It sounds as if DH can manage at home.

As far as travel goes, U.S. and Canada are generally quite safe so you should not have issues going solo.

The one thing you'll want to do in advance is determine where you want to go. I'm not trying to be patronizing, but IME with Hubby's British family, some Europeans tend not to realize that these are HUGE countries. To give some perspective, my parents took a photograph on Signal Hill in St. John's, NFLD. This is almost if not absolutely the farthest point east in Canada. They have signposts that indicate distances to various cities. You are literally closer to London in St. John's than you are to Vancouver - and Vancouver is in the same country. Consequently, if you're thinking you're going to stay a week and visit Toronto, Calgary, and Vancouver - well, that's not going to happen due to the distances involved.

janeainsworth Tue 16-Apr-19 21:46:08

I haven’t gone off by myself on a long trip but I’ve had frequent short trips to London or the Yorkshire Dales with my friends.
DHs do survive one’s absence I find, and your DH has your son for company anyway.

The trick is to make them fend for themselves. If you leave the freezer full of ready-made meals they won’t feel your absence as keenly as they will if they have to actually decide what to eat, go to the shops to buy the raw materials and then prepare and cook it themselves.

Enjoy your trip!

crazyH Tue 16-Apr-19 21:52:13

I'm sure there's another thread on a similar subject, posted today. Check it out.
All the best in your travels

ffinnochio Tue 16-Apr-19 22:33:15

I’ve travelled solo several times for 2/3 weeks at a time. My husband coped very well. I left some stuff in the freezer, but didn’t worry unduly. He was invited out for meals with friends, but generally reverted to ‘camping’ at home. Just a big tidy up before I got home. All was well.
Think his being at boarding school since he was 7 helped!

CanadianGran Tue 16-Apr-19 23:11:42

I'd say go for it! You're absolutely right that you need to see the world while you can.
I agree with others that a group tour might be a good decision at least for part of the trip. The tour worries about the logistics of travelling while you have the option of dining with travel companions. Plus Canada is huge and involves a lot of driving on the 'other side of the road'.
You can get good travel advice on Fodor's web site.

As for hubby, as long as he isn't resentful and you can truly enjoy yourself. I do know some people that will say 'yes dear go ahead' but then moan that they are left behind. Any adult should be capable of managing on their own for a while!

Fiona86 Sun 28-Apr-19 20:43:29

Go for it.

Happilyretired123 Sun 28-Apr-19 21:34:17

Thank you everyone - some good ideas to ponder!

Joyfulnanna Mon 29-Apr-19 00:41:03

Get ready for the best holiday ever!! You will meet people, talk without worrying about whether he's bored, eat when and what you like, you won't feel alone because it's common to go solo these days. Staff in hotels will look after you and I would recommend you book it..and if you do, have a wonderful time

NanaandGrampy Mon 29-Apr-19 00:45:45

I’ve travelled extensively in the US and Canada on my own and they’re 2 of my favourite destinations .

I use a mobility scooter and travel with it and these are both countries which are totally set up for older or disabled people . I think it’s a shame your DH doesn’t want to go but you’ll have a wonderful time even on your own .

I agree that travelling on an accompanies tour might be a good compromise but I don’t like to work to someone else’s timeline .

Do your research, then take your trip ! Good luck !

Sussexborn Mon 29-Apr-19 01:03:06

I found it quite liberating when I went to Malta on my own though I was recuperating after surgery. Not having to think about anyone else and just do exactly as I pleased for two whole weeks!

BradfordLass72 Mon 29-Apr-19 01:29:54

I am so envious, smile naturally I'd say 'go for it' as well. I just wish I had the chance for such travel.

It seems all the safety nets are in place for DH so don't worry - just GO!

Tartlet Mon 29-Apr-19 01:44:18

I’ve been leaving my husband at home for more than ten years now. He wasn’t too keen on my going on my own at first but, as he’d told me that he wasn’t going to go on holiday any more, it was either go alone or not go at all and there are far too many places I still want to see for me to just give up and sit in a corner knitting.

He’d still rather I stayed at home and initially I think he felt hurt that is even consider going without without him but he’s resigned to it now. But he shows no interest in where I’m going or what I’ve done and that can be quite hard to cope with at times.

But I’ve come to consider solo holidays as a blessed relief from having to compromise on anything and it’s so freeing to just be able to please yourself. I do admit though to sometimes having ‘happy couple envy’ when I’m away.

All my solo holidays have been ‘seeing and doing’ ones and I’m not sure how well I’d cope in my own with a ‘flop and drop’ one.

Brace yourself for the dreaded single supplement. There are very few genuine no single supplement holidays around.

rosecarmel Mon 29-Apr-19 03:14:30

My husband and I traveled together and separately - My sister and her husband do the same - The U.S. is massive .. !
From glaciers to tropics, mountains to prairie, desert to forest -

David0205 Mon 29-Apr-19 09:27:45

There are several tour companies that specialize in singles holidays and if you are willing to share with another lady there won’t be a single supplement. Also there is probably a “travel buddy” group near you that you can meet others before you travel. I suggest google “Explore” and see the vast range of trips you can take, there are other companies as well, then go for it!

grannyticktock Mon 29-Apr-19 09:52:32

Singles holidays from specialist companies such as One Traveller or Just You don't charge a singles supplement or expect you to share a room. Although most people on these trips are widowed or divorced, there are always a few people who have a partner at home that doesn't want to travel, and that's OK too. You might find the company of other solo travellers better than travelling with couples.

Joyfulnanna Mon 29-Apr-19 10:33:23

Tartlett, do we have the same partner??!! Mines the same as yours. no interest in going on holiday. It's not really what I want but I try and make the best of it.

grannyticktock Mon 29-Apr-19 17:04:05

Tartlett and Joyfulanna, you'll have to introduce your menfolk to each other, so they can sit at home and keep each other company while they watch football or something while you two go off and see the world.

Tartlet Wed 01-May-19 03:32:04


I’m looking forward to my first river cruise next month. No single supplement fortunately.

Grannyticktick, you mention Just You. I went with them once but wasn’t impressed with the resort, hotel or tour guide so haven’t considered them since. They don’t overtly charge a single supplement but it’s included in the price nevertheless. Just out of interest I costed a similar holiday with their sister company Travelsphere, adding the single supplement and Travelsphere came out quite a bit cheaper. The bonus with companies like Just You is the company of other single travellers.

grannyticktock Wed 01-May-19 08:39:50

Tartlet, I've used Just You a couple of times. One of the tour guides was very good, and we also had a local guide with us the whole time; the other guide wasn't so good, a bit lazy. The hotels varied, with good and bad points, but overall I really enjoyed the holidays. It's worth reading their forum reviews when choosing. One Traveller (also used twice) are excellent but a bit pricey and seem to be getting pricier. Both companies give each person a whole double room, and the price reflects that, but at least the headline price is what you pay.

Interesting what you say about Titan (who have the bonus of included travel to the airport). They also do some singles holidays now, but they tend to be at the start or end of the season for that particular area, not the best times to go. Saga do solo holidays too, as do Riviera. It's a growing market.

Tartlet Thu 02-May-19 21:00:57

Just to say that the door to door taxi service with Titan was a big buying point for me but it turned out to be a very bad experience. The saga is long and boring but I’ll always be very cynical about such things again. A few highlights included being called for 1.5 hours early and being expected to be ready to go out of the door, terrible confusion about the drivers next pick up (transport is shared and can entail a long and circuitous journey as a result) because they weren’t actually due to be picked up until the following day! Then a very long and surprising journey from Derbyshire to Heathrow because the drivers didn’t like motorways which meant that the poor people he was due to collect from Gatwick and take home ended up having to wait more than 4 hours for their left. Fortunately for me I wasn’t going until early the following morning otherwise I’d have missed my flight. I’ll spare you the rest.