I’m In Love.

I don't think age makes any difference to those feelings of being in love. Try not to be sad, try to think that this is an experience that not everybody gets to feel, and that those who have not felt like this have missed out on an enormous part of being a human being.
Make sure you eat properly, and look after yourself.

When we had a static caravels we became friendly with a couple in a situation not dissimilar to yours.
She had been a career first woman and had a very good and responsible job.
They met and fell in love.
His wife had dementia, he was also devoted to his wife but they had a relationship which his family all were fine with.
They didn’t live together but came to the caravan most weekends.
Sometimes his family came to visit on Sunday and they would all go out for lunch.
Very occasionally he brought his wife for the day, she was happy enough but didn’t know who anyone,including him, was.
Good luck.
Ideal.? I can’t judge, but it suited them.
How it ended, maybe they still do it, I don’t know, we left when my own H’ dementia started.

Enjoy you loving feelings. Of course he loves his wife but she isn't the same woman he married, but still his wife. He obviously thinks a lot of you and must enjoy your company else you wouldn't be in the picture. You obviously want more but bide your time, be there for him as long as it suits you and if it is meant to be ..... ......... Be happy xxxx

Don’t feel bad you seem a lovely caring person with a conscience and understanding you are lucky to have found someone to love and who cares for you No one knows what’s round the corner
All I can say it what will be will be and I wish you every luck in the world and that you can hopefully have some years with this man in the future x

Apparently it is not at all unusual for a spouse to visit a dementia patient with the new partner in tow.
Obviously you wouldn't wish the wife dead, but I hope you will eventually be able to spend time together.

Oh wow, you are all so kind in your replies. I will take all your thoughts on board and thank you sooo much.

Enjoy every moment no matter how big or small.love is love no matter what age I wish you well. He's having a very hard time because of his wife and your support will mean the world to him. Wishing you both well x

It just proves you never know what is round the corner, and never too late for love,enjoy your time together,,i hope all goes well for you both

que sera sera.

How lovely for you both - a late blossoming rose is still just as beautiful.

I'm sure your sweet man needs the love and kindness you bring, it must be heartbreaking to 'lose' his wife this way.

But now, after 9 years of strain and sadness, he has you. Fate can be magical at times.

Give him the support he needs. One day he will be free and maybe your friendship will blossom into something really special. Best of luck. ?

I used to work in dementia care, and really your story is not uncommon. This gentleman sounds lovely , and no doubt he still feels devotion to his wife, but he is still able to enjoy your company. His relationship with his wife is a one-way street now - he cares about her but she would have no idea of who he is any more. It is quite normal in these circumstances, for the remaining spouse to have a friend / partner in "the real world" . Don't discount the idea of having a relationship with him - sometimes love happens at the most unexpected times and we should enjoy it when it comes.

Ho wonderful, beautybumble! And yes, it does go to show that life is full of surprises even in our later years! My guess is this is "driving (you) nuts" b/c you feel you "shouldn't" feel this way, not for a married man. But the wife he knew is "gone" and probably has been for several years now. I bet she doesn't even know who he is anymore, does she? You are probably what's making it possible for him to continue to be there for her. You are each bringing something to the other. So enjoy!

There are as many kinds of love as there are people. Enjoy today because tomorrow we can't know