Thank you so much everyone for your kind replies, what comes over is we all lead very different lives, and some of us are perhaps more sensitive or lacking self esteem than others! I must admit that when I wrote this, it was immediately after their visit, we’d had a family party, and some of the family had stayed on for a few days, all the organising etc had left me exhausted, but a day or two later, I’m reviving, getting back to normal, and all the ‘grans’ interesting replies are both comforting and thought provoking. This is the first time I have written to an online forum, and it’s good to know there are so many caring people out there wanting to comment.