Husbands friends.

Dawn22 - no it is not. She has often criticised me in other areas such as mothering skills relating to adult children. This was done in a private conversation between us so I was able to defend myself. This, coming from a woman who rushed over to her adult son when she saw him napping on her sofa and started stroking his face and hair in front of his lovely wife who looked on in amazement!!

Can l ask is this your only problem?

A quizzical smile and "Did you mean to be so rude?"

Hubby needs to support you in this it’s his friend.
Straight in next this happens Do you practice being a bitch or goes it come naturally in a loud voice.

What’s simply awful is that there are some thin/ slim women who will fat shame other women and some overweight women who will be equally unkind about thin/ slim women.

janeainsworth I'm size 10 and have been on the receiving end of some really snide comments since school.
In recent years I've started standing up for myself when I'm expected to squash into the middle seat on a plane or in a car for example. I always book the aisle seat on a plane but twice now strangers have asked me if I'd swap. Err, no!

Skinny arsed tart!

I’m 5’8” and a size 12, so I guess that’s me.
Why is it alright to be nasty about slim women, Evie?

Be prepare with a comeback for her and for your husband as well.
Do not be intimidated by a stick insect with a personality disorder, put her in her place, doing it publicly will reinforce it.

This has to be very high on the list of nasty gransnet threads. suziewoozie is right, don't go if you don't want to and have an adult discussion with your husband about your relationship.

She sounds like the bitch queen from hell! Skinny arsed tart! How dare she! Next time she makes a personal comment just say "Why do you think it's okay to make comments like that, I've never told you that you look like a boy have I?"

I would ask her in detail about all aspects of her diet and exercise regime. Then sympathise with her as to how little time she must have to pursue such interesting pursuits that you have, then give her an AtoZ at length of all the great things in your life and how unfortunately you would never have the time to do as she does.

Ha ha! Mosie! ?

My sister has a great saying. ‘As you get older you widen or wizen’. You could simply say ‘ well I’ve widened you’ve wizened, that’s ageing’. Should shut her up.

Honestly it did make me think about a work colleague who makes rude remarks, I don't think she knows she does it? Not really sure but I just smile and change the subject to ask her about herself and she then just chats away happily x

Thanks everyone. Many interesting opinions. I think we should close this discussion now as it’s getting away from the original statement. I really didn’t expect 132 replies! Thank you again everyone for your input. It prevented me from feeling alone.

None of us are saying go straight in with these ‘ comebacks’, just be prepared if she starts again. I’m fed up of feeling like we always have to analyse why someone behaves the way they do, at the expense of someone else’s feelings.

Notanan2 you just seem to take the extreme in every discussion just for fun so I'm not fussed what you think x

No she didnt Yennifer. If you recognise yourself in her description, then maybe..

Suziewoozie you just deliberately insulted everyone on this thread, that's nasty x

I disagree with you suziewoozie and don’t see it as a nasty thread. I am an agreeable person and a polite one and have been really put down by this woman on more than one occasion, usually in private. She knows what she is doing. I needed some cheering up and it worked. Some of the answers were really funny but that’s as far as it goes. To be honest, I was reading all the replies with tongue in cheek and having no intention of going back to her house to be horrible to her. I am not that type of person. However I can see humour in the replies rather than nastiness. If you don’t like the thread, then why comment twice. Hope this explains my position. No offence intended.

This is just another nasty thread ( on the whole) with women coming up with ideas as to how to be horrible to other women. I posted very early in this thread - just don’t go if you don’t like her company and sort your unsupportive husband out. As for all the ‘clever’ ideas being put forward for hiw to respond. Grow up. When I’m planning to go to someone’s house, I’m thinking of what gift to take them and looking forward to our time together.

i guess that's best

Thin women are real women too

To go to someones house planning to "pull them down a peg" is horrible advice.

The woman doesnt sound fun or tactful, but you can give the benefit of the doubt and say maybe she doesnt have insight into how blunt she is coming across. But to PLAN to go to her house with a stock of mean cutting things to say to put her down? I hope the OP wouldnt do that!

I'm with notonan, if you don't like this woman, why spend time with her.
Honestly - all these very unpleasant, passive aggressive suggestions about how to deal with this situation. Being straight forward and honest is the way to go, or avoiding the situation if you feel unable to do that.

If people make jokes are say mean things I pretend I don't understand and make them explain till they get uncomfortable and to away x