Is it a bad idea to share my home with daughter and family?

My maternal grandmother came to live with us after my grandfather died, we sold the house we lived in, she sold hers on the Sussex coast, and moved up to Surrey with us and we bought a larger house. She had her own sitting room and bedroom, although may parents hadn't got round to separating the living arrangements completely. She was only with us for a couple of years, I was aged between 10/11 and 13 and then she died. I did pick up on certain tensions, between her and my parents, inevitably they had different ways of doing things. My brother and I would sneak off to her part of the house, because she didn't impose the restictions on what we could and couldn't watch on the tv. I remember her most of all for her steamed puddings I've never tasted any as good as hers.

I hope you work out an arrangement to your mutual satisfaction, I think one where you had some autonomy would be best from what you have told us.

We shared a house with my parents, although my father died within a few months. We'd been living next door to them, purely by coincidence, so were accustomed to the proximity.

My mother said she wanted her own front door, but that didn't quite work out with the house we bought together. However, She had her own kitchen and bathroom, her own sitting room and bedroom, as well as a conservatory, all on the ground floor while we lived mainly upstairs.

I'd say that, if you all usually get along OK, it should be possible to make it work. I'd advise making sure that you all have your own spaces to retreat to though!

Looking on the black side. What if your daughter and son in law split up? What if you fell out with them, I’m sure you think that could never happen. And yes, what if you had a stroke or something and they didn’t want to care for you?
Sorry, lots of ‘what ifs’, but probably the sort of things you need to think about.

Why don't you suggest that they rent out their house for a year or so, if you decide to give it a go, rather than them selling up-in case it doesn't work out as well as you all think it will. Would your daughter really want to be your carer in later life? What about when the children are rowdy teenagers? Could you swap houses? Two properties are a much better investment than one, or do they rent? Are they trying to get a free house? Have you got other children who think they will inherit a share? Lots to think about.