I have no idea about family law, having never experienced divorce or the such. I do know it sounds a very unhealthy environment for young children, and am not surprised Granb3 is so worried. It is lovely when you can look back and realise what you should have done, but not helpful. I’m sure there’s been mistakes all round, but those small children shouldn’t have to pay for them. They need to come first and be protected at all cost, and if that means applying for custody, residence, or just bedding down for the night...whatever you want to call it, even if it’s just temporary, that’s maybe what’s needed until you can get proper legal advice.