is this normal

My friend always told her boys to wait till after their father had eaten his meal before mentioning something they wanted/needed or anything which could in anyway be deemed controversial!

I agree with FarNorth maybe your husband doesn't want to chat as soon as he gets home. Give him time to relax first unless there is something that needs to be shared straight away. I don't always want to discuss my day as soon as I get home.

Not as a regular event, but then him coming home from work at a regular time wasn't a regular event either as he travelled a lot.

But we did talk about work, he is/was a consultant engineer and I was interested in the proects he worked on and lthe technologies involved and later we worked in the same industry and the knowledgeI gained over the years was really helpful.

My husband had a stressful job and would come in, say hello to the kids, nothing to me, go and have a shower and change out of his uniform and then speak to me. He needed a good half hour to get his mind away from sometimes shocking things and turn into husband and father again. Give the poor man some slack and understanding. If you try and force the issue it turns into a massive problem, just let him come round in his own time.

To ask my husband how the day went would simply have been extending the work scenario. Home was separate. Right up until the day he died my heart did a little flip when I heard him enter our house. Lovely.

First words from H would be 'what time we having dinner 'then 'fancy a cuppa'? My signal to put the kettle on.
I do miss him.

If my husband walked in and said ‘ Hi honey, I’m home’, I knew all was well. If he came in quietly....I waited for the dust to settle, usually washing up after tea, out of kids earshot!

Does it really matter I m sure if your day had been an arxx of a day you would tell him likewise if it had been spectacular you would leap at him as soon as he got through the door
Sure.y you don’t expect him to have ‘How’s your day been’ as he walks in every day and nor do you need to quote it doesn’t it come out during the evenings conversation if there’s anything to come out

I would not ask someone how their day has been as it can take time to settle when you first meet up at the end of the day. We used to talk about general things and anything interesting about the day would emerge in time.

Hello Sophie22 it would not be normal for myself and Mr J but it looks as though it has become the norm for the two of you. As other have said try not asking him but launching in with how your day has been and see what response you get. Good luck.

My DH never asked how my day was and I never asked him either.
If we wanted to say something about our day, we just said it.

Maybe your DH doesn't really want chat the minute he comes in the door, tho.

Yes dive in with what you’ve done maybe not trivia like each item of cleaning, say who you saw shopping, who phoned or messaged, garden highlights.
I do just that!.

Comma removed

Yes dive in with what you’ve done maybe not trivia, like each item of cleaning, who you saw shopping, who phoned or messaged, garden highlights.
I do just that!.

Try not asking next time. Instead, launch straight into "Well, I've been pretty busy today. I have . . . . . . . " etc.

Yes seems very normal. Men just don’t seem to think about these social niceties in my opinion. Maybe after you’ve asked them, but not before.