Annoyed But Need Tact

Grammygrammy, I have just read your post in which you scold me rather badly and without justification. Please don't do this in future.

Blinko

Callistemon21

I thought our weigelia was dying but, if it wasn't, DD just finished it off with a good pruning the other day. It's looking worse still but maybe I'll leave it until spring.

Our weigela was enormous so I cut it down to about a third of its height. This year, it's coming back beautifully.

Oh, thank you, Blinko ?

As far as I’m concerned pyracanthas are weeds . They grow ridiculously fast . The school behind my mothers bungalow decided to plant it along the fence . It took over the gardens of all the bungalows and we used to get cut to ribbons trying to control it . In the end we all complained to environmental health who forced the school to remove it . There was already a nine foot metal fence in place so I don’t know they planted it in the first place !

DaisyDaisyDaisy, a good point, and Yes, I do very much so. My son is helpful and kind to everybody and deserves to be thanked and appreciated and most people do so.

I think it's a man thing.

My heart sinks when I see my DH with a pair of secateurs in his hand. It's even worse when he gets the hedge trimmers out.

He 'prunes' everything in sight whether it needs it or not. I end up following him around ordering - yes, ordering - him to leave my plants alone!!!

I have considered hiding the secateurs and hedge trimmers but I do actually need him to cut the hedge from time to time. He just doesn't know where to stop

Callistemon21

I thought our weigelia was dying but, if it wasn't, DD just finished it off with a good pruning the other day. It's looking worse still but maybe I'll leave it until spring.

Our weigela was enormous so I cut it down to about a third of its height. This year, it's coming back beautifully.

I agree with Callistimon21 sometimes bushes if heavily pruned bounce back much better so wait n see. At least your son helps you

Hello
I'm curious....Do you ever say thank you to Your son after all he is not young himself but takes time out of his day to help You ?

Welbeck, yes, I did make a similar complaint last year. Some of the advice I have read here has been helpful notably Callistemon's and I think my problem has gone away.

Bijou

My garden is mainly shrubs and because it is difficult to find real gardeners have always had a problem since I had to give up gardening myself seven years ago. Latest so called gardener just attacked all the shrubs with a hedge trimmer so they are all round shapes. I can no longer get out into the garden unless someone tales me in the wheelchair.

Bijou I remember when MIL could no longer manage her garden, we weren't near enough to help so she found a lovely older couple who came to help; they were very reasonable.
His idea of pruning was to use a hedge trimmer and slice the tops off shrubs so they were all uniform and flat-topped!

They were so nice she never said anything ?

GrammyGrammy

I think you are very blessed to have a 60 year old son who helps you a lot around the house and garden. Do you think he exists to serve you? Did you specify exactly what you would prefer for each plant? No, you let him do it without interruption so that you could be unhappy. You are being unbelievable. What do you do for him?

Wow!!!! That’s a bit harsh!!!!

Great idea I did this with my blackcurrant bushes to avoid chopping the new growth and2 yr branches in error! I think this is easiest way, maybe

Bijou

My garden is mainly shrubs and because it is difficult to find real gardeners have always had a problem since I had to give up gardening myself seven years ago. Latest so called gardener just attacked all the shrubs with a hedge trimmer so they are all round shapes. I can no longer get out into the garden unless someone tales me in the wheelchair.

I also have mainly shrubs in my garden, they are pretty much all that will grow due to the shade of tall hedges and trees ( not mine), poor quality, dry soil underneath hedge and a boggy area in one corner! When I bought the house all the bushes were lovely looking, a straight trunk with a rounded top ( think lollipops!) but I’ve struggled to get them cut the same way since.

Initially I was able to do the pruning although I wasn’t very good but now I pay someone and they tend to ignore my instructions and do what they want! So now, some bushes are very bushy with low branches, others have grown into the hedge with no defined shape. However, I’m just grateful that I can pay someone to help me in the garden as I certainly can’t do much myself anymore.

Next year I’m going to find someone to do the pruning, weeding and digging on a weekly basis rather than just have the lawns cut fortnightly.

As your son hates to be micromanaged how about taking him out frequent cups of tea or glasses of water so that you have a good excuse to be around what he’s doing?
Good luck

Can't help thinking you either need to put up with him not following your instructions, or else pay someone to do it.

I thought our weigelia was dying but, if it wasn't, DD just finished it off with a good pruning the other day. It's looking worse still but maybe I'll leave it until spring.

Caleo

PS as a practical measure I'll put the secateurs in my knicker drawer.

???

Shout and scream, and don't give him any pudding. Or be very brave, but obviously close to tears.

Seriously. Unless he realises the gravity of what he's done, he'll just do it again.

Caleo

PS as a practical measure I'll put the secateurs in my knicker drawer.

Lol!

Why would your son be so upset because you point out his error? He's your son just tell him he got it wrong and not to prune the shrubs again as you like the 'natural' look. Pyracanthas are tough old plants, they'll recover. We had a large one in our last garden unfortunately right next to the garage door, so for safetys sake DH clipped it back regularly. It seemed to like the attention and was smothered in berries every year.

I like to let our garden grow a bit wild (don't really like 'controlled' plants), but in the autumn and spring I prune and clip with fervour, especially the roses which then grow with renewed vigour and make a wonderful display.

My garden is mainly shrubs and because it is difficult to find real gardeners have always had a problem since I had to give up gardening myself seven years ago. Latest so called gardener just attacked all the shrubs with a hedge trimmer so they are all round shapes. I can no longer get out into the garden unless someone tales me in the wheelchair.

it's probably more efficient in terms of his time and labour expended to cut back most everything while he is there.
i would do the same.
the option is to pay for a professional gardener.
didn't you make the same complaint last year ?

My mum used to prune things to within an inch of their lives! Everything came back beautifully the next year!

PS as a practical measure I'll put the secateurs in my knicker drawer.

Callistemon I have this engraved on my heart believe me.

"Your relationship with your son is far more important than any tree or shrub, Caleo".

Thanks so much you have improved my life . You have broadened my perspective and that is what I needed.

Thanks also to everyone else whose contributions have been along the same lines.