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Dating sites

(16 Posts)
suninthewest Fri 03-Mar-23 12:29:10

I have just joined a dating site I have been single for a long time and not dated anyone for decades. Last time I was single and looking for someone I was in my 20s, young, pretty and in a job where I met men from all sorts of backgrounds all the time. In those days I had a fair choice of good looking men (didn’t appreciate it at the time) Things of course are different now I’m in my 60s. I haven’t seen anyone so far on the site I am even mildly attracted to ( I know I have to be patient). When I was young I always relied on instant attraction, a spark from the outset was important). Would love to hear other peoples experiences of dating again when older and being on dating sites and any thoughts and tips would be gratefully accepted. I keep myself safe and am aware of that aspect of it so that’s at least one worry I don’t have.

pen50 Fri 03-Mar-23 14:57:12

Met my (lovely) husband on Elite Singles (ghastly name, paid for site.) I was 61, he was 63. We married three years later.

Treat it all as a game, an excuse to get out of the house, and take the relationship very slowly. It's easy to fall hard and fast, but remember that hormones mess with your rational brain, even in your sixties. Don't marry for money, you'll be miserable; as importantly, don't let a bloke marry you for money, you'll be even more miserable!

suninthewest Fri 03-Mar-23 14:59:07

thanks pen50, like the way you say treat it as a name and an excuse to get out the house, will remember that - I def need an excuse to get out of the house!

Moonwatcher1904 Fri 03-Mar-23 15:08:47

I'm sure many people have found happiness on dating sites but many have found heartache. There has been much publicity on tv about people being scammed out of thousands on these sites both men and women. If they start asking for money I would take a step back. I hope you find someone decent but please be careful.

suninthewest Fri 03-Mar-23 15:28:33

Thanks Moonwatcher1904, I gave read about a few cases and all the women seemed intelligent people so there’s something to be learned from that ie it can happen to any of us. I am wary of dating again ( issues other than cash) but then people say you have to let your guard down a bit in order to give people a chance

mumski Fri 03-Mar-23 17:23:24

suninthewest I'll watch with interest any replies. I'm in a very similar situation to you and am very nervous about it all. Good luck to you.

suninthewest Fri 03-Mar-23 21:59:28

Thanks mumski, I’ve been single for so long and no one has ever shown interest in me in that time which would be depressing but I’m reliably informed that even young folks meet their partner online these days.

dragonfly46 Fri 03-Mar-23 22:09:19

I have a friend who tried many dating sites but found the best to be Classic FM.

suninthewest Sat 04-Mar-23 00:03:48

Thanks dragonfly46, I’ve thought about that one. There used to be a Guardian one that I thought looked good too but they don’t do it anyone more

Zodiacdream Tue 07-Mar-23 12:14:32

I'm recently single after 15 years married!!! Don't know how we got that far tbh. I'm 61 and haven't been put off meeting a new partner and will probably go down the dating sites route. Do your research and be careful.

Yammy Tue 07-Mar-23 12:41:26

Be very careful if you live in an isolated area or part of the country. I have been told and know it's true, a woman met a man on a dating site and went out with him quite a few times. She then realised his previous partner had been her ex-daughter-in-law.
Make sure you get full names in this case shortened names had been used.
Best of luck,I also know someone who met a partner /husband eventually and they were happy for 30 years.

Daisymae Tue 07-Mar-23 16:38:31

I would concentrate on meeting up with people who you have something in common with. Build a friendship first rather than expect the love of your life to appear.

Debbi58 Tue 07-Mar-23 20:23:51

I met my second husband online , 15 years ago , we dated for a year before he proposed, we we're both in our mid forties at the time . We met for a coffee at first, then we went out for an evening drink , then dinner etc . We took our time getting to know each other, I would say , trust your instincts, know what you want in a partner. And have fun 😃

Nannynoodles Tue 07-Mar-23 21:24:43

I met my new husband online 12 years ago, I was 53 and he 59.
We met through eHarmony which wasn’t the cheapest (cheaper for men as they are in short supply apparently!) but seemed to be the best although obviously things might have changed in the past 12 years.
As long as you don’t take it too seriously and are careful about not giving too much personal information out initially it’s fun.
I had quite a few dates before being lucky enough to meet Mr N for a drink and curry after several long phone calls.
Even though the previous dates weren’t right for me I enjoyed every one - even the ones who looked nothing like their photos, one admitted to it being 15 years out of date and another had not one tooth in his head which made for an interesting lunch date!
Just be careful to meet in a public place and let someone know where your going, I always arranged for a friend to ring me about an hour in to give me a get out quick if needed, although it never was.
Good luck, enjoy and trust your instincts.

Awesomegranny Sun 19-Mar-23 17:10:52

Recently joined a site, so many on it appear to be scammers as people are constantly being blocked by admin! Seems to me noone is interested in a 60 year old unless they are over 80 or over friendly and try to get you off the site onto emailing them as they are scammers beware! I wish you the best of luck and hope you fare better than myself

AnneWilson Thu 23-Mar-23 19:52:03

Is that site good and worth joining?