I have a mobility problem and my husband's angry all the time

Your GP sounds totally useless, that is an appalling attitude! If you can scrape the money together for a private consultation, please so that. You are not old, totally deserve a decent retirement and if something should be done it needs doing now, not two years down the line or possibly not at all. Your post has made me feel so angry on your behalf, please don't accept this until you have investigated every avenue.

Did he come with you to see your consultant?
I think you should definitely take him next time and encourage him to put his questions and concerns directly to the specialist.
I would hope that having a proper conversation with a consultant would be a good thing to do for both of you.
I'm not sure a GP will necessarily have all the required knowledge?

I may be wrong of course - they may know all there is to know.

tanith

I’m so sorry things are so difficult for but I do wonder if you have asked what can be done. I have Achilles tendon damage with a bone spur on one heel and I was told that as a last resort surgery to remove the bone spur is an option. I decided not to pursue the surgery option as it isn’t painful now.
I do hope things improve for you.

I think there may be a possibility of surgery down the line, but my GP has said there will need to be a two year period of physio before I will be considered for it — by which time they may deem me too old/ not suitable. I have five different spurs, three on one foot, two on another. I also turn out to have a congenital abnormality in the bone which has complicated things with my Achilles tendon, so it's a bit more than 'just' bone spurs. My GP is a bit 'well, now you're over 60 these things tend to come to the fore'. And just as a warning to all, my feet blew up (as it were) when I was doing Couch to 5k and trying to increase my fitness for an active retirement.

Your DP is behaving badly but he is also mourning the change in the situation. The plans he had for you both may not be possible. Try to be patient with him and ask for an orthopaedic referral to discuss your options. Good luck.

He's probably in shock with your news and can't cope with the possibility that your retirement might not be as you had planned. Could you jointly do some research to find out if it is possible for you to have an operation. Maybe it will give you both a bit more control of the situation... good luck

Sorry to be hard but he sounds a very unsympathetic, uncaring man and one I d rather be without
Selfish bloke (I nearly said something else to describe him) thinking not of you but just himself you deserve better
Do as others have said check out if there is any surgery to get you out of this painful situation
Sending a big hug your way

I think you both need to find out for sure, what if anything can be done.
He might calm down once he knows what is what, and accept things?

In an ideal world, as he has plenty of energy, he would use that doing household chores.

He may be angry too at loss of attention directed towards him?

Currently you are being let down by him in my opinion.

You can have surgery to remove bone spurs, if not on the NHS then maybe your husband would like to pay for it to be done?

I dare say you won’t get much sympathy from him whatever you do. I would call him out on his awful attitude.

I’m so sorry things are so difficult for but I do wonder if you have asked what can be done. I have Achilles tendon damage with a bone spur on one heel and I was told that as a last resort surgery to remove the bone spur is an option. I decided not to pursue the surgery option as it isn’t painful now.
I do hope things improve for you.

Yes, he's having difficulty accepting that a lot of our plans may have to change. I'm just about to retire, partly as a result of this situation with my heels, and it looks as if I won't be able to do half the things we've always wanted to do together. I'm grieving the loss of my mobility and it seems really tough being asked to manage his disappointment too. He won't lose out on anything: he can still walk the Camino de Santiago, he can still do all the things we planned to do — but he'll just have to do them in a group that doesn't include me. I'm not going to hold him back. I feel very let down by him. Instead of empathising with me for all I am likely to lose, he's made it all about him.

Ill health temporary or permanent comes to many of us as we age. It seems as though your Husband is in denial and just wants your lives to be as they were. If sadly it is a condition you have to live with then your Husband needs to live with it too and support you and your needs. I am sorry you are going through such a difficult time and hope that things can and do improve for you.

Some people really struggle to cope with other people's disabilities (temporary or permanent). Can you sit down and talk to him about if he us one of them?

That's fine in theory but clearly not in practice.

“And do you take this woman……….in sickness and in health”