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Reached out to an ex after 15 years, need advice

(11 Posts)
petefig Sun 10-Sep-23 03:01:34

I reached out on FB to an ex from 15 years to see how things were going. She messaged me back with 90 minutes, sent me a friend request which I accepted and then we real time messaged with her asking me a ton of questions before I had to end our conversation since I had to be somewhere. Two weeks later she messaged me and we exchanged a couple of messages, but not in real time and then I asked if she wanted my number. She said yes and then 4 days later on a Saturday morning she messaged me asking what would be a good time to call during the weekend. I messaged back Sunday morning to call me any time after 5 pm Sunday. I never heard back and 10 days later, I messaged her to see what was going on. Four days later she messages me stating that she didn't get back because a couple of relatives had Covid and asked how I was doing. I responded back within 90 minutes to say hope everything was ok and I was home if she wanted to call. She never did and that was that. I wanted to get some advice as to what possibly happened. Why would someone respond to me quickly, send me a friend request, ask me a lot of questions and then later on ghost me?
I don't get it and am a little confused. I was really hoping that we could have rekindled something and I keep thinking that if I got back sooner on that weekend that she would have called and maybe we would have met and maybe something would have come out of it but this was months ago so I know there is no hope, but I am still confused. Would like any advice. Thanks

Allsorts Sun 10-Sep-23 06:30:28

I would definitely leave it. If someone contacted me and wanted to do speak of a weekend to be told after 5pm on a Sunday well the weekend has gone. It all sounds as if this wasn't the best time to reconnect, you're both too busy.

BlueBelle Sun 10-Sep-23 07:04:12

Pete are you young? in my opinion it’s never a good idea to go back to what obviously didn’t work the first time

I would imagine the lady was happy to hear from you as a ‘long lost friend’ but wanted nothing more and picked up from you that you were in your words hoping you could rekindle something She has a life now which is not with you and if she had wanted to rekindle something she has had opportunities and obviously doesn’t want that
There are lots of ‘maybes’ in your dreamy post but not in her world she has long ago moved on and you need to as well
Good luck in the future Petefig
Hope you find a different dream

tanith Sun 10-Sep-23 08:52:47

It was probably curiosity that peaked her interest she’s satisfied that and that’s it for her. Sad for you but just leave her alone now as has been said she has her life and you have yours.

Sparklefizz Sun 10-Sep-23 08:56:06

petefig I'm sorry you're disappointed, but remind yourself that your ex is an ex for a reason.

FarNorth Sun 10-Sep-23 09:07:35

This person seems quite self-centred and thoughtless, from what you've said.
She's not interested in rekindling anything or even in being polite, as far as I can see.

You're really not missing out on anything there.

lemsip Sun 10-Sep-23 09:54:31

you say you were hoping to rekindle something!

what after 15 years. give up .

Nana75 Fri 10-Nov-23 11:10:56

SAD. Definitely time to move on! Why try to reconnect with someone after all that time? The past is just that! Leave it there.Live in the here and now!

Smileless2012 Fri 10-Nov-23 11:19:34

I agree with BlueBelle, maybe she picked upon your wish to rekindle the old relationship and that's why she stopped responding.

Time to move on and I wish you well.

BlueBelle Fri 10-Nov-23 11:20:01

Why resurrect this post nana Pete went two months ago 😂

pascal30 Fri 10-Nov-23 11:20:39

I think we probably all wonder what if? at some point, but the reality is that if a relationship finished it probably can't be rekindled. She sounds as though she was happy to hear from you as an old friend but after further thought didn't want to take it any further. Nothing lost by you trying but now time to move forward and find someone else.. good luck