Hanging by a Thread

Callistemon21 I know this because one of them was concerned for me and let me know this was happening. I then went and spoke another of the neighbors who I've known on a friendly basis, who confirmed it.

Theexwife This child screams at the top of his lungs and very disturbing. They would be directly in front of my windows. It happened once or twice in the beginning. The mother feels her child should be able to scream wherever he wants to. The yard is a good size in the back which was the original agreement.

. A large problem for me has been the mom going to the neighbors who have kids who play in the yard as well, and telling them and the kids, critical and untrue things about me.

How do you know this?

This is all rather odd 🤔

Hithere I cannot afford to leave due to my disability and fixed income. All I can do is find a way to look at this with some wisdom that doesn't seem to be coming to me, at the present. :-/ I have thought of it many times, but physically and financially cannot.

I think yard may be the American term for garden? So not a small backyard as we may think of here.

The child? I take it you don't like the child much?
Screaming is annoying though. There's a school near us and at playtime some of them scream - why?

eazybee Yes. I should clarify, my daughter, son in law and I already lived together for a few years with no problems before this. I also as thanks give them housekeeping help and help with their baby. We have spoken about the difficulty they are having with her in other areas, as well, many times. I am just worn as her demands and manipulative behaviors have been constant toward them and me since she moved here. They are in agreement, just afraid to do anything about it but appease her. Which brought me to write here for advice as I am completely spent mentally and physically.

Could you close the windows when the child is playing outside, surely a child cannot make that much noise.

If it is no longer working for you maybe it is time to look at other living arrangements for yourself.

I agree with VS

Clearly this living arrangement is not working out, too many cooks in the kitchen.

Namsnanny There is nothing especially attractive about the front yard. For 3 years the child has had kids over and played in the back yard which is a great play area. A large problem for me has been the mom going to the neighbors who have kids who play in the yard as well, and telling them and the kids, critical and untrue things about me. Now she has told my daughter the kids are scared of me (because of what she has said). I am very soft spoken, quiet and mind my own business. I feel she is trying to manipulate others to get her own way. She has done this since the beginning in various ways. She was upset when she moved in about the boundaries my daughter and son in law asked her to respect overall in the house. This is just one example. I would not have written about this here if it were not more serious than just being thankful I have a place to live. It is much more than that as I wrote about. Sorry, I've had a few responses that seem to overlook the whole picture. I appreciate you listening!!

My sympathies are entirely with the daughter and son -in-law.

lemsip Yes, that thought is what has motivated me to be kind and reach out to her. However, that is not the whole picture.

VioletSky There is a large yard to play. I raised 3 children and understand their need to play and grow, but I also taught them to respect the neighbors and other tenants. This child is taught no boundaries and screams extremely loudly as a habit. They end up right in front of my windows which radiates the sound with or without headphones. That is my issue and the mother's lack of teaching her child any boundaries.

What is wrong with the yard that was the agreed play space for the child? Too small ect.?

What is attractive about the front garden near your appt? Open to sun, Mum can see son playing etc.?

If there is no logical reason for the change, I would stick to the original agreement if I could.

you were very fortunate that your son in law built an 'inlaw' quarter for you. It was a very generous gesture of him. He then gave his sister and her child the same generous gesture.

Ilovecheese Yes there is a yard.

Is there a space at the back for the child to play out?

I am sorry you are struggling

This is a shared space that you all live in. I think it is unreasonable to say a child that lives there cannot play and make noise as long as this is at a reasonable time

I would suggest closing the windows while the child is outside, they will not be outside playing 24/7

You can also purchase noise cancelling headphones to watch TV or listen to music and perhaps some ear buds

Lots of people live next door to young families and have to make allowances for children exploring and growing nearby